Parents of the HS Class of 2014

Parents of HS Class of 20xx
11501

<p>Considering the winter we had this year, I’m finding myself quite glad that S’14 has selected Eckerd College - in Florida. We got off the airplane and everything is GREEN. Fortunately, with Accepted Students Day, he is still loving it. We’ll now need to visit in Jan and/or Feb and/or March to deliver care packages… and delivery might take a while.</p>

<p>Our middle son, at U Rochester, can have the care packages in Sept and/or Oct and or Nov and/or April…</p>

<p>They can come home for Christmas.</p>

<p>It seems to work well actually. ;)</p>

11502

<p>Did anyone go through a letdown after a decision was finally made? Though we would all be happy and ready to move on after S made his choice yesterday but I am finding I am still feeling a lot of guilt over having to rule out his true top choice because of affordability. He knew the ground rules going in…no merit, no go, but I think his tempered reaction to finally deciding between two remaining schools is making me hard to let it go and move on. Doesn’t help that two of his classmates are going to be attending his top choice, even though I truly believe his No. 2 was a better fit for him. I think I still need a drink from the SS Indecision crew!</p>

11503

<p>Well, I did feel a tiny bit of letdown after all was said and done, just because I was secretly hoping that S2 would choose to go to school in LA, since I have friends there and it is just a wonderful place to visit. Plus, we had a really fun visit to Occidental, he loved the campus and the school, and he could have even played football there, had he chosen to do so. But he is having a whale of a time at Tulane this past weekend; got all the official tours, sitting in on classes, got to go to Crawfest with his brother, and is generally loving his choice. I am glad my boys will be together, and yes, family is ultimately very important. S2 has been in touch all weekend, and it is heartening to see him so pumped up about the school and his program of study. </p>

11504

<p>@crowlady - Thanks, the link was great! Previously, I had a link to the 3D view, but it must have been updated because in the past it only showed lofted beds.</p>

<p>@Overtheedge - S has not shown a preference, yet. He is going to all the ASDs in the next couple of weeks which will not leave much time to request a re-evaluation of the FA offer.</p>

11505

<p>@creekland, popping in from Parents of 2015…I’d love to hear more about what your S thinks of Eckerd after admitted students day. Eckerd is on our list. Beautiful and relaxed campus! We wonder about the level of academic interest in the students (is it too relaxed? lol) and about the parties…every school has them…just want to learn more. ;-)</p>

11506

<p>@incadinca – we aren’t official (haven’t filed her SIR yet) but it’s pretty much a done deal for her top school. I don’t feel let down after visiting her 2nd choice, but I was a little disappointed that as great as UCSD is, it didn’t wow us more for D14. </p>

<p>I think it’s the small part of me that buys into the prestige thing, even though I firmly believe in the merits of being a bigger player in a smaller school. And I just know in my gut that the school at the top of her list will be a perfect fit-- but still, there is that little twinge of pride about the “higher” ranked school. I’m confident that when we go to the accepted student day, and she most likely files her SIR that day, I will feel a true jubilation. I’m looking forward to buying her the sweatshirt, lol. She was completely shocked when I asked her what style she wants from her final school choice, as she had no expectation of getting one.</p>

<p>I wonder if you’re just feeling a bit like the energy of excitement we have when getting acceptances was more than making the actual decision? It’s like your brain can wind down from action mode for a bit.</p>

11507

<p>Good morning, and so happy for those with decisions made! There is such a sense of relief, isn’t there?</p>

<p>Son '14 had an insane weekend, and he did not have to run in a track meet. Spent five hours washing cars for an after prom fundraiser – also picked up his NHS community service hours. He ran nine miles Sunday morning before spending six hours refereeing youth soccer games. No wonder he went to bed so early! Meanwhile, he also completed some homework and five scholarship apps. He only has one or two more apps to finish – thank goodness. The hardest thing is that he may spend hours and hours doing all these apps and come up empty. I asked him not to blame me if that happens, because I do not make the decisions. But, you have no chance if you do not fill out the paperwork, I pointed out. </p>

<p>Speaking of scholarships, I talked to a mom the other day who has been begging her son to do them, but to no avail. She told me that they will need to take out all kinds of loans to send him and a younger brother to college, because her husband spent a wad of money to send his daughters by his first marriage to very expensive New England LACs. She really did not have a say in the matter, either. Apparently each daughter had big tuition scholarships from lots of schools, mostly state schools, but their mom refused to have them go to schools like that. After all, what would the neighbors say? So he agreed to take out the loans, forgetting that he had two more kids who will be affected by that decision. </p>

