Parents of the HS Class of 2015

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ito5ELbyyxs Micheal Jackson “You Are Not Alone” This too.

Ack! You all have me tearing up here! You all are a wonderful group of people.

@shoboemom, I truly believe what SOG says about how your D will feel in October. You have done nothing but your best through this long and sometimes rough process. You have been involved and helped her along every step of the way, and that was invaluable. We were in the same spot as you throughout. Finances played a big role in the final decision. My D was admitted to some lovely schools that came off the list of possibilities once we saw the FA package. There were several schools like that. Albert summed it up quite nicely: Don’t feel guilty about the college she is going to. Going to college at all is an opportunity and a gift. For her to be able to go with your help and guidance without incurring debt is a lot to be thankful for.

I’m sorry to hear about your mom. I’m starting down that path right now with my mother now, although more toward the beginning. There is a whole lot of stress involved with that as well, and I’m sorry for the timing for you.

Hang in there, mama. You’re doing a great job, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now.

@Mugglemom: Congratulations to you and your S!! I am so glad Olin offers a true wait list opportunity! It seems pretty wOw! Good luck to him in possibly getting in for 2019, or just finding a fabulous placement for his gap year.

Am I the only one excited and thrilled beyond all hope and belief that D1 is finishing HS, starting college, and leaving her mother’s house? That the years and years and years of bitter acrimonious litigation are OVER and DONE, once and for all? I haven’t been this excited since she was born! There is NOTHING sad about her growing up! It’s what I have worked and waited for her whole life!

I’m with you, FCCDAD. I’ve raised a wonderful daughter and I’m ready to see where life takes her.

Also, I’m ready to make some major changes and it will be easier with her in college.

Thank you all for your support and understanding. It really does help to just be able to express it and hear a few supportive words. :x

I am excited for the next phase of my daughter’s life, but it helps that I am also moving into a new phase of life. I love having things to look forward to!

@singermom4 Those cakes look scrumptious. I vote for the Opera Cake.

@shoboemom Having gone through this process with multiple kids, I can assure you that once your daughter is at her new school and is meeting new friends, any thoughts of schools-that-could-have-been will vanish.

@shoboemom, hugs to you. I know those days so well and I completely understand. I have these unexpected moments when the reality of the next step hits and I tear up too. Do not beat yourself up about the school choices. You have worked closely with your daughter from the start and as much as you both would like things to be different, sometimes things are what they are and there’s nothing we can do about it. I hate that money comes into our decision making in college choices but it always does–and how can it not? What I have seen is that you have a close relationship with your daughter and she knows how much you care for her and for her future and you’ve worked hard to get her to the best place you can. I predict that you will both be happy when she’s settled into her school next year. I’m also sorry about your mom. I know how enormously sad that feels too. Luckily, these feelings come and go. Tomorrow will feel brighter.

And @SomeOldGuy, that Randy Newman song sends me into a crying jag every time. My older girls are roughly the same as Andy and Toy Story 3 left me a completely weepy mess.

@shoboemom - sorry to hear about all you are going through. I can empathize with that feeling of responsibility on how we directed our children but there are still many forks in the road ahead - this is the beginning not the end and every option has many possibilities. No way can we foretell that one option was definitely going to be better than another.

I think it’s better not to hold it together and just let it out. I was completely in knots yesterday trying to do that so friom last night until this morning I just let the tears flow - even when I was talking with an admission rep this morning (thank goodness I wasn’t sobbing!) - it all just spilled out beyond my control. For me, I don’t think it was all about stress or sadness - just that I had to let my breath out in some way - been holding it for over a year now. I feel so much better. Okay, the cake helped too :slight_smile:

@green678 - The bakery makes mini versions of their cakes. Just dug into the blackberry with chocolate - divine!

Shoboemom I understand where you are coming from but I promise you that these feelings of sadness do not last. Ii will not lie- dropping them off is not easy- but after a few weeks you will get used to this " new normal" and adjust. It will be easier once you see that your daughter is happy. The issue is that we are used to a lot of activity- study groups, school functions, etc and then " poof"… It’s gone in an instant. It takes awhile to get used to it. There are going to be times here and there when you get teary eyed- like when you see kids playing or getting off a school bus. To this day there are certain songs that still make me cry. As far as the college that your D is going to, she seems to be happy and I am sure she will flourish. I understand the guilt- I really do- but trust that the system works and your D will thrive. Some of my daughter’s top choices were cut due to finances, and some I would not let her apply to at all. I am sorry to hear about your mother- it’s very difficult to deal with these issues and adjust to a child going off to college. Life is not always easy, but lately I am really trying to take it one day at a time and appreciate these last few months. Its sad to see them go, but that’s what is supposed to happen. And as my neighbor recently said about her kids…they’re baaaack!

I’m super sad about DS leaving but as long as he’s going I’m ready for DD to go too and to get on with the next phase of my life - empty nesters. Unfortunately, that won’t be for a couple more years, if ever :slight_smile:

I’m going to be a newlywed this fall, so that will help ease me through the pain of having my baby go away!

We are going to be empty nesters. This is our youngest. She has FINALLY accepted her spot at Yale last night, but taking a gap year to study in Germany for a year.
When her brother left for college two years ago, I became an emotional mess. Never expected this, his college was everything we have ever dreamed for, I always wanted my kids to study out of state or even abroad, he got a full ride at a top school - it did not matter. I could not pass by his room without tearing up. It was like a part of me has died, I truly grieved. So I am bracing myself now for the departure of my youngest…and I know it will be tough ! I am young (I think), I am in my mid 40’s, I have friends with kindergartners…I guess I will turn into gardening :wink:

I . . . uhhhhhhh . . . could loan you a dog – particularly around 5:45 tomorrow morning.

(And congrats on your D’s decision! That’s really terrific.)

We will be empty nesters. I am not looking forward to it, but I try to talk myself into how exciting it will be to do some new things with my life. I’m sure I will get used to it. My sister in law described it as going 90 miles an hour into a brick wall. It all ends so abruptly (though we have plenty of warning.) My D doesn’t graduate until June 26th, she just started her last quarter. I purchased her last AP review books last week. That’s not a bad thing!

@SomeOldGuy - thanks! As for a dog - I already have one :slight_smile: And you will be an empty nester too…looking forward to it?
@VMT - what a nice comparison, there is really something about that total halt. I am looking right now at my vast library, plenty of books I purchased with an intention to read them later… :wink:

I lack foresight and have been focused more on the here and now. There are five or six weeks worth of nice capstone events ahead, assuming the kid lives through his AP exams. In our case, at least SomeMuchYoungerGal and I will be able to visit both boys with one road trip once the older one returns from studying abroad next fall. And I did sign up for a “destination” half-marathon I’ve always wanted to do but conflicts with the high school XC season.

I sobbed through Toy Story 3 as well, just thinking about 5 years down the road!! I’m not sure my D’20 is ready to have our complete and undivided attention after her brother leaves…it will definitely be interesting.

S’s last orchestra concert, at which he will be playing a solo violin piece (senior privilege), is this Sunday. Fortunately, I don’t have to accompany him on the piano as I usually do since there is a faculty member who will do it. This concert is the first of the “lasts,” and I know I will sob through all of it, even the crazy awards the conductor presents at the end to the seniors. His 18th birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks, too…yowza.

I am so very excited for him, though – I feel confident that he is going to be in exactly the right program and has an incredible future ahead of him. No regrets there at all.