Tree is still on the house. The Town won’t do anything about it. It’s so complicated. In other news there are only 4 more class days left
@readingclaygirl, there should be an executor named for the neighbor’s estate. Can they pay ongoing bills that occur? Surely they are paying property taxes and such. See if you might be able to pay for the tree removal and be reimbursed by them?
Feel better soon @BeeDAre & hope DD has a good trip.- Same for your DD @LexieAnn!
Yay for the summer job @mommdc - DS went to work today, although he has been working off an on for the last several weeks & it is the same job he had last summer- so not anything real new.
@readingclaygirl - enjoy the last few days of school & good luck to your family with the tree limb!
Thanks @bookmom7!
She really wanted this job. I’m so happy for her.
Thanks @bookmom7 @mommdc From what I understand, there was no will or anything and at the moment the estate is in the courts and will be for another 7 or 8 months. And apparently her son legally can’t do anything.
@readingclaygirl have your parents checked with their own homeowners insurance? If this were two cars that collided and their was any kind of insurance issues, each owner’s insurance would could cover their policy holder and then the insurance companies would fight it out.
I think that is what is going to happen. @Cheeringsection my dad has called our insurance company about 3 times, but they have to check with their legal people because it’s such a rare situation. I’ll keep you all updated. I think someone from the insurance company has to come and make sure there is no damage to our roof.
Is anyone here following the Stanford sexual assault sentencing news story? I am. We recently watched The Hunting Ground and read related media. I aim to read Missoula this summer. And, today I asked D16 to watch the Tea Consent video from England (Google it – very good). She needs to know more about consent, as the colleges are reporting that the majority of students don’t understand it at all.
I am following @dyiu13 . It’s very disturbing. Clearly not consensual when one party is unconscious . I have a friend whose daughter was date raped as a freshman . Unfortunately, she had to navigate the whole examination process alone because she was too embarrassed to tell her mother until 2 months later when her grades began to drop. Her family just assumed that she was having adjustment issues, until she finally disclosed . Her daughter found out later that this had happened twice before , but the girls were too embarrassed to tell anyone. My friend moved her daughter to another school , and she is now finishing up her masters in Clinical Counseling . I agree that these are discussions we need to be having with our kids ,no matter how uncomfortable …
I’m pretty new to CC but am interested to know how other people’s children, sons especially, are handling the imminent prospect of travelling far away to Uni for the first time. We are from Zimbabwe (in Africa) so I probably won’t see my son for a good 10 months or so. He seems very reserved and not at all open or excited about this huge move coming up although I know he really wants to go more than anything because he is the one who chose this path rather than going somewhere closer to home. He’s a very bubbly humorous kid but seems to not want to discuss anything at all about College. This is very difficult when there’s so much to organise!
@dyiu13 @carolinamom2boys - I am following that story, too! I saw the defendant on the news and I thought he deserved the six months just for chewing gum and rolling his eyes while sitting there. (!) But I’m not the sentencing judge, probably for the best. I couldn’t believe the father’s statement also, about how his son had been punished enough for “only twenty minutes” and the rapist’s statement that she enjoyed being penetrated with objects in the dirt while unconscious (!!!) But worst of all, I am thinking of my students who were rejected from his year in Stanford, and how much more they deserved a spot.
Has anyone else noticed that there is no official comment from the rapist’s mother?
Welcome, @zimmum! Wow, if your normally bubbly, humorous kid is reserved and closed off about this move, I would definitely worry about it too. If it continues, you might want to consult a third-party professional. Wish I could offer better advice.
@dyiu13, @carolinamom2boys, @fretfulmother, I agree that the Stanford rapist story is appalling. It provides an opportunity to talk to our college kids about rape on college campuses.
@carolinamom2boys In that family, she probably needs her husband’s permission to speak.
@zimmum My 2016 graduate is being pretty quiet about college (but she’s still finishing up school this week and doesn’t graduate until June 20). She goes for orientation next week so I’m hoping that gets her excited. The end of senior year has been a drag and she still has college placement tests which she pretty much has to do after school today. She’s not crossing an ocean, but she is going pretty far away (about 2/3 of the way across the country). If your son is still finishing up school or just finished, maybe give him a chance to switch gears.
We’ve been talking about Stanford story here too, with the added layer of privilege and race playing a part in how the media is portraying him verses, say Trayvon Martin. It’s of course opened the door to talk about consent and party behavior. But today is finals so D is only hearing some of this with half an ear right now. We will continue the conversation, however.
Welcome @zimmum . Is it possible your son is having second thoughts about going that far away or even going to college at all right now? ESPECIALLY since he drove the process, he might be thinking about how disappointed everyone will be if he doesn’t go. My older D was like that-moved right along with quietly packing, culling the stuff in her room, etc. as she prepared to leave for college, never seeming excited about it or wanting to discuss it. Turns out she wasn’t at all ready to leave, but thought we’d be angry about lost deposits and payments, all the time we’d taken on tours, etc. Hindsight being what it is, of course we wished we could have seen the signs and spoken up sooner.
Try sitting your son down in a quiet moment and ask if everything is ok, assuring him that nothing he tells you will make you stop wanting only the best for him, but that it’s HIS life. Ask leading questions, but don’t assume anything. He might be scared, or worried about you, or wanting to take a year off but doesn’t know how to articulate that. I hope he’s just nervous-assure him that everyone is nervous about huge life changes, but don’t force him to go if he’s changed his mind. That won’t end well.
We have graduation this week for D16. Then next week, we wave goodbye to D13 as she takes off for a summer adventure (3 hour summer course in her major). Note to self: get on the stick and make hotel reservations.
Wow–amazing sale on Southwest right now. (Limited days of the week though.) I wish we could know when finals would be over, I’d definitely fly D home for $49 instead of driving 10 hours each way to fetch her!
Edited to add: Alright, so YMMV. Looked at a few other routes and the deals weren’t quite as good. Hope someone finds something that works for them, but apologies if I got anyone’s hopes up and the price isn’t right.
@zimmum I have seen my DS being a bit overwhelmed by the whole graduation and preparing to leave process. He is excited when he talks about going but does not usually initiate that conversation. He avoided grad events that were known to be “emotional” and took a few days before he would open his gifts and cards. I thought we would watch him open them but he needed to do that privately. Maybe your son is trying to sort through it all. He may not know exactly what his overriding emotion is right now and just need time. It is especially hard for DS’s to express those emotions here in the U.S. I am guessing it may be the same there. Where is he headed? Maybe someone here can provide some insight to make all you more comfortable.
I just booked a room for move-in this August.
AND, booked for Commencement Weekend, for our older D, for next May. 70% of the rooms are already booked for that weekend, so no, definitely not too early! Hat tip to the smart organized parents on the 2013 forum!
I can’t decide whether to book a room for move-in or not. We’re only 2 1/2 hours away, so can easily drive there that day. I’m not sure if it’s a free-for-all, or if kids are assigned move-in times at this school.
My son is not normally bubbly or talkative so it’s hard to see if he’s acting differently - but he is definitely NOT excited about going to school. The more time spent with the new GF, the less he wants to contemplate life away from her. (And she’s a lovely person, so I can’t blame him!) I’m excited for registration this Friday - hopefully it will at least make it all seem more real. I just realized that my S has virtually never been away from home - not even for a night, I don’t believe. I’m would imagine the whole thing has him a little nervous.