@WhereIsMyKindle I hope the interview went well. It’s nerve wracking but now your D has an idea of what to expect in the future and hopefully gain more confidence.
@MichiganGeorgia yay for another driver in the house and freedom for you!
@whataboutcollege congrats on your D’s job. A first paycheck is very exciting!
@MichiganGeorgia…having just raced against the clock to schedule the driving test, get the actual license and then the insurance card that are all needed to get a parking spot before the first day—:::::BIG APPLAUSE::!! That is a huge ordeal…proud of both of you.
It is surreal when they drive away. Honestly, I’m glad D was kind of a late driver. We had an amazing three years in the car together and I wouldn’t change it any of it. Well…except the last month of school. She ran me around like an Uber driver and also extended my Uber car free services to her friends lol. I was ready to be done with that part!
@whataboutcollege …congrats on the job! Did she listen to your wisdom or no?
Making the list: It’s been a long, complicated process.
Back freshman year, D17 told me what majors she was most interested in. (She gave me two majors, plus one that she wanted the possibility of at least minoring in.) Using mainly the College Board’s majors book, I built a list of all colleges that had either of the majors (171). D17 cut a handful of schools that she didn’t want to go to for very specific reasons (163), and then decided she wanted only colleges on the list that had both major fields (47); she requested information from these. At this point, I started gathering detailed information for the spreadsheet on a lot (a lot) of different variables of important to her and her mother me (and sometimes even all of us), and then she dropped a few schools based on red flags in the data, including affordability issues (24). She then looked at the curricula of these schools, and we went on our big lower-48 college tour summer before her junior year; I don’t have the effects of each, but both of them together cut the list further (19). At this point there were 4 additional schools we learned about with that had had programs in one of her fields of interest but had just added a program in the other; 2 of these stuck (so we were now at 21). She then took a seriously intense look at curriculum, including whether it would be possible for her to double-major and still finish in four years, which cut the list to its current length (11).
With D19, it’s been slightly different so far. We also started freshman year with a list of colleges that offered any of the three related but somewhat unusual fields she was interested in (157). She’d been on college tours and knew something of what sort of school she’s interested in, as well as some stuff she’d gleaned from her older sister, and did an initial cut of the list based more on qualitative factors (65). That’s where we are now, and probably won’t move further on that until after her sister is done with applications.
(Yes, I’ve kept separate versions of all of these spreadsheets. It’s just what I do. Why are you all looking funny at me like that?)
@dfbdfb The spreadsheet…I totally get that. It’s the kids who know what they want to major in at 15 that has me scratching my head 
@whataboutcollege same thing is going on at my house! DD got her first job,hostess at a restaurant and I just HAD to share my college waitress knowledge! Since she has a drivers license and a handmedown car, she is so independent! @dfbdfb I live for college spreadsheets, they are a life saver, even if like my DD there are only about 6 schools currently being seriously considered. My older DD has just finished her first week of college sophomore classes, SO MUCH easier to move in and say goodbye the second year! I kept flashing back to freshman year and all of my worries, none of which became big issues. She is loving college! So my hope is all these 2017ers find the right fit for them.
Congrats to all the kids with new jobs and licenses! Very exciting!
@greeny8 …glad to see you are back. How was move in day? You doing okay?
@WhereIsMyKindle Remember that if an interview goes long, that is usually a good sign!
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i cant agree enough with this. it was the best thing we ever did. Mine used to say “I dont care where I go to college as long as I GO”…
suddenly the kid who didnt care had a gazillion and one criteria as to what she will and will not deal with–so much for that it doesnt matter attitude.
so yeah. i’m mostly driving the list o’ one school at the moment and desperately trying to fill in with others that fall within her criteria. since i’m having a rough time doing it, i’ll go with she wouldnt really even know where to begin on her own.
i stumbled here the beginning of freshman year and was terrified at what i did and didnt know (i honestly thought EVERYONE scored 33+ on the ACT and got full rides to 'Bama)
frankly, i’m still terrified. i’ve learned a lot, read a boatload of humblebrags and read some delusional interesting posts–this place keeps me on my toes and highly entertained most days.
