<p>Heli I am so sorry you’re having a rough time! So many peer groups - so much peer pressure! Sometimes I think hanging out on CC causes more trouble than its worth - you start to read about all these kids taking a boatload of AP courses and naturally you think your kid must as well. Or your social set in your community is filled with people whose self worth is riding on their kid’s college acceptances. Or your daughter has friends that are bragging about Ivy applications. And then there are the colleges using their expensive advertising techniques to convince your child that they must apply. Cue Billy Joel singing PRESSURE! </p>
<p>Time to step back and remind daughter that you and her dad and siblings if she has them, are a team and your goal is to produce a happy and productive member of society and that you are all in it together - and everyone has a different path to the goal. Sounds like you and your daughter have a great relationship and I’m glad you could talk it out! </p>
<p>And get off CC right now and go watch American Idol - it’ so good this year! Harry Connick :x </p>
<p>Heli…here’s the thing…you wrote that you expressed concern over her very demanding schedule. If you were “that” mom, you never would have done such a thing. By you expressing your concern, you opened the door for her to be honest and express her concern. Don’t beat yourself up, it was a productive conversation that you initiated. And believe me, if you were “that” mom, she wouldn’t have said anything. You are doing it right.</p>
<p>Funny story about peer pressure. One of my neighbor’s tells us that her S hated hearing where everyone was applying and how wonderful their grades were…he is a great kid who played sports and maintained a B average. After awhile, whenever someone asked where he was applying/going he answered confidently “WCAM”.</p>
<p>She told us that people just went Ok and moved on. Of course, one of the moms asked, “What is WCAM? I’m unfamiliar with it.” She replied “Whatever college accepts me.”</p>
<p>By the way, he is a senior at Tulane (loves it). and has been offered a job upon graduation at an advertising firm in NY that he interns at during summers.</p>
<p>eerboco – thanks for the perspective. Your story of the boy who “only” took math & science APs goes along with what our counselors are saying: stretch yourself in those subjects that interest you the most. I think balance is important, especially in a year when kids end up spending large chunks of time writing essays for college apps. And I love the Tulane story as well!</p>
<p>I have been heavily hitting the like button on all of these posts - way to be there for Helimom! I heartily agree you are not “that mom”! </p>
<p>Meanwhile, I have to report on tonight’s activity - the Alabama “special reception”. Unfortunately, we were not impressed. And I really wanted to be impressed, that NM scholarship is so generous. But D’s exact words sum it up best: “They’re selling the experience, not the education.” And a big part of the Alabama experience is going to be about a big school - Greek life, football, etc and those things are not compelling to D. We were hoping the presenters would focus on the honors college to see if there was enough of a “school within a school” to make it worth a closer look. It was mentioned, but no specifics. Surprising, because I figured everyone there was invited based on their PSAT scores, and would likely be interested in that aspect of the school. </p>
<p>mom2two – was it a local Alabama thing? My D received a nice invitation to a “special reception” nearby and we haven’t decided if it’s worth her time (on a school night - ugh!) to go to the presentation. I was thinking it had to do with her PSAT scores as well and figured if they were coming all the way to the West Coast they would be playing up the honors college. If not, we probably should pass on the invite. Did they say anything that it made it worth your time or your D’s time?</p>
<p>Mamabear - yes, it was a local thing here. I googled it before we went, and there were some great recommendations on CC. Many said that Dr. Sharpe of the honors college was in attendance and liked to speak with NMFs. But that wasn’t the case tonight. Perhaps you can find out in advance who the speakers will be, and that can help you decide whether or not to attend.</p>
<p>Thanks so much for the head’s up! I really appreciate it. I will definitely try to get more info on it. We went to a bunch of local college receptions in the Fall, but really don’t have extra time to waste and Alabama isn’t really being considered at this point. I was wondering if the event might change things though. Hopefully I can find out who will be speaking that night!</p>
<p>Two girls: there may not be enough really good reasonably priced Cabernet to get me though next 18 months. WW doesn’t drink much but enjoys a nightly coffee laced with Baileys and what other coffee favored liqueur we happen to have in the house, topped with a generous helping of whipped cream…and she looks at me funny when I carry my wine glass around at the end of the night trying to wind down and sleep. </p>
<p>Though Ive recently found some very nice Malbacs & Shiraz’…we shoot for 90 points plus from the wine magazines. </p>
<p>LOL Threesdad, your post reminded me that I’d like to pick up some Carolan’s Irish Cream at the store, smoother than Bailey’s and a better price.
SomeOldGuy, we actually have a plush stuffed Bullwinkle holding a Wossamatta U flag sitting up in the attic, I should bring it down and tell D that’s the school where she’s headed
helimom74, this parenting stuff is tough–how to encourage them to do their best without pressuring them. It says a lot that your daughter was able to be honest with you! </p>
<p>Wossamatta U! I love it. When my youngest was 8 and my eldest was looking at colleges, an intense relative asked her what college she thought she might want to attend. Such an inappropriate question. Before I could intervene and without missing a beat, little D replied, “South Harmon Institute of Technology.” Admittedly, not a very appropriate answer, but SO PERFECT. The well-meaning but clueless and childless relative looked confused. It was a beautiful moment. </p>
<p>Threesdad I usually head over to the liquor store where I buy a $3.99 bottle of White Zinfandel. Sometimes I buy the $7.99 bottle ( more for your buck ). I am not a big drinker but I like to keep it in the house just in case I need it!!! </p>
<p>Last night I told her that after the ACT on Saturday we will have a " book shredding party." Her response was, " I can’t because I have to study for my tests." I guess I will bring my party hats with me in the car when I pick her up. :D/ </p>
<p>Last year some of the kids who had the English teacher from hell had a notebook burning party. I wonder if they will repeat that this summer with testing materials.</p>
<p>We got the Dec. ACT testing booklet with D’s answers in the mail yesterday. Interesting stuff. She got 3 wrong on the English and only got one point off. Reading curve wasn’t as generous. She went through the math section and found an arithmetic mistake, a question she didn’t notice said “at least”, and a question she has no idea why she got it wrong bc it’s so easy. She got 7 wrong on the science and still got a decent score. For $19, I guess it was worth getting this information. At the very least, we have a fresh test booklet to pass on to the younger kids if the test doesn’t change.</p>
<p>I think the curve on science must be generous because she did not finish- bubbled in “B” for the last four answers and still managed to do well. Reading was her lowest section. I am reading that there are schools that super score the ACT, although it sounds confusing because some say that they look at the highest section from each test but do not recalculate a new composite. </p>
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