^ What if your daughter does everything she is “supposed” to do and fails to get into an Ivy?
This is a likely possibility.
Yes, it is a likely possibility but in that event, at least she can say she gave it all she had and have no regrets or would
of’s, should of’s or could of’s. Failing to realize your goal is not the worst thing to happen. Not giving your all to something that is truly important to you is worse. Or more horrible, doing all you possibly can and then an error on transcripts, uploads, matching scores with correct files, etc. and not knowing at all or not knowing in time is probably the worst thing that any student could go through. Sure mistakes happen but when they happen in a situation that is maybe one of the most important they have encountered so far…that is a bitter pill to swallow. Failing to attain your goals will happen over and over again in life. It’s a learning experience…it teachers resilience and perseverance. Those are important qualities to have in this world.
Welcom @ivmjac1 !
@lvmjac1 - Too late to help the DC16s, but the best book about managing high perfoming kids aiming for college is How to Be a High School Superstar by Cal Newport (he also blogs), imho. Excellent.
Btw, our. 3-person family does a “calendar sync” meeting each Sunday. Keeps us on track, helps us make decisions about what to add or let go, how to collaborate for some commitments or goals. How do you all do it?
Welcome @lvmjac1 !
Calendar sync?!? None of that here. DS manages his own schedule now that he drives. DH and I coordinate getting DD where she needs to be but I am the default.
@Ballerina2016, we are in the same boat, S is studying and doing hw. I told the kids in my class that our next quiz will not be until after the SAT.
@dyiu13, we didn’t save for college either because there were affordable here in Ca.when S was born and I never thought I would have a kid who would go to anything more than a Cal State, which are still pretty affordable. So what wife and I did is we downgraded our home and now our mortgage is $1000 less than it was before. That frees up $12,000 for college. I also paid off the cars, so that is an extra $600/month I can put towards college. I can do this and still put money into my retirement.
Reading about staying in top 10%, Sal, Val etc…S has all A’s but this year the music teacher has decided to make his class harder than any of S AP classes. ugh, we don’t need this right now.When S told teacher that he had always been an A student in music and that this very teacher had always given him A’s and that he was worried about his Val being in danger the teacher said, “Why are you even bringing that up?”
Now that it’s looking like all systems go for our D16’s dream school as a residential student, it’s getting a bit exciting, rather than just stressful. While her list includes colleges on both coasts and in the middle of the country, her desired top-choice school is about an hour and change drive from home. While I was completely prepared for her to live far away and see her only for winter and summer breaks, now I squealing inside with delight that she’s in striking distance should I (or she) want in-person visits. I could take her to lunch. She could come home for an overnight. She could easily continue in her local sport. She and her dad could hit the comicon. And she could see her usual doctors. Squee!
Welcome @lvmjac1 and congrats to those with acceptances rolling in and apps submitted. We’re missing senior college night at the high school tonight because D has so much homework! How rich is that?
I have my college interview tomorrow morning. And tonight I was a student guide at Meet the Teacher Night. My mom got all emotional because it was her last one.
Today I have an appointment with GC. Each family is granted only one meeting with GC regarding college application. We will see what happens.
Welcome @lvmjac1.
^^Whhhaaat!!!??? One meeting?
@Mysonsdad – Well, I hope you use your one meeting to teach him a bunch of stuff.
@NYDad513 - Good luck! As long as the GC does a smart recommendation/school profile and stewards all school focus like LORs and transcripts, it’ll be fine. You and your daughter (and the CC hive) can/will handle all the rest.
@NYDad513 No One on one meetings with GC at DD school. Not that I complain. I think GC should use the same motto as medical professionals: do not harm. Speaking of which I am still trying to have GC to send her part of NMSF package.
@Mysonsdad @dyiu13 @Ballerina2016 Counseling Department at my DD’s school does very good job in terms of college applications. School is very dedicated and they constantly remind students along with parents of deadlines and other stuff. Because most parents wants to meet GC, school made limitation for meeting with parents. Students are always welcome to talk. I will plan to discuss what should be included in GC letter to characterize my daughter.
This year, 62 out of 190 students made NMSF at my daughter’s school, lower number compared to previous few years. Anyway, I think it is very hard GC forget their part if many students are applying. @Ballerina2016 Hope your GC does her job in time.
Got my Dads mixed up.
@NYDad513 – Teach the GC some of what you’ve learned on this thread.
Our schools doesn’t do formal parent one on ones but you can request one if you like.
They do require that students submit an information sheet and resume and parents have to summit a form too, that way they have something to refer to when writing recommendations. DH and I worked on the form together some of those questions aren’t as easy as they look!
Here’s the student question’s:
Answer the following questions as thoroughly as possible; use additional sheets if necessary. Your counselor will use this information when writing your recommendation and reserves the right to use this material to best represent you. Please write in complete sentences.
- What two or three (academic & personal) accomplishments are you most proud of and why?
- What do you see as your greatest academic strengths? Weaknesses? Give specific examples.
- Of all the classes you have taken in high school, which have you enjoyed most and why?
- Which class has been the most difficult for you and why did you take it?
- What do you see as your greatest personal strengths? Weaknesses? Give specific examples.
- List three adjectives you would use to describe yourself and explain why.
- List two adjectives your friends would use to describe you and explain why.
- List at least two teachers or staff members who know you well and who can speak confidently about your academic ability. What adjectives do you think each would use to describe you? Why?
- Discuss anything else that you consider special or unique about yourself, something that might not otherwise be known about you.
Here are the parents questions:
- What do you consider to be your child’s outstanding accomplishments during the past three or four years? Why did you select these as most important?
- In what areas has your child shown the most development and growth during the past three or four years?
- What do you consider to be his/her outstanding personality traits? Describe situations in which these qualities were evident.
- Describe your child in five adjectives. Please include an example to illustrate each one.
- Based on your observations over the last three years, what classes has your son or daughter enjoyed most? Least? What does that say about his/her approach to learning?
- Describe an activity (school, community, athletic, extracurricular) to which he/she has devoted extensive time and effort during the last two years. What do you think was gained from participation in this activity?
- Describe a particular challenge or disappointment which your son/daughter has handled effectively.
- Are there any other unusual circumstances that have affected your child’s educational or personal accomplishments? If so, please explain.
- Please list specific colleges your child is considering attending. What can he/she contribute to the college if selected for admission?
- Please tell us anything else about your son or daughter that you think we need to know.
Optional Personal Information: Admission to college and offers of financial aid may be affected by family circumstances and financial need. Please describe any family circumstances, personal issues or financial concerns you wish to share. This information will be kept confidential.
@Mysonsdad , you are awesome.
@3scoutsmom our school does something very similar. Seniors needing a LOR from GC have to complete a lengthy packet of questions (includes parent portion) before meeting with GC.