<p>I need a box of tissues. D just walked in with her graduation invitations. She is my baby so this is the last time. I took one look and for the first time really thought about her leaving and was very teary. Of course D flew past me and rolled her eyes on the way out to her job. We have been so focused on the whole college decision that some of her last semester has just flown by. We have two schools left in contention so hope to have a decision soon.</p>
<p>These are my thoughts on rankings. S '11 is at Trinity University. It has been ranked #1 in US News for West Regional Universities for 21 years. He has had a wonderful experience with no class larger than 30 and only professors. Very, very hands on. Great study abroad and internships have been readily accessible. He was accepted at top ranked LAC but this fit his needs better and he received unbelieveable merit aid. </p>
<p>I graduated from Pomona back in the 80’s and all I heard was “Oh, you go to Cal Poly Pomona?” Hmm…I still get quizzical looks from some on the East Coast who have never heard of it. Of course, I was quite eager to show everyone the Forbes rankings where Stanford was #1 and Pomona #2. So, don’t go by name recognition or ranking, go by fit and graduating without debt.</p>
<p>@overthedge I concur about getting a 504 set up ASAP if your D is at a public school. My D had one last year and it was a lifesaver. She doesn’t need any more stress right now and that will take some of the pressure off assignments, tests, etc as well as facilitate communication with teachers. Best wishes to you both!</p>
<p>Congrats to all the offers received! It is heartening to see many parents here emphasizing fit over prestige and higher rankings.</p>
<p>For those still agonizing over decisions, I just want to say that college admissions only measures, imperfectly, academic, social and environmental fit of applicants as seen by adcoms. There are much more important qualities and attributes to being a wholesome person. I would argue that the shaping of character, for one, is infinitely more important than training and packaging a kid to appear academically and socially ready for HYPSM. Yet, countless hours and sleepless nights went into getting the best grades, test scores and activities. Not many kids keep their commitments when it is difficult to do so. It is also rare to see a kid who would take blame for his/her companions. It is rarer still for a kid to have the courage and integrity to be completely honest in the face of imminent punishment and alienation. I would take a kid like that in a heartbeat for any endeavor that doesn’t require subject matter expertise that s/he doesn’t have. (Even though colleges list character in their CDS as one of the factors in admissions, how would anyone really know the character of any applicant? Even the LOR writers can’t really know this unless they’ve been really close to their students for a long time.)</p>
<p>What I’m trying to say is this – in the grand scheme of things, where you are accepted and where you end up going is trivial compared to your development as a person, not just as a scholar, artist or athlete. Let them go where their heart desires.</p>
<p>Thank you everyone for your support and suggestions. Yes, D goes to a very large (@4000 students) and very bureaucratic public school. Graduation is early June and I believe senior grades must be in by May 27th. Thankfully, next week is our Spring Break. The downside is that I won’t be able to meet with her GC until the following week. I was under the impression that it takes awhile to get a 504 plan in place and didn’t think it would be possible at this stage of the game. Thanks for the suggestion. I am definitely going to explore this option. D is currently on “home bound” under a doctor’s note. That makes attendance a non-issue, but doesn’t excuse any work. A teacher comes and administers tests and quizzes. In some ways it makes it harder because D is having to teach herself everything. I met with her AP micro teacher and the Asst Principal the other week because she is the farthest behind in that class. Unfortunately, their suggestion was to take a medical withdraw and then complete (from start to finish) an online general micro class. Even though it would be easier, it seems like it would end up being a lot more assignments at this point (and she has an A on the work completed). On the hope and prayer that we can get D better over the summer, she is afraid that her acceptances and scholarships will be revoked if she drops down from AP. Especially because she has already withdrawn from AP bio in an effort to reduce her workload. </p>
<p>@overtheedge My experience with public schools and this type of situation is that you MUST advocate hard. If it were my D, I would call the guidance office right now and demand to speak to someone before break and insist that the 504 get fast-tracked to be in place when classes resume after break. I know that at some schools, the work can be extended into summer, which would certainly alleviate some of the immediate stress, and allow her to stay in the classes and keep her good grades. </p>
<p>I also think it’s unlikely that your Ds acceptances would get rescinded when this is due to a medical issue… but maybe it wouldn’t hurt to call the colleges and make certain. It might be a big relief for her to hear that, if it’s true.</p>
<p>@overtheedge - If your D is on “homebound” instruction, isn’t the school required to supply “teaching” time from a certified teacher? Here, I believe the number is 2 hours/week/core class. So if she is taking a math, a science, an english and a social studies class, she would be entitled to 8 hours of teacher time, not just a teacher for quizzes and tests. From experience, a 504 can be implemented quickly for medical reasons. Hoping for a quick recovery for your D.</p>
<p>That’s also been my experience @overtheedge . The required meetings and paperwork make getting a 504 in place in a matter of weeks isn’t going to happen. However, I don’t understand why individual teachers don’t have the power to say, Yep, good enough. And stop asking for more work. She’s in AP classes. Is there really any danger of her not mastering the basics needed for the diploma?</p>
