<p>checking in regarding S. We are finally figuring out what he is upset about. Former GF has a new BF who is telling S to stay away from her. Threats have been made twice. S went out with this GF for 18 months and the group of friends they hung out with is kind of divided by this whole thing. He insists he does not want to go back to this school. We are upset and so confused as to how to handle this. We are telling him he cannot let the bully win and that leaving will do that. And I am concerned as to how transferring mid junior year would affect his transcript. He is captain of the the XC team and was just named class rep of NHS. Plus, through social media, people at other schools as well as his school have heard that he is leaving his school. All it would take is a day at the new school and everyone would know why he left. This is heartbreaking and so hard to navigate!<br>
Meeting with his school counselor this morning to try to figure something out. He will be going with us and he is not happy about that at all. Wish me luck!</p>
<p>I don’t think you should be allowed to have a “college fair” unless you serve cotton candy and funnel cakes.</p>
<p>WoW, 400 schools in a mall! I’d run the other way, too. </p>
<p>We have several types of college fairs and school visit options in little ol’ Minneapolis. We have the college fair put on by [NACAC</a> National College Fairs](<a href=“http://www.nacacnet.org/college-fairs/Pages/default.aspx]NACAC”>http://www.nacacnet.org/college-fairs/Pages/default.aspx) at our convention center. It’s well organized and spacious. I’m not certain how many schools participated this year, but many of the schools on BHG’s list were present. She attends this fair during the school day with her school, and we return in the evening as it’s less crowded since every school within 2 hours of the Twin Cities brings in busloads of students. If the school preregisters each student, the student gets a barcode with all their information, interests, and etc. that the adcoms scan when a student visits their booth–no interest cards to fill out.</p>
<p>Next, the CTCL [CTCL</a> Programs & Information | Colleges That Change Lives](<a href=“http://www.ctcl.org/events/programs]CTCL”>College Fairs & Information Sessions – Colleges That Change Lives) schools host a fair each August at one of the Twin Cities event centers. BHG never had a problem getting to each school’s table to “show face”. You only have to complete one interest card and then check off any of the 40 CTCL schools of interest. </p>
<p>Every year our school is invited to smaller fairs consisting of IVY and top 40ish schools. These events usually only have 4-8 schools participating.</p>
<p>Then there are alumni events in private homes or small venues by invitation only for a specific school. To get invites to these, register through the college or via the adcom when he/she visit a student’s school. BHG attends every event that she can, and many schools have different alumni host several events throughout the year. For example, one visit to an event featured the Assistant Dean of Admissions who gave a broad overview of the school and it’s offerings. Another event for the same school went into more detail of major offerings, study abroad, and internships while a third event focused mainly on campus life. </p>
<p>And finally, about 60 schools visit BHG’s school campus each fall. The GC is trying to get adcom visits during May & June, too.</p>
<p>Wrights, I am so sorry about what your son and family is going through. I hope the school counselor and your family can formulate a plan to, at the least, address the inschool situation. Positive thoughts, too, regarding the group of friends situation. I know when one of BHG’s friends went through a similar situation this summer, the kids set up group outings sans the “new” couple just so the one who broke up did not feel out of the friendship loop. This particular girlfriend greatly appreciated this, and joined back fully in all activities this fall. The new girlfriend is still a bit mean, but cordial now that the former girlfriend is totally over the BF and showing indifference to the whole situation.</p>
<p>It will get easier for your son as he slowly heals his wounded heart.</p>
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<p>The venue that hosts the NACAC college fair in our metro area sells cotton candy, snow cones/cups and mini donuts!</p>
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<p>I’m working with BHG on a similar strategy, but looking at schools in the Northeast, Mid-Atlantic and near specific southern metropolitan areas. </p>
<p>Since your D has really good stats, seek out Midwest schools that offer excellent merit aid. I defiantly would zero in on the CTCL schools for this. Like the southern schools, there are several midwest Us that provide merit aid to students with excellent gpas and board scores. Check out the flagships in Ohio, Indiana, and Minnesota. Also, the COA to attend U of MN and the U of WI is less than $30K & $35K per year without looking at possible scholarships for OOS students. I think MN waives the OOS fee, which is only about $4K-$5k higher than instate. </p>
