D takes the SAT on Saturday. Fingers crossed for a decent score. I have zero bandwidth to go through this kind of prep ever again.
@gatormama Right there with you. Trying to walk the line between āletās just get it done with one testā and āitās ok, honey, just do your best and there are plenty of other test datesā.
Bottom line is that he will never have as much time as he had this last summer to study. He probably spent 10-12 hours a week for the last eight weeks. Heās pretty self motivated. Iām afraid that intensity is going to work against him on Saturday and heāll put a ton of pressure on himself to do well. He has a score in mind and already asked if we can get him a tutor to teach him strategy if heās not happy with his score. Heās pretty good on content, just sometimes psyches himself out when he gets frustrated with a reading passage or a math question where heās having a brain cramp.
He wants to do more prep tonight. I just want him to do his school homework and get to bed.
She did a practice test and we went over the ones she got wrong a couple days ago. I couldnāt help her with math, her weak subject, but I could sure help her with the verbal sections. She got something like a 650, which is much better, but still not at her capabilities. And there was no reason for her to get anything wrong - with the exception of one question, which was vague enough to argue for two answers as correct. She was sloppy in every incorrect answer. Read too fast, didnāt read the right section, etc etc. She knows this stuff but she is overconfident in verbal and not confident enough in math. Sigh.
On my sonās most recent SAT practice test, he missed two āits/itāsā questions and had the correct answer for two math grid-in questions on his paper, but copied them incorrectly when entering the answer. He just shrugged it off and laughed. I have no idea what will actually happen on test day. Good luck to all the '19s taking it tomorrow.
@dfbdfb I wasnāt meaning to dismiss regional schools. I just canāt fathom that a kid who takes mostly honors classes, will take 5 or 6 APs, gets mostly A/A- grades and will have around a 1400-1450 on the SAT may be shut out of a school like VA Tech because he didnāt have 10+APs. It shouldnāt be that difficult to get into a school with a 65+% acceptance rate!
A question for the parenting-an-ADHD-student folks here: would you please share how you straddle the line between letting your student (now a junior in high school) manage schoolwork and turning things in on time, and you checking online gradebooks (etc.) regularly to make sure there are no missing assignments and things are getting turned in on time?
Weāre having a start-of-school family meeting this weekend and Iād like to improve upon what didnāt work well last school year.
@OrangeFish, my kids donāt have ADHD issues but I can tell you what we do in case it helps. First, when I pick them up we briefly discuss the highs and lows of their days and then they list off whatever homework they have. If they are especially chatty that day, we go class by class and try tell me how it went and what homework they have. This feels normal to them because itās pretty much what weāve always done and they hear my husband and I discuss our days similarly.
I check the portal frequently each day. Not because I feel it is helicoptering but because my internet connection is best and if there is a problem then the girls can connect with a teacher before they leave school that day to clear it up. Weāve had a handful of times over the years when something had been entered in wrong. My kids hate that and want it cleared up ASAP. If itās there even overnight, it bothers them. So I check frequently and if something unexpected pops up, I will text them before school gets out so they can check in with a teacher. Itās also beneficial because they randomly text me to tell me something about a grade they got, and itās harder to understand what they are saying without context.
This is a very good question that I worry about a lot. My D19 suffers from anxiety in addition to ADHD, and last year she pretty much refused to look at the online gradebook or classroom website because it āmade her anxious.ā She would miss a day of class and act as if that day just didnāt exist, and wouldnāt ask the teacher what she missed or look online or ask another student, all because of anxiety. She has accumulated a lot of Bās in her first 2 years purely as a result of missing assignments. When she turns something in, she usually gets a good grade on it but itās impossible to get an A in a class with a bunch of zeroes in the gradebook. Iām hoping she transitions this year to taking responsibility for this, but I still find myself looking at the online gradebook and reminding/nagging her about missing assignments. Weāre finishing the 3rd week of classes this week and itās already an issue.
You have described my D, @Corinthian , who has ADHD and anxiety, and describes the experience as āspiralingā when she is overwhelmed. She does not seem to get started right away, and combined with perfectionism, she simply shuts down. I try to use logic (āa grade of 90 on the first day an assignment is due is equal to a 100 less 10% for being late on the second day an assignment is dueā) but that doesnāt seem to click. By the time I am seeing missing assignments in the online gradebook, it can be a week to two weeks after the assignment due date. (Teachers do not post assignments and/or due dates on the gradebook quickly or consistently.)
