We feel pressure for the right fit , as its a hugh financial commitment. DD doesnt want to do admitted student days and I am very frustrated by that. there are days I want to throw in in towel, tell her that she will spend the next year or two in state or CC , and then transfer. But then I remember having the 4 year college experience at my dream school and want to give her the same. Difference is that my parents knew once I made up my mind I ever changed it. D changes her mind all the time!.
I wish we knew where we were visiting in April! :-w Feeling antsy… all of these March 15th to April 1st schools are killing me.
@cleoforshort I don’t know, I chose my college(s) because of fit. I am positive I would not have been happy in a small college in the middle of nowhere, so I chose a larger one in the middle of a big city that had great programs for my major. As for my D17, I can really see the difference in the schools we visited and how her top two choices would clearly make better matches for her. In the end, she wanted big city life and the particular program she chose has required classes that are small in size and in topics that interest her in an environment that suits her. I think it matters.
@Mom2aphysicsgeek Yuk on the drive and I’m glad you made it without incident! I felt the same way when we drove from Philly to Boston, I would just fly next time.
FYI some of my children’s friends are reporting that Va. Tech first wave of RD are up. I think some of you ate waiting. Good luck!
@socalmom007 Ithaca’s tunnels are the best! The waiting is brutal. I think you mentioned this already, but remind me as to which schools your daughter is leaning toward at this point?
@NerdMom88 It’s so nice to hear you had an uplifting chat with your daughter! I know it’s been rough… If I recall, your good friend lives nearby? Do they get together much?
@sdl0625 And that’s a good point, it does make it easier to dole out the payments when you feel they are thriving! if they hate it, not so much.
@sdl0625 – you may have said before, but why doesn’t she want to do admitted student days? Has she already visited campus?
@Fishnlines29 Yes, my best friend (and D’s godmother) lives nearby. They typically get together a couple of times in a semester, but my friend plans to try for once a month or so, to help support her. I know she’s applied for Stafford loans to cover the loss of her scholarship for this semester, but she’s got another tough hurdle coming. She has to talk to her grandmother, explain the loss of the scholarship, and get access to the funds in her college account established by her. Crossing my fingers and saying prayers!
Hugs to everyone ready to be done with the process. DS was the 1st and only. I love the whole process, so ED has been anti-climatic for me. This group made it fun. Very happy with the outcome, but would have enjoyed being in the process longer. Weird, huh? @-)
@Fishnlines29 I literally have no idea. She’s been accepted to Cal Poly SLO, UT Austin, Ithaca College, Duquesne, Manhattan College… and a few other small privates. Purdue offered her acceptance but under a different major, so I think it’s off the table. Still waiting on UC’s, NYU, Fordham, Drexel, etc… If she were choosing just for herself she loved Fordham and NYU and has always wanted to go to college in New York. She also loved Ithaca college. She and her boyfriend are very invested in wanting to be together. We have to wait and see where he gets in and if it will work. I think his parents will be averse to East Coast unless he gets into a reach Ivy. I think UC’s are very likely as his parent picks. As far as mom and dad are concerned Cal Poly SLO is a done deal, let’s pay the deposit! If boyfriend also gets into SLO or an adjacent UC I think it could easily be the choice, which would make us very happy. I’ve been praying for BF to just get into SLO nonstop!
I just wanted to add my thoughts about campus visits. My older D was accepted to several good schools but narrowed her choice down to BU with a full tuition scholarship, UPenn and Brown. We visited BU first on what was to be back to back campus visits. After attending the events at BU she turned to me and said “this is where I belong” and we cancelled the remainder of our trip. People at her school were appalled that she turned down 2 Ivies. It was the best decision we ever made! She is thriving and amazingly successful at BU. We would have never known without visiting the school. I wish this peace of mind for all the mothers on CC 
I wasn’t saying that other other kids aren’t intellectual or hadn’t overcome adversities; I was talking about the criteria my daughter is using and how we as a family determine fit (as do you, when you say that one criterion for your daughter is that a coach wants her or that they have the sport she wants).
By the same token, one could well read your post as implying that other kids are neither resilient nor will they “bloom where planted” and that we are all obsessed with fit.
I prefaced everything my remarks by saying YMMV and merely said why fit was important to us. Again, YMMV.
@socalmom007 - I’m feeling your pain about not being able to plan for April visits (I say as I try to juggle March accepted students days and scholarship competitions – a good problem to have, but still anxiety provoking).
@Cubanmom3 - here’s hoping that all our kids find “the one!”
Our tour of RPI wasn’t uppity, it was kknd of the opposite of that. The kid was studying to be a nuclear physicist or something like that. He was pretty nice, but maybe not the best tour giver. We rushed thru and the other people in our group were kind of duds so it wasn’t very engaging. The guide liked the school and said he was pretty involved with stuff on campus.
When we finished my son and I went and got some lunch, walked around, stopped to say hi to a coach real quickly, and then drove around to check stuff out. It was good going at our own pace and nobody hassled us.
So I’ve visited RPI,wpi, clarkson in terms of stem schools. They seemed pretty similar in what they are trying to accomplish.
RPI had more offerings, seemed more intense, bigger campus, more jocks,frats etc. RPI seems more " big time" than the other two, for better or worse. Big buildings, stadiums, theatres etc 2 hours 15 easy drive for us.
Wpi seems like a nice spot if you don’t want to live in a big city, but not in the sticks. We live too close so son17 not into it, and for some reason didn’t love it. He has friends going next year though, and I think it’s s good school.
Clarkson was the most friendly and safest feeling. The kids were nice and I personally liked it. I ccan see it might get boring if you weren’t actively involved in clubs:sports etc. I also like cold weather and the woods, but not everybody does,
I got a good feeling there, Son likes it, but it’s a far drive for us, maybe too far- 5 1/2 hours, no easy driving either.
I don’t know what I would pick as a favorite, they all had their pros and cons.
Very much so @LoveTheBard ! NYU says April 1st, my D17 may have a heart attack by then. I keep reminding her NYU finances are unlikely to work out for she and BF, just to mitigate expectations. I’ll feel a lot better when I know what our UC picture looks like.
Really, really interesting moment in the car this morning, and topical for recent discussions on this thread:
[quote]
D25: [D17’s name], have you decided where you’re going to college yet?
D17: Nope, not yet.
D25: Why not?
D17: Because I haven’t heard what the scholarships are that I’ll get from all of my schools.
D25: What happens if you get a half-tuition scholarship to the school you really want to go to, but a full-tuition scholarship to a school you want to go to, but not as much?
insert a solid couple seconds of silence here
D17 [slowly]: What you said is probably what’s going to happen.
D25: Really?
D17: Yes, really.
D25: So where would you go?
D17: I’ll go to the one with the full-tuition scholarship, and be happy I’m saving money./quote
ETA: For completeness, particularly for those who are new to the thread, D17’s response about that being what’s likely to happen is because she already has a full-tuition award from Alabama, and is very likely to get Muhlenberg’s award that’s close to half tuition, and those are currently her leading contenders.
@dfbdfb roll tide!!!
Did I make it clear we really want D17 to go to CP SLO? Trying to keep our mouths shut is killing us! UC Davis or UCSB could be really good too, but we don’t know that she’ll get in.
@RightCoaster D14 went up to see RPI twice and loved it, we laughed that the landscaping looked like it was done by engineers! She ultimately did not apply although I wish she had, I think that school has a lot to offer, and their job placement was phenomenal.
What the freak is “YMMV”???
@vandyeyes Your Mileage May Vary
Thanks… I feel way better now @Ynotgo