@mstomper, I’ve noticed you are looking at Temple for your S. My D is applying too due to the full tuition scholarhsip. She missed the National Merit cut-off by 2, but even so I think Temple would be her first choice for a financial safety. The more we research about Temple and it’s honors college, the better the fit seems.
@palm715, I hope it works out for him to go to Temple. The key is whether they weight his GPA close to the way his high school has. His unweighted is 3.35, but weighted it’s 4.0. It’s not really affordable without the full tuition. He hasn’t visited yet, but I’m guessing he’ll like it.
Yeah, I goofed! It should have been directed at @waiting2exhale . Never post while under the influence of pain meds. Twice.
:wanders off, mumbling about multi-day sinus headaches:
So DS has his first acceptance–his dad’s alma mater, in a neighboring state. It’s his safety, and with his stats they are supposed to give him in state tuition, but they haven’t given us the award yet. So it doesn’t feel like an acceptance yet.
Hes working on the activities section of the Common App, and whoever described it as haiku was exactly right.
Well, this week was decision time at our house. It was at times painful.
Over the past month S16 had been to an overnight sports ‘recruiting weekend’ at two great highly-selective schools. They’re both Division 3 schools, where sports recruiting basically means that you can leverage your sport into an admission. He has the academics to get into both of these schools even without his sport, but so do many many wonderful applicants who will get rejected. And part of the deal is that for the coach to be able to tip the scales to get the kid admitted, that kid needs to apply binding early decision. So basically S16 had to make a binding choice about where he wanted to go to school.
We all started by saying that there was no bad choice here. But both parents preferred one school, and S16 preferred the other. We had an official discussion several nights ago, and it was painful when we pushed the school we preferred and when we made S16 articulate why, beyond “I loved it there”, he preferred the other school.
As an aside, the current club coaches all tell the kids that it has to be about the school and not about the sport/team, i.e., that you may find yourself no longer on the team in a couple of years (injury, workload, etc.), but you’ll still be at the school. That said, we were concerned that for our son it WAS more about which school’s coach/team he preferred, and we pushed hard for him to go beyond that.
That first discussion ended without any real conclusion, and we all let it rest for a couple of days.
By the time we reconvened a couple of nights later my wife and I realized that he’d truly had that epiphany of “this is the school where I want to be”, and that based on the differences between the schools (and the kids that are there) S16 was making a good choice. Put another way, his criteria were better criteria than ours. The three of us kicked it around a bit more, and then we told him that we’re behind him 100% in his choice. He’s thrilled, and so are we. He emailed the coach that night.
There are still a few minor details to take care of. He needs to finish his common app essay and the common app itself. He needs to write the supplemental essay. Then he needs to submit his application.
Finally, despite the coach’s assurances it’s definitely not over until it’s over, until the acceptance is in hand. But some of the big steps have been taken.
We offered to take him out to dinner tonight to celebrate his decision. He said, “Nah. I’m going to tonight’s girls’ volleyball game and then out to dinner with some friends.” With him having made this decision and with him gone from the house tonight it is abundantly clear that we’ll be empty-nesters next year. Thank heavens we have each other and the puppy.
Congrats @AsleepAtTheWheel . Isn’t it hard when our kids make the right decision without us. Fit is everything.
@AsleepAtTheWheel congrats on reaching a decision. Your son sounds smart and thoughtful, a great combination.
@AsleepAtTheWheel That is great that your son has made a decision about college.
Our son is currently being recruited for soccer. He submitted the Common App for early decision the other day. We should have a decision by December 15th. I hope the coach will talk to admissions and will let us know something. If not it is gonna be a long wait…
@carolinamom2boys – you’re very astute.
@Themommymommy – thanks for your kind words.
@allboyz – I’d hope that the coach can/will give you some clear indication of the way that it’s going. Good luck.
What’s notable to me is that for both my boys the most important aspect of ‘fit’ was the other kids at the school. Of course the list of schools was initially built with academic and other sorts of criteria, but ultimately size, location, campus, strength of specific academic depts, etc. were much less important than somehow being able to identify either kids who were there or kids who were going there as kids that they’d simply want to be around.
Emory was very smart when S14 and I attended one of their three ‘Admitted Students Days’. Very early in the day they split up the kids from their parents, and the first thing that the kids did was to attend an info session for their intended area of study. Right away my son, who sometimes struggles socially, met some kids that he liked, and they hung out together for the rest of the day. Prior to that we’d toured other schools and had done another admitted students weekend. But even though I thought that he’d find the kids at Emory a bit geeky (compared to some of the other schools on his list) he felt for the first time like he was in his element. It turned out to be a good choice for him.
I guess that the (?obvious) point that I’m trying to make is if the only campus visit was during the summer it might be worthwhile to do a visit with school in session (and lots of kids around) or even better yet an overnight visit (if it’s available) before making a final decision. I know for some kids/families that’s not practical right now (like if you’re in Alaska), but then those admitted students days might be a good idea come April.
I recognize that we have it easy, (hopefully) being done relatively early this go-around, With S14 we sweated out getting acceptances and rejections through March, and his decision wasn’t made until April 22nd – eight whole days before the deadline. So, for those who are in this for quite a bit longer, I’ll channel Bill Clinton by saying that I feel your pain. As I’ve written before it’s a wonderful community here on this thread.