<p>The OOS COA for U of Kansas is about $32K, too, and I know they have specific waivers for high stat kids off tuition that brings tuition and fees down to about $13K per year or less. They also offer a tuition guarantee that locks in tuition rates for four years, which saves money where other public schools increase tuition by an average of 3.4% per year after adjustments. The school is ranked lower than U of MN and U of WI, but offers a honors college, a beautiful campus, and is located in a wonderful college town (suburbia) that is ranked in the top 3 most liberal towns in America along with Berkeley, CA and Ann Harbor, MI.</p>
<p>Thx BHM for all the info!! If I can be of assistance please let me know- ( NY and surrounding areas).</p>
<p>Wrights I am sorry to hear about these issues. Hopefully the school will provide you with some guidance.</p>
<p>Wrights, I’m happy you’re all meeting with the counselor and I hope it’s a good meeting. Does your son trust this person? It makes sense that he’s been so thrown by this. 18 months is a looong time in the life of a teen and relationships at that age are very intense. My nephew was devastated when as a freshman in college his GF started a new relationship. He traveled to visit her at her school only to discover that she was involved with someone else. He was truly depressed and that beginning of freshman year was rough for him. The good news is that he adjusted and soared. </p>
<p>Do you have any sense that he is being bullied? That’s the one thing he can’t control and which can have serious effects. </p>
<p>If he really did need to transfer schools, there are ways to work it out. I wouldn’t worry at all about damage to his transcript. I just hope that he starts to heal and is able to move on and hugs to you–I know how hard it hurts when our kids are in pain.</p>
<p>I agree with 3girls3cats: *If he really did need to transfer schools, there are ways to work it out. I wouldn’t worry at all about damage to his transcript. I just hope that he starts to heal and is able to move on and hugs to you–I know how hard it hurts when our kids are in pain. *</p>
<p>I’m really hoping the school counselor can help today.</p>
<p>SOG, imagine how crowded a college fair would be if they did offer those yummies! My D would skip the booths and head right for the cotton candy. I don’t think she’d be alone in that either. </p>
<p>Twogirls, the geographic preferences work against those of us on the west coast too. Even though we are very far from NY, the relative lack of colleges around here (apart from the UCs) drive many, many Californians to look eastward. We also end up being overrepresented.</p>
<p>wrights1994,</p>
<p>that’s horrible what your son is going through in school. Hopefully, the school has a way to deal with bullying. Good luck with the GC meeting.</p>
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<p>Wow wrights, what a tough situation! I hope the GC can help your family figure out a solution to this. Best of luck with the meeting.</p>
<p>My Ds’ school has a college fair every spring. There is a keynote speaker (for the parents, mostly) and some more private meetings with admissions officers in addition to a gym full of tables. No cotton candy, though.</p>
<p>I think standing on the second floor of the mall, overlooking the throng below and saying “All these people! There’s more people here than number of students at your target colleges!” may not have been the best thing to say to D. She hates crowds. She’s looking at schools with around 2000 students. There was easily 3000+ people there.</p>
<p>Alas, no cotton candy or funnel cakes. Starbucks and Caribou coffee were still open.</p>
<p>My D’s school had a college fair two weeks ago. She didn’t go. There was drawings for “scholarship”. 3 kids got “scholarship” $200 or something like that, by random drawing.</p>
<p>wrights - this is clearly bullying and intimidation. The HS counselor should be encouraged to take it seriously and the school needs to meet its responsibility to create a safe learning environment for your son. Good luck at the meeting!</p>
<p>3girls --</p>
<p>You are right about being over-represented from CA. I tried not to wince as last week 2 adcoms told me and D how CA is their most represented state (and these schools were both EC LACs). Definitely not a plus to apply from here, even with a 5 hour flight. </p>
<p>Wrights --</p>
<p>So sorry your son has to go through all of this. I hope the school counselor can help.</p>
<p>My friend’s daughter is a current high school junior and has fallen in love with Middlebury because of its strong language program. She’s a smart, hard working girl with lots of strong extra curriculuars, part-time job and excellent grades in AP and honors classes in a competitive public high school in Pennsylvania. She’s probably well qualified for a school like Middlebury but can’t afford it. The family is looking for suggestions for schools like Middlebury but not as expensive! I don’t know what type of Financial Aid they may qualify for (father is self-employed); she may qualify for merit aid based on her stats at a less selective school than Middlebury.</p>
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<p>I believe Middlebury meets 100% of need, so if she qualifies for FA there she should get it.</p>
<p>I don’t know what specific languages she’s into but Earlham offers great merit and need-based FA and is well known for languages and study abroad, especially Japanese/Japan.</p>