<p>@overtheedge You could also investigate exactly what she has to have to graduate. At this point, most kids have almost all the credits they need. My son’s GC told him he had enough after the first trimester to graduate. Perhaps she doesn’t have to focus on ALL the classes. </p>
<p>@ordinarylives - I am going to try to pursue the 504, but I have a sinking feeling you are right with respect to timing. This is not an easy school to navigate. I am certain D has far exceeded mastery of the basics for a diploma. But because she is in AP, she apparently has to meet those requirements to get credit for the course. A few of her subject classes are needed for graduation. I am meeting with teachers to see what can be done. It is so crazy. In what world does a kid with a 4.4 GPA, this close to the finish line, possibly not graduate? </p>
<p>@student4ever - her home bound teacher is a very nice certified home-economics (cooking, interior design etc) teacher. </p>
<p>They are required to have 4 English so she needs AP Lit. She’s not behind in that class and the AP exam isn’t an issue (English is her strength - near perfect SAT CR). HS requires govt. and Econ senior year and she’s in AP for both. Also, she needs her 4th math (Prob and Stats). They didn’t have French 3 at the private school she went to last year (should’ve insisted she stay there but they had few APs and she elected to return to large public) so she is taking that as well. Third year of language isn’t required for graduation, but is required if she decides to go to our in-state college option. I am going to see if she can take French in the summer. </p>
<p>@Overtheedge I wonder if a tutor for her toughest APs might be good – one-on-one she can learn the material much faster and easier than on her own.</p>
<p>@collegetime - I have hired a Bio tutor . To clarify, AP Bio is a 2 credit course so she is finishing 1 credit and has withdrawn from the other. I need to find an Econ tutor quickly! The rest she can learn pretty well on her own.</p>
<p>THANK YOU everyone for being so helpful and giving me a venue for my stress. I hesitated to post some of this info on a public site, but I’m glad I did. I am trying to keep it together to help D, and frankly, I was losing it. </p>
<p>@Overtheedge - Hugs to you and your DD. So glad you’ve got the Bio tutor and hopefully the other will happen quickly. I know nothing about 504s but it sounds like you’re a strong advocate for your DD and I hope it all works out okay. It does seem so crazy that a student at your DD’s level would be in danger of not graduating. And this is a great place to post to reduce stress while we’re trying to keep it together for our children. Best wishes and best of luck to both of you!</p>
<p>@Overtheedge, oh I feel for you but your daughter has a wonderful mom who is taking good care of her! </p>
<p>@dad2018, ummmm Cornell is not really what most people think of when they think of NY. Their motto is “Ithaca is Gorges.” It’s a really pretty area but we havent seen spring yet so everything isn’t at peak. Enjoy! I’m still just dumbfounded that the Ivy for us was more expensive than all other top privates and UNC OOS. They sure made us believe otherwise. </p>
<p>@AsleepAtTheWheel, thanks thanks thanks for the info! </p>
<p>Today a co-worker told me her S’s (class of 2015) list of colleges. All top 20. Ahem, you need some matches and safeties I said. She’s not getting it yet. He got a 34 on the SAT. Yep, excellent but I’ve got some work to do w her. </p>
<p>@overtheedge: I encourage you to call any colleges that are in final consideration. We did this when my son was still sick halfway through senior year. Most of them were extremely accomodating. You may also want to look into their policies if she has health issues next year. Their responses could influence her choice. Better to know upfront than have to figure it out if something does go wrong.</p>
<p>Agree completely with @3tallblonds
“@dad2018, ummmm Cornell is not really what most people think of when they think of NY. Their motto is “Ithaca is Gorges.” It’s a really pretty area…”</p>
<p>I remember being shocked the first time we drove up to Ithaca. I could not believe that NY was that large and went on for that many hours of driving.</p>
<p>@Overtheedge – While I have no personal reference, or helpful advice, my thoughts are with you and D – I agree with others that your best course is to hold firm with the school, and demand accomodation. Enlist her doctors for medical confirmation of the issues, and push, push, push until they work with you. Also, it may be worthwhile to google the education code for your state (as well as federal). I’ve often found if you know your rights, you can fight more successfully. (Like when the public middle school GATE teacher told students that they could not opt out of the uniform policy and be in GATE or AVID – 100% against the law to withhold educational opportunities for someone who legally opted out of wearing uniforms – a simple reference to the code worked wonders)</p>
<p>Best of luck, and warm wishes that she is on the mend, and celebrating graduation soon!</p>
<p>After an email to the FA office Tuesday, D’s FA package was posted late this afternoon and it is pretty poor compared to what she got from other schools. In fact, it is so much lower that we canceled the accepted student day on Saturday. Our net COA out-of-pocket for her is in the $34K range whereas the figures for Elon and VIllanova are in the $16 - $17K range and are affordable given that we just reallocate her HS tuition. We have two in school next year and there is absolutely no way to swing $34K. That scares me because S-2011 will graduate from Georgetown next year and that tuition number will come off of our expenses so the out of pocket at Lehigh could jump considerably in the next three years. I hate the numbers part of this entire process. Grrr…</p>
<p>I will call their FA office tomorrow to see if they made an error or if they are just being stingy with their FA. We weren’t even close to their average package as listed in their Common Data Set. Grrr…</p>