<p>Now, you’d think that the son would have seen this, and with his outstanding GPA/ACT, would have considered a full ride offer? Then, there would be little or no debt. No way. The mom thinks my sons are crazy for selecting “those type of schools.” You cannot possibly get a decent education there. </p>

<p>I did remind her that my older son, the NMF kid who took one of those offers, will attend UVA Law on a full scholarship. She is a graduate of UVA.</p>

11508

<p>@incadinca, let down, of course, especially since you had to weigh $$ over pure choice. Keep reminding yourself of momread’s S and his full scholarship to UVA Law. Our student ambassador at a mid-tier school this wknd, who along w her bf was on full full tuition scholarship, was accepted to UC Berkley and an Ivy for law school. Her bf won a NSF award and had his pick and a # of top tier med schools and PhD programs. We love that school for it’s care of students. It’s a gem and top of our list, bc value wise, you can not beat it. My D keeps saying though “it just stinks that I can’t go to Vandy or Dartmouth or blah blah blah bc we are not poor and not super rich.” This part I don’t like. </p>

<p>Having said that and firmly believing in picking a fiscally responsible option, I’ve got one D in full court press trying to get off the Harvard wait list, just in case. She’s leaving no stone unturned. </p>

<p>Anyway, my H says, what if she gets off the Harvard wl? Not counting on it. But I think it’s important to teach kids to go for it w all your might. As a kid I was often afraid to try for fear of losing, that’s one thing I’ve tried to not pass on to my kids. </p>

<p>And we have submitted finl appeal letters just in case. Tons of work still going on in our home. </p>

<p>On top of that, we are going to another school’s accepted student’s day this week, and we will have to drive thru the night once again bc of rehearsal schedules. </p>

<p>I’m actually afraid for May 1 to come. We will have to make decisions. I want to be the parent above whose son is at Tulane having a ball! </p>

11509

<p>@shoboemom I can say after the first day of the visit (more today) my guy is very certain he made the right decision for himself. He loves the campus, the small school feel (small classes, one on one attention, sense of community, etc), and he is very much into the things Eckerd is into (green, sustainability, hands on learning - their motto - THINK OUTSIDE).</p>

<p>He has been told multiple times that there are two different groups of students - those who put effort into academics and those who party more. He’ll just need to pick his friends carefully. His plan is to hang out in the lab as much as he can and see who else is there. ;)</p>

<p>To be honest, it’s not much different than the two groups at my middle son’s Top 30 school… there will always be a segment who major in party.</p>

<p>Otherwise, this school fits the outdoor loving, barefoot walking, green, socially conscious, live and let live student. We saw a couple of students working on Organic Chemistry on a large board and we saw students out enjoying the water and many things in between (Sunday, so relaxing or studying would be expected). We didn’t see anyone here who yelled out “don’t come” or similar. They all seemed to be enjoying themselves - but I imagine it’s pretty self-selecting.</p>

<p>The only complaint we heard from students was about the food, and that happens at MANY colleges, including the Top 30 my middle son attends.</p>

<p>The professors we talked with seemed knowledgeable and genuinely interested in their students. They had multiple connections and used them to help students get internships at some pretty impressive places.</p>

<p>Eckerd marks the nametags of those here on Accepted Students Day so they know who is already attending and who is still deciding. My guy is attending. We found it interesting that professors seemed to seek out us to talk with us more/longer than others did (tour guides, admissions, etc) . My impression is that they were already interested in getting to know their freshmen class for next year - a good thing to me. The tour guides/admissions, etc were still in “sales” mode.</p>

11510

<p>^^^^@ Momreads…I just can’t believe “people” actually say those things! I know many many people who are successful without the “prestigious” degree. It is not where you go but what you do with your degree that counts! </p>

<p>Clarkson graduates on average make a higher salary than those graduating from Harvard. </p>

<p>My S’s GF would have most likely been accepted to a top tier / Ivy but chose to take a “free ride” at a very nice school ( Mount Holyoke). She will be success because of who she is - probably going on to Med school. </p>

<p>It really depends on what is right for each individual family. My S graciously turned down Brandeis because other schools offered better FA. </p>

