@Waiting2exhale I’ve pushed her to apply to schools with very broad range of offerings and options to minor/double major or just change altogether. At her top choice she’ll have tuition covered for 5 years- as they were trying to sell it to her that she could use it for her masters degree- I interjected with “or you could just use that extra year for some fun courses or study abroad options” The admissions guy looked at me a bit surprised- and I just said I would prefer she graduated with a BS and some really cool experiences than to have a MS but not have had opportunities to explore.
In today’s mail: D was accepted to Florida A&M with a $5000 renewable merit scholarship. They’re willing to reconsider her for the next higher scholarship level if she retakes the ACT and scores one point higher. So that’s suddenly moved from a “probably not” school to a “hmm…maybe I should rethink this…”
Catching up…
I think this whole thing is hard on kids. My D just had a big scholarship interview by phone last night. I think it went well, but she is not a phone person and found it quite stressful.
As far as majors, she refuses to decide. She has applied everywhere as undecided, and has gotten into 8/10, all with merit so it doesn’t seem to hurt her much. She wrote an essay on a major that was required at a few schools, but I really doubt she’ll pick that in the end.
Her friends are almost all going to our flagship. It has been hard for her this month as they have been deciding who to room with etc. but she has no desire at all to go there, so not that hard.
@Ballerina016 : Thanks for the link. Again, I call b.s., but no matter.
@MuggleMom: Since my W2exit may not be packing for Princeton, we’ve just turned our active focus to what may still lie ahead.
When one still has so many open doors on the road ahead it is easiest to keep looking forward. We acknowledge anytime the kids are disappointed, talk if they want to talk, and really try not to alter the sound in our voices when, as the days go on, we’re asking about how their day went (not to sound as if we think they are in mourning).
Hopefully the idea of the road opening up ahead will ease your mind.
Congrats @petrichor11 ! And welcome @frenchtoastlover I’m a student as well
I too agree with @Cheeringsection with one addition…I also think that lottery schools tend to have some sort of algorithm of sorts as to who is likely to choose their school over another of the other likely lottery schools the student may have also applied and base their acceptance, deferral, waitlist and merit money on that factor as well.
Super Congrats to you D @petrichor11 that is great news no matter what she decides to do about retaking the test!
When D16 and I talk about her major choice I try very hard to have her look to majors that make her employable in a profession related to her major with her bachelors degree. She definitely wants to go for grad/professional school, with her current thoughts being med school, but just like with her college list that was very practical and focused on schools with good merit possibilities or guarantees and fit her other likes and dislikes, I try to get her to take the same view of her undergraduate major. We all hear the stories of the medieval lit majors who can’t get a job based on their UG education, but I have seen that happen with STEM majors more often than many might think. I ended up taking a few years between UG and grad school and it was nice having a degree that equated to a good paying job immediately after UG, plus in grad school I worked part time in a hospital lab with my degree while a lot of other grad students were waitressing or working in the local supermarket to supplement their stipend, despite having impressive looking degrees in biology or chemistry.
D16 has plenty of AP credits to both take a practical, employment ready major and meet the pre-reqs for whatever grad or professional school she eventually desires to attend. It is a form of planning for those contingencies, changes of mind, life circumstances that do occur, but then she talks to kids and other people who tell her that a more practical degree isn’t as prestigious and the grad or professional schools and she gets leery of my (and DW’s) advice on this issue. Drives me bonkers, but everyone is entitled to their opinion.
She also has a list of schools with some fair amount of geographic and public/private diversity on it and people are constantly giving she or me as her parent their very definitive view on what she should do. Pick school A, it is most prestigious and a private. Pick state school B, lots of smart kids go there from here. Then others follow with don’t pick school B, too many kids from our area go there. Go to school C which is farther away and enjoy the adventure, followed by someone else telling her that all of the kids last year that picked far away schools transferred back closer to home this year. She has a great list and knows what is affordable, so after hearing the million ways she is being pushed and pulled on her school list from outside sources, kids and other parents, we have been staying far more hand’s off on her final school choice, waiting till she asks rather than seeming like we are pushing her one way or another even inadvertently.
Congrats, @petrichor11 ! Will your D retake the ACT? Mine got an email after acceptance that if she could raise her SAT by 10 points she’d qualify for the honors college at one of her schools. Ten points. She will.not.do.it. She’d easily improve if she’d (cough) study (cough). But she’s in a colleges she’d rather attend, so unless SseaDad and I force the issue, it’s not going to happen.
