I joined a sorority in college. It was for social reasons, but there have been a lot more benefits over the years. In fact, tonight I’m having dinner with a group of 12 sisters, three coming from out of state, and then going to a football game tomorrow. My children’s godmothers are sorority sisters. When I’ve moved to other states, the alum group can be a good resource for making friends and contacts.
My father joined his fraternity 60+ years ago. Next week he’s going to visit a group of them who all have retirement homes near each other on Cape Cod. The have raised their families together, have been through good times and bad, and have been, obviously, life long friends. The fraternity also gave my kids and my nieces and nephews scholarships.
D also has joined a sorority and is very happy with her choice and her sisters. She was just elected ritual chair for the next year beginning with spring semester when her school has campus wide rush for the week before classes begin in January. Her school doesn’t have sorority houses as Pennsylvania has an obscure law that prevents more than 6 women living in the same house as it is deemed a “brothel” under the old state law. X( In addition to the social side of school life they also participate in many service projects in the local community.
Ten days until D comes home for Thanksgiving break. I haven’t seen her since she went back to school in August and miss her so much. I can hardly wait.
D joined a sorority too and has been very happy with her choice.
@AvonHSDad - I’ve never heard of that law regarding the brothel. There must be some way around it because my sorority had a house at a college in PA.
If I remember accurately from law school, those “brothel laws” are a myth. There are regulations that limit the number of unrelated people living together in a dwelling meant for a single family, but none that are gender specific. And even if it existed, it would be unenforceable because of the obvious gender discrimination.
Yeah, I’ve live in PA most of my life, and while it has some weird, arcane laws still on the books (See: “Blue Laws,” and anything related to alcohol purchases!), this “Brothel Law” is a myth:
Is it normal to send sensitive info like social security numbers, w2s, copies of driver license via email when leasing an apartment? D is in the process of leasing one. The landlord prefers emailing. A couple of D’s friends have had him as their landlord for a couple of years. Am I being paranoid to worry about this?
Is the SSN needed for credit check? Just curious. I have a freeze on my credit, making it impossible for anyone to run a credit check w/o me first contacting the appropriate agency and paying to unfreeze the report. My son rented an apt but has only needed money so far!
@worrytoomuch - I don’t know, to be honest! I actually wondered the same myself when he signed a lease last month. Of course, if I recall from the lease, a chunk of the rent is paid before the lease even begins. 12 month lease starting end of May, and I think I have to pay the first rent check at Thanksgiving.
My parents had to co-sign on my first Manhattan apartment, and I had already been out of college two years at that time.
@2014novamom and @LucietheLakie - Thanks for clearing that up. I just passed along the story as she related it. There must be something in that county or borough that has kept the sororities from having a house. Perhaps it is just the university controlling the housing situation. She is probably just as well off in her dorm.
So, just got a text from DD saying that she and her friends have decided to get an apartment for the next school year, but she is in charge for some reason and is very stressed out. She’s going to call later to talk to me about it, but it’s been so very long since I’ve been in the rental market that I don’t know how good my advice will be. I do know that she can’t be the only name on the lease. They have a place picked out, close to campus, furnished, but YIKES is it expensive. (College town rents vs. depressed small town rents!)
It’s her dime, though, and she is good with money so I trust that it will fit her budget.
@mdcmom, I don’t have a lot of experience in this area, but does she know the current tenants? I’d want to know how responsive the landlord is to addressing any issues that might come up.
Questions for the landlord:
How is pest control handled?
What is protocol for disputes with neighbors? (Loud noises, barking dogs, etc.) Does the landlord handle? Do the tenets have to work it out themselves?
How does one reach maintenance? What situations are considered a maintenance emergency?
What utilities are included?
If utilities are not included, you need to figure out how to handle those. Even if each roommate takes a bill, it’s unlikely all will equal. And each roommate should have her name on a different bill so that responsibility is really shared.
Every person living on the premises must be on the lease.
How is rent paid? Does one person have to collect from everyone and sent in one check/electronic transfer? Can each person on the lease pay directly and separately to the landlord?
is everybody’s DC coming home for Thanksgiving? DS will be here tomorrow, for the first time in 11 months, and I’m so excited and happy! He went on radio silence a few weeks ago (but he would respond when I texted for “proof of life”), as a couple of classes this term “kicked his butt” (in his words) and he was spending a lot of time studying (and, I’m sure, stressing). But this morning when his last final was done, he texted, I called him, and it was like my old DS was back. He was happy and relaxed, and that was so nice to hear! Can’t wait until tomorrow; he’ll be here for over a month. Lots to talk about as there seems to be a new romantic interest (but I have no details because he’s been so silent (actually that may be part of the reason for the lack of communication. …), but now he seems ready to talk. We’ll see!).
DS will be home Wednesday evening but not sure how much of him I’ll see other than Thanksgiving day. Friday he has an alumni game for his fall sport (the spring sport holds its alumni game over winter break) and I’m sure he already has plans for Friday night. Saturday he is driving down to UVA with some friends for the football game. And then he leaves Sunday afternoon.
But I see him on a fairly regular basis in the fall at his games (DH and I split the games so someone is always at one). I see him less regularly second semester but I will visit at least once for Mom’s Weekend at his fraternity. We also text regularly when it’s not finals week.
@Sweetbeet – that’s an interesting academic calendar. So their term ends at Thanksgiving, and then they go back right after Christmas? DS will be home for about 4 weeks over winter break but it doesn’t start until mid-December.