<p>@incadinca‌ , I am starting to feel a little let down but also nervousness that S will pick the right school for him…I wonder how we ever got to this space - choosing between two schools that were not even being considered this time last year. Is one of the two right for him? Will he be happy and flourish in his new environment ? Of course how will he ever " function" without his Mom (lol)…if only I could turn back the hands of time and have my “little” boy again…it is hard letting go…</p>

11511

<p>

@AgentNinetynine I completely sympathize. We are in the same boat. I have to keep reminding everyone that is what we signed up for when we moved to a high-income community for the GREAT SCHOOL but knew we would be sacrificing a lot of financial security to live here. At the time (7th grade), the GT program in her old school had petered to nothing and teachers were telling her to just draw quietly in class (!!!) because the work was too easy for her. We had to do something, clearly. But it’s sometimes tough to be surrounded by peers who have new cars and iphones and a fat college savings account…</p>

11512

<p>

@PetraElise This was surprisingly important to my D (and me) as well! It just seems so much easier and more relaxed. D did not like the idea of having to think about or worry about how much she was spending on meals. I did not like the idea that she might skip meals to save money!</p>

11513

<p>Thanks all for the sympathy and compassion. I think it’s just hard at this moment when everyone else is making decisions, too, and I hear all the great schools. But once I focus on only what’s best for my child it all fine. Sometimes I feel like your D, @3tallblonds, bemoaning our status of “not super poor or super rich”. Then I slap myself and think of all the blessings my family has and the lucky position or son is in to actually have a choice! </p>

11514

<p>Okay - I need help with acronyms… what is UCSC? I’m not familiar with the California schools.</p>

<p>My big complaint with food at schools is that there seems to be so many fast food choices and cafeterias tend to be unappealing. My son complains about having no healthy choices and tends to order out quite a bit. D’s school has chipotle and chic-fil-a - great for once in a while but is that really great daily choices? </p>

<p>I think it’s normal to get twinges of all kinds after final selection. Even I got caught up in the …but such and such is ranked higher and closer to home…for a moment. Being comfortable is important. </p>

<p>And I’m sure everyone here can say what I can say - my husband and I went to very mediocre, okay public state schools and we’re happy and fairly successful people. It’s not like xyz is the only path to a meaningful life.</p>

11515

<p>Thanks for that virtual slap @incadinca. I seem to need one almost daily. </p>

11516

<p>@eyemamom - UCSC is UC Santa Cruz, a wonderful and very different type of college set in an amazingly beautiful chunk of California coast. It is known for its very liberal and environmental focus, and if you have a child who is in any of those marginalized social groups at high school, UCSC can be a great place for them - my student who is currently there was rather unhappy with high school, but is thriving there. Notably, there are no grades at UCSC - every student gets a personally written evaluation of their performance in each class. Thus, if you’re going to go there, you have to be comfortable with abandoning social norms like evaluating yourself via a GPA. This non-traditional zeitgeist is also summed up in their mascot. Firstly, they didn’t have one for many years, and then secondly, when for some reason the UC system required them to adopt one, they picked something that was an anti-mascot in a way, the banana slug. Yes, a large (the one I saw was about 8" long) bright yellow slug, native to the area. Not a fighting mascot in any way, shape, or form. :)</p>

11517

<p>Sounds like a pretty cool place - totally not for my kids but I could see the niche being wonderful for the right person. My sons mascot is a yellow jacket - lol Shockingly the school is not known for their sports.</p>

11518

<p>@incadinca Yeah, I understand the let down, but I don’t think it has anything to do with the school d picked. It’s where she wants to go and it’s really affordable. I won’t have to be on that ramen noodle every night kind of budget. My letdown is probably more about not getting to participate with other parents in the “where ya gonna go?” game. </p>

11519

<p>This made me chuckle @eyemamom:

</p>

<p>Thanks for the commiseration everyone. Spygirl is in much better spirits today and actually turned the corner yesterday afternoon. The crazy thing is she took this school off of her list weeks ago because she doesn’t believe they have a strong enough science program. I think it was really the pull of her friend who desperately wants to her to attend there that got her into such a funk. </p>

11520

<p>My favorite mascot in the college search? Concordia Moorhead and the ear of corn (Fear the Ear). Almost bought the t-shirt because it was so darn funny. (They’re the Cobbers, by the way.) </p>

<p>In other news . . . today, the fin aid acceptance went in the mail. It really is a lock now.</p>