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D just got confirmation that her second LOR is in the works. That’s 1 done, 1 in progress. So both will be ready after NMSF results are announced and she’ll be able to hit the submit buttons on her apps (assuming she finishes all her essays, which I’m counting on given how focused she gets once schools starts…she becomes like a totally different kid. lol).
^^ I couldn’t agree more about touring schools as well as keeping things in perspective when reading posts on cc.
Over the past two years we’ve toured almost 20 schools – big schools, small schools, private schools, public schools, religious schools, schools that were strong safeties and schools that were never going to be an option (ie. Stanford). We toured dorms, dining halls, departments, spoke to advisors, drove around on weekend nights,etc to try to get the vibe and lifestyle of different college communities. In the end, it helped both kids (as well as both parents) realize what every school had (ex. campus safety and blue lights) and what was different or unique in certain schools. It helped '17 realize that college isn’t as scary as initially thought.
I think the most interesting part of CC for me is to look at the college acceptance lists from last year. There will be posts where kids are beyond thrilled to get accepted into a particular school. If I click on that member and read where they eventually end up attending, it is usually somewhere else. It takes a lot of time to go back and read someone’s older posts but it helps put things in perspective and lets me see what type of kids (stats wise) are actually attending a school. What I have found is that the vast majority of posts on the acceptance threads don’t actually end up going to that school.
It’s been interesting watching my Daughter evolve on what she is looking for in a school. Other than of course the Program she wants, each visit helps clarify. Some things that are important to her I never would have thought of. For example, architecture of the buildings, doesn’t like the plain brick likes ones with more character to them. Green space, as we toured I could see she was scouting for places to hang an ENO to read and relax. Dorms, really didn’t seem to care as much about fancy rooms, just needs a bed as she said she doesn’t plan to be in her room that much.
Rec Centers, while the climbing wall’s are fun, not a big deal to her if they don’t have one. Sports, she wants a school with big time athletics as she enjoy’s watching the games and how well are they attended. This actually turned her off to one school. Went to a football game when visiting and she noticed how little student body was there. Student Unions, hasn’t really said much about those, I think she is just wanting to make sure the basics are there.
Surrounding area, this has been a bigger deal then I would have thought. Having shops, restaurants, etc. right next to campus more important to her. Like right across the street rather than a mile or two down the road. Walkability of the campus and surrounding area and not having to rely on a car or bus.
Greek System, she wants to be in a sorority so looking at Greek Life and housing has been important to her.
I’m pretty certain she has her mind made up on her top choice and her 2nd. Not so sure she knows if those two don’t come through but I feel she will get into both. When it comes down to it will run through the pros and cons of all schools she gets accepted at and then figure out what’s best overall.
This…
I did this exact thing with my older D12 for spring break of her junior year. And I’ve made this advice to a number of parents who are just starting out. We just did a local trip, went to a bunch of different types of schools of a variety of different sizes. Many did not end up on her list for a variety of reasons, but it really helped figure out what she wanted.
I completely agree on visits! Even if none of what you visit ends up staying on the list it’s incredibly helpful. S has visited 5 schools of varying size and type and it really really helped him understand what he wants and doesn’t want and his list has morphed quite a bit as a result. It is interesting as we find ourselves now in a situation of a list of 13, only 2 of which he has seen and will not be able to see the rest unless he applies and is accepted.
Even with that, thanks to the visits he has done we feel very good about the potential fit at all. It does make it hard to narrow that list down though!
School started yesterday and the fact that things are going so well now practically has me nervous! There were some big scheduling issues, but the people in charge of such things at both the HS and college (where she is doing concurrent enrollment) were very helpful and quick to respond. She’s taking AP Calc BC and AP Physics at her HS. She’ll also be a teacher’s aide for Intro to Engineering, which counts as a class. She’s taking a EE class at college called “sustainable energy” which couldn’t be more perfect as that is the field she wants to go into. Her other class is Intro to LGBT Studies and from what we saw on ratemyprof, the professor should be really amazing. Both classes are about 40 students which is also a big plus. I’m so excited to see how these go!