Hearty congratulations, @AsleepAtTheWheel. Sounds like it was a good combination of head and heart that led to the decision, and kudos to supportive parents.
Congratulations to your S and your family, @AsleepAtTheWheel ! And kudos on raising a son who can make a well thought out decision, and advocate for himself in the face of equally well thought out opposition.
Congratulations to you and your S @AsleepAtTheWheel. As I have told you before, the area is beautiful.
@AsleepAtTheWheel It must be both a relief and still a little stressful to have a “decision” made at this point in senior year. I am very happy for you, your son, and your family (yes, family - it is a package deal, with all family members affected!)…and I hope everything falls into place. Please keep us informed as everything unfolds! At this point in the process, some of us are living vicariously through you. So happy for you!
Ooooh, so exciting! Can’t wait until the acceptance is in and you can tell us the “winner” @AsleepAtTheWheel !
Congrads @AsleepAtTheWheel! I hope it all goes smoothly from here!
Hoping for the best for your DS as well @allboyz.
I went through DS’s common ap recently and checked what is there. It all looks good thus far but the essays and other supplement answers still remain to be completed. I will try to be patient but it is getting harder. Hearing from his rolling admissions school would really help right now.
Again, thank you all for the kind words, the good wishes, and the excellent karma.
@AsleepAtTheWheel You are correct to stress that your S pick the school that is a better fit academically and every other way than sports. My S was recruited to play D3 lax and of the four or five schools he was actively being recruited to three of them the coaches moved to other schools within his recruitment time. At one he was asked by the coach to email him back which weekend he could go to his overnight and within the 2 days in between the coach’s email asking and my S’s response (which went unanswered) the coach jumped ship. Confused after a days of repeated emails and calls, he called the assistant coach and found out the news. My S really liked that coach and was concerned about not knowing who would be there next so he scratched that school off his list. The coach that jumped to another school emailed my S a few weeks later but he was not interested in that new school. This happened over and over again. Our advice is look for a coach that has been at a school for more than five years. Some coaches just love their schools, the area in which they are located and seem to be held in high esteem where they are so they are not looking to jump ship at every interesting option. There are not many of those situations but we did come across a few. S eventually picked an out of state school (9 hour drive away) and lax program that SEEMED to be a great by all our research and more than 5 visits (day visits, overnights, scholarship opportunity visits, etc.) and to make a very long story short…Needless to say it was a huge mistake. Overnight visits with the current team do not in any way dictate how you will get along with freshman coming in or how the upperclassmen will truly treat you once you are signed sealed and delivered. S got there in August and within a week or so we realized that his dislike was not just from homesickness. It was actually a terrible fit. All the claims of academic quality within the lax program was exaggerated! The school had only 3 percent out of state students so my S found out that they did not take well to out of staters. They thought he spoke funny and was weird because he was concerned about his academics. The team mentality told to the incoming freshman was “show up to class, pay attention and you will get a C”. C’s are not something my son has every received or wanted to receive. It was evident that only a very small percentage of the entire student body was interested in their academics. According to my S his high school AP classes were more challenging than the upper level classes at this college. It was also clear that even though it was the off season, there was a lot of time to be spent for your sport and little extra time to join clubs, etc. Since he started the semester and he was receiving a phenomenal academic scholarship he had to finish the semester. He transferred to an excellent University near our home as a commuter. He had found the academic level and challenge he was accustomed to and sought…the only thing missing now was being a part of the campus community (which as a transfer student not living on campus was difficult to get involved in. Therefore, he transferred once again to a highly academic and social southern university where he is now thrilled to be at and is FINALLY living his quintessential college experience (challenging academics, friendly students, interesting clubs, exciting college sports, and yes very pretty girls…lol). Three universities in three semesters is not the optimal way to begin your college experience but my S realized (from speaking to many other transfers at his current university that his sports situation was not unique by any stretch of the imagination and that it was actually more the norm than anyone might have realized) that many of the things he prized and wanted in January of his senior year were so much less important come June, August or even November of that same year. Seniors change a great deal during that year and you need to have more than your sport to leverage when those changes happen. Just one student long and circuitous route to his quintessential college experience that he thought he would never find. Best of luck!
Sooo. Now that all 13 of D16’s apps are in, the acceptances are rolling in. Good for her. I can’t wait for her to hear from her #1 choice (residential) and from at least one of the commutable colleges. Then she’ll have some real choices. And we can relax a bit while waiting for the financial aid award letters. However, I did see something about having to visit one of the schools, now that she’s been accepted, to “compete” for a certain scholarship. What is that all about?!
(I swear, my autocorrect tries to assert its dominance at every move I make…)
@dyiu13, that’s the situation at a couple of D16’s schools too.
Congrats on everyone’s acceptances! D and I have figured out a system: she is sending 4 by Nov. 1 for EA, on by Dec. 1 for THEIR EA, and waiting to see what happens. 1 other is ready to go but for hitting “send” as it’s the super-safety and needs no essays or any extras. She has until Feb. to send her in-state safeties and hopes not to need them.
She’s in the dining room right now filling things out.