Yesterday I would have said no. Today, she’s thinking about it, but I suspect she’ll probably let it go in the end. Neither of us are entirely convinced she’d do well at a large university at this point. (Score one for the “things can change drastically over the course of senior year” theory, yeah? All but one of her schools was a large state university.)
Ok seriously!?? I took my S to the Ped because his throat had been sore and swollen and he walks in the room and goes ‘where are you going to college?’ S says he’s not sure yet and he literally wouldn’t stop talking about how he cannot drag his feet and he needs to decide and he doesn’t have much time. What??? He had to take a call and he came back in and asked him what his choices where and S starts listing them off and I made a crack like ‘so, it’s kind of hard because he actually has a lot of choices.’ He then says 'well I’m from Chicago so I think you should go to Loyola Chicago.
I just cannot believe that two days after S confesses that this is causing him a lot of anxiety, this guy couldn’t stop buggin him about how he has to decide.
@CAMidwestMom He should’ve told the Dr that he’s going to clown college in Florida. You exercised great restraint not saying something.
I really resent that “where are you going to college” question posed to seniors constantly by otherwise well-meaning adults. I try to remember to phrase any questions (and most teens would prefer none!) as “what are you doing after high school?” I live in a district that has 99% of graduates go on to four or two year colleges, and I still think that is an inappropriate question to pose to the kids.
@GoldenWest It’s so annoying to be constantly asked and I even definitely know. It’s even worse when you don’t feel well and when people don’t close their mouths! @CAMidwestMom I hope your S feels better and his anxiety decreases soon. I’m sure he’ll end up at a wonderful school.
Aaarrgghh! So we have this college visit set up for Friday. DS has been in charge of setting up whatever needs set up to ask his questions. He did call almost 2 weeks ago to get contact info for Study Abroad, etc. Just this evening he shares that the phone number that was given to him does not work so he assumes he wrote it down incorrectly. I suggest an email to his admissions rep asking for assistance. “I hate email” he says. After much prodding I essentially dictated an email asking for help setting up that appointment and getting the other questions answered. Anybody else have a kid that thinks the entire world should communicate by text?
@Cheeringsection -oh, yes! I don’t know how many times I have said, “Just send an email. It doesn’t have to be complex. It will take about 2 minutes to write it out & hit send.” Does he do that? NO. I feel your pain.
@petrichor11 congrats to your D and @GoodGrief16 belated congrats and good wishes to your dd on her interview weekend. @frenchtoastlover welcome.
Dealing with disappointment is a funny thing in my household. The majority of the household assumes everything will go as hoped. I anticipate and make a plan B (C, D, E, F …) to launch at the first inkling of impending disaster. I drive everyone crazy but it is how I deal with the stress. I feel like having other possible outcomes that might provide an equally great though different possibility softens the blow when and if that blow comes. If all turns out happy my plans B-F… can be forced on some other unsuspecting candidate. When my DS was deferred and the rejected from his first choice way back in 2012 it was really hard to take. He was well within the accepted students profile for grades and tests and it seemed pretty arbitrary. But I think in retrospect that school was likely not a good fit and we just didn’t know enough about the “personality” of the school to realize that. It has all turned out, though not without some sadness at the time.
Maybe for the “what’s your major” those so inclined could adopt the SAT Essay template writing strategy and make something truly ludicrous up.
In news, DD just got invited to the scholarship weekend at UGA. Those of you who have been through these sorts of interview weekends, any advice would be cheerfully received!
@Themommymommy DS16 recently went for group interviews at Wofford and will be attending group and individual interviews at CofC Honors in Feb. He’s going to be doing some mock interviews next Tues so I will have some more suggestions then, but a couple of weeks ago I started a thread on how to shine during group interviews. There was one poster , N’s mom who had some great suggestions. You many want to search that thread. Congrats and good luck to your daughter.
Yay @Themommymommy !!! @Cheeringsection I have no problems sending and returning emails but getting people in NHS and Student Council (especially guys) to do it is like pulling teeth. So annoying. It’s not that hard.
@readingclaygirl That’s a very good skill! My D09 is now in the workplace and people will ask her to write simple emails and she’s kind of baffled by that and figured it’s time they learned to write their own emails.
My son will not text or email! He also refuses to get a smartphone. I told him that he needs to have one before he leaves for college, but all I get is a lot of grumbling under the breath.