Next up is LoR’s. She is going to spend this weekend filling out the Naviance sections that her LoR teachers will be looking at. I’ve already got a list going of what I think needs to be included. Once she gets that done I don’t have any worries about the LoR’s – partly because I expect them to be really strong, but mostly because it will be out of our hands.
Essays
Her CA essay has a strong start, but it definitely will need more and I’m expecting multiple revisions. Her topic has led to some worry about feeling exposed and vulnerable to strangers. I’ve set up an essay table like the one from [url = http://blog.prepscholar.com/how-to-write-a-college-essay]this article. Seven of her colleges require supplementals, but nothing too over-the-top. I think Oregon State U might fall of the list due to the essays. It’s not a high-interest school and there are six essays required, only 100 words each, but very cliche/blah (talk about leadership, talk about community service, talk about diversity, etc.)
Making of (and current state of) the list
This was done 100% by me. I did tons of research to find schools that looked very strong in her specialized area of interest. Then we went through various websites and reviews together and eliminated the no-go’s. The list stands at 16, but as I mentioned, OR State is in a precarious position. I expect at least a couple more will come off before she applies anywhere. Depending on EA results, quite a few more could drop.
Mythical merit
Nice term! Smith, WPI, URochester, CWRU, and VA Tech are all mythical or close enough to mythical that I don’t spend much time thinking about them.
Responses to college search
We’re probably in a bit of a different position than most. For the most part I’ve only discussed the list with family and friends who are close enough that they are familiar with D’s early struggles. They are just thrilled she’s going to college. My family in Virginia think VA Tech is an especially great choice, while BIL in NY thinks her three NY schools should be strong contenders. FIL and his sister love the idea of Smith because they think it would a great fit (which it would be).
Difference from my experience
Really different. My parents weren’t very involved. I remember going through the Fiske book, but honestly I just wanted to go the “best” (i.e. best reputation, not best fit) engineering school I could get into. I applied early to GA Tech (one page application and no essay), got in and that was it.
Kids at same school
D is doing her concurrent enrollment at older D’s university and they are both positively thrilled. They already plan on having lunch together regularly. D and S18 could conceivably end up at the same school as they both like RIT quite a bit. That would certainly be convenient for H and I. Seems statistically unlikely though!
My D would be a head-scratcher for you – she decided as a freshman in Intro to Engineering that she wanted to be an electrical engineer working in the field of renewable energy. Has not changed! I would have no idea how to proceed with a kid who didn’t have specific interests because narrowing the field would be such a challenge. Oldest D also wanted a very specific program as does S18. Even though their areas of interest are all different, the actual list-making process is pretty similar.
3 of my 5 oldest knew by 8th or 9th grade what they wanted to pursue. One decided in 12th. My Aspie, who is 24, still lacks direction for all adult issues, career included. (My 9th grader has said she wants to be a meteorologist since she was 5. We’ll see if that remains true once she starts heavy duty physics courses.)
One of the security questions on the airline frequent flyer account website for S19 was
What did you want to be when you grow up?
Miner was not an option in the scroll-down choices. =))
Nor was Lego designer.
I chose a different security question for him. :))
Was lead singer for Bay City Rollers a choice?
@STEM2017 Nope, but there may have been artist and singer. ;)) Doctor and teacher were definitely choices.
@stlarenas #14007, I agree it’s kind of crazy—but my D17 has been focused on her preferred fields for a solid 6 years, D19 has had a little more wiggle but only within a very narrow band of interests for even a bit longer (and thus since she was a good bit younger than when D17 discovered what she loves), and D23(!) has had a laser-like focus on what she wants to do since, very seriously, before she started kindergarten (and even though she’s only in 6th grade, has surprised us with independently made academic choices that she’s clearly made with that end goal in mind—she frightens me a little bit).
At least D25 has no idea what she wants to do with her life and, given her personality, is unlikely to until maybe junior year of college, so at least I’ve got one normal one! 