Wow @OrangeFish sounds like we have very similar Dās. Mine has perfectionism issues too (related to anxiety Iām sure) and this is a huge problem especially with her art classes. Last year there was one painting in particular where she literally left a white space about the size of a nickel on the painting and refused to paint that and declare herself done until the last day of school, by which time she was about 6 weeks late turning it in. I donāt know how sheās going to get the work done for her portfolio in AP Studio Art. I canāt tell you how many times Iāve had the exact conversation youāve described, where I say: just turn it in because X% is a lot better than ZERO."
Iām still researching best options for my ADHD/anxiety D who also has some dyslexia. Last spring we visited the SALT center at the University of Arizona which is in state for us and seems like a good option. When we went to the CTCL event we stopped by the table for Cornell College in Iowa, which is on a block schedule. That got me wondering if a block schedule would be a good choice for an ADHD kid. Colorado College is another school with a block schedule.
My D is also taking AP Studio Art, @Corinthian, and I am concerned about her getting her work done on time for that as well.
We just bought a dry-erase wall calendar and Iām hoping visually seeing āthe yearā will help us all keep on track. D does not want to use a coach, even though I have offered several times.
I hope you and your D get things turned around soon! School starts here on Monday and thereās a tiny bit of me dreading it.
My S19 has ADHD, but no anxiety or perfectionism. He is Mr. A minus. He is willing to check SIS (online gradebook) daily to make sure anything missing is turned in promptly and I remind him to check Blackboard/Google classroom even when he thinks he doesnāt have HW. Iāve given up on getting him to use a planner, but he only missed a couple of HW assignments last year. Paying him for As on his report card helped. I never look at his grades.
I started putting it in his hands in middle school. He got a lot more Bs back then, but he gradually figured things out. He still procrastinates and does stuff at odd hours, but it gets completed. He gets stressed if I try to tell him when, where or how I think he should do his HW, so I just back off. He doesnāt get that stressed if he realizes at 11 pm that he has a long assignment that is due the next day. He just asks for a cup of coffee. Itās actually easier for him to focus when he knows heās out of time. I think heās probably an odd one, though.
My older kid has anxiety and it was much more of a struggle.
S19ās SAT test at Austin High School, Austin, Texas is cancelled.
Oh, well.
@payn4ward ugh. I guess the most important thing is to stay safe. Can you change the date without a fee? Letās hope so!
Iām hoping they will do that. It is being rescheduled to September but that date does not work for us. 
@payn4ward oh no! Silver lining- more time to study?
S19 also has issues with turning in work. "UGH. hoping this year will be better. He also thinks when he gets a bad grade āhe can fix itā. He has ended up with some Bās. His first APUSH quiz he got a 75. i am sure that was because he did not study.
Older D17 has anxiety and ADHD and an LD. She is starting her classes at GW this monday. Keeping fingers crossed. I watched many a meltdown over assignments. will see how being on her own is.
Hopefully as they all mature, they will get the hang of things, and learn how to cope . At least that is my hope.
@payn4ward, if nothing else you should be able to get a full refund and apply it to a different sitting.
Dropped S19 at rival high school to take SAT. He went to bed last night at 9:30 and actually fell right asleep so managed to get a full nine hours. (This makes me wonder if he could fall asleep every night at 9:30 but cannot get to bed that early with all of the homework!). He was in a good mood. Had a good breakfast. I thought Iād have some words of wisdom for him but he was just all chatty about school and friends on the trip to the test so I didnāt end up giving him any particular advice.
He didnāt want to bring his phone, so Iāll just plan on being back at school at noon. Curious to see what he thought. Not sure if his impression of this test will match his score. Heās had practice tests that he thought went poorly and went well and vice versa.
Good luck to all taking the test today!
@homerdog, pulling for your S. He worked hard on his prep, I bet his score will reflect this!
Dropped D21 off for the SAT also. Boy the line was all the way out into the parking lot.
She tossed and turned last night. Not because of the SAT, she has some problems with insomnia.
Made her eggs, sausage and toast for breakfast (feels good to make her breakfast).
She is taking the SAT for no other reason that she wants to compare her score with last yearās score.
No essay. No prep.
We donāt worry about multiple SAT sittings, as we are shooting for NMF and schools that provide NMF auto merit.
Fingers crossed for all the kiddos taking the SAT today.