@MWolf that is such a tragedy.
We will give checks for $20.19 to S19’s closest buddies and small gift cards to a few others. The first party was today with more coming up the next few weekends.
@MWolf That’s so sad. I echo the comment about wanting to bubblewrap kids.
More ‘lasts’ here. S19’s soccer team got knocked out of post-season so we watched his last HS soccer game yesterday. Good game and great 4 years of soccer with the school. Prom was last night. I have had no reports. S not home yet after sleepover with friends. Classes done on Thursday, just AP test on Tuesday left. Then he has a 2 week internship (senior thing), presentation on that, and then graduation!
My husband ended up taking a group of 7 kids from the prom to an afterparty at a bar with video games last night. The kids all had fun, ordered sodas and felt like grownups. The party broke up about 1 AM and I don’t expect to hear a peep from kiddo until after noon. So, successful prom all around.
@MWolf very, very sad. I always try to remember, really remember, to appreciate every single day with my kids. This is a good reminder to do so.
Happy Mother’s Day to all the mom’s out there 
I hope all of your days are just want you want them to be!
Hope all of you Mkms have a nice day with your kids !
Thanks @RightCoaster
Update on D19’s class graduation celebration. Turns out the fundraising throughout the school year enabled the committee to lower the ticket price to $110 from $160. The schedule:
7:30 p.m.: Cocktail party (drinking age is 16 for beer and wine in Switzerland, 18 for all else, so high-school parties generally feature alcohol)
9 p.m.: Dinner
11 p.m.: Party with DJ, “surprise acts,” drinks and photo booths
1:30 a.m.: Midnight snack
2 a.m.: Night lounge
4 a.m.: Breakfast at a club behind the hotel
Parents are technically invited to the early cocktail party (for $25 each), but I doubt many go. We certainly won’t – leaving the night fully to D19 and her friends. I’m sure she’ll have a great time.
Her IB exams start today, the culmination of two years of work. Exciting to be winding down toward graduation and our return to the States.
@Vineyarder that sounds like a great party for the kids!
So, just as expected, son19 has become ill again right at the end of the semester, and is on antibiotics. It’s like clockwork, every time, when all of the big tests, and big sports events starts he gets sick and/or hurt. He’s pretty frustrated. He has AP tests all week, and he’s just not feeling well, so not sleeping well, which will not help him in the classroom or in sports. Fortunately he’s not too stressed about the tests, at least I don’t think he is. He’s not planning on using any AP cradits to place out of any classes, so really they are kind of a waste of time and money. They count as his Final exam though, so essentially we are paying College Board for his public school final exam, total waste!!
He’s hoping to rally back fast so that he can perform at a top level this weekend in a big sporting event. We’ll see. At least the weather looks OK for this weekend.
@liska21 bummer on soccer loss! Those are hard to swallow.
@MWolf sorry hear to the news of the student’s death, that is very sad.
@RightCoaster ugh! Sharing your misery here as my D just started her 2nd course of antibiotics today (after not having had any for 3 years!). It’s the weather here in MA–April was truly ugly and May is shaping up to be similar. Hope your DS recovers for the weekend!
We managed our marathon trip to Florida this weekend without anyone killing anyone else, so I’m calling it a success! My D19, who has never been confident in her photography skills, managed to get some pointe photos of D20 for me in the Wizarding World that I’ll cherish forever. And I had a full day on Saturday- 9am to 10pm- of complete freedom and relaxation. It’s been YEARS and I desperately needed it. I can’t believe graduation is only a few days away. I still have so much to get done before we leave that it hasn’t fully sunk in yet.
Maybe this is somewhat off topic to the current discussion- but, I found this article that showed up in one of my college google alerts pretty interesting for anyone who has younger kids heading to college in the next year or two…
The Shrinking World of Need-Blind Admissions
College of the Holy Cross says it can no longer afford to admit students without regard to financial need. Meanwhile, discount rates nationally hit record highs.
@EganAg I really don’t like any article that talks about a “discount rate”. Not all families get a discount rate and so many articles make it sound like all families get a break when it comes to price. It took me months to convince my husband that we would be full price everywhere they did not offer merit. He kept seeing articles about discount rates!
Survived the weekend. Soccer/family dinner/other grad party/church/our grad party/choir concert. Also had DD’17’s boyfriend here the whole weekend so had to make sure the house was clean 
DD’s party was a success. Lots of guests (100-200? idk) and the mac & cheese bar went well. At 5:00 sharp we started picking up around the people still visiting and whipped the church back in shape quick because the concert was at 6:00. Concert was great and DD didn’t cry, even though it was her last HS concert.
This morning as she got out of the car she said “This is your last drop off ever, bye!” She has one more day but will need to drive tomorrow.
She’s been posting Senior Sunday pics on Instagram and I loved yesterday’s caption: “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” (Winnie the Pooh).
Yeah," discount rate" seems to always be code name for schools my kids aren’t interested in, ha.
That’s not entirely true, they were both offered some merit aid at a handful of schools. But the reality came down to saving 10-18 K per year off of 70K, paying full Private sticker price, or look at State school at around 30k all in.
So, 30k vs 70k is a big deal, I agree. But the difference between 58k and 70K, not as much. Might as well blow the cash now on something I can see vs handing it over to the kids when I’m dead LOL.
@homerdog agree. It is not a universal discount rate.
That’s funny @RightCoaster. My D19 applied mostly to NESCACs, so, there were no discounts or merit. My S19 on the other hand got discounts from most places, except where he wanted to go and ended up accepting.
@homerdog As I read that article and the one linked within it, “Discount Rate” is “defined as institutional grant dollars as a percentage of gross tuition and fee revenue”. https://www.insidehighered.com/news/2019/05/10/nacubo-report-shows-tuition-discounting-trend-continuing-unabated. So I would assume it includes both merit aid and need based grant aid that comes from the college. So do Pell Grants count as institutional grant dollars? I would think not. From the parent perspective, calling it a “discount” feels a bit unsettling because it makes you feel like you’re missing out on something others are getting just because they’re better informed and in the know, which of course is not the case.
I do wonder about schools that basically give everyone grant aid, like Ursinus? Why not just lower the stated COA? https://www.ursinus.edu/offices/student-financial-services/grants-scholarships-loans/ursinus-gateway-scholarship/.
@Corinthian Because the more you charge, the more you look elite. If you lowered COA, people might think you aren’t worth the same as another school which charges more. Plus. The grant aid makes some parents happy to get that discount (even if most/many get the same or more).
Note: that isn’t how I feel or what I believe but it is the perception.
^^. I agree, they artificially charge more and discount so people feel like they are getting a premium product at a discount. But I think this strategy just causes the “ elite” schools to outprice them so they look more prestigious. Totally stupid.
I don’t think any of this pricing nonsense is going to go away during the next 4 years, so I am resigned to just dealing with it. Hopefully for future generations of students they will find a way to make state schools more truly affordable to everyone, and the trickle down might be the elite privates don’t feel like they have to demand such a premium with huge increases year after year. I am quite skeptical this will happen any time soon.
In addition, offering scholarships off a high price tag allows the scholarships to be revoked if grades slip.
It’s kind of like a credit card going to the “default” interest rate if someone makes a late payment, really.
That was an interesting article about more colleges becoming ‘need aware’. For Holy Names, the article says that they were only need-aware at the end of the RD round and not the ED round. “First the admissions team evaluated the entire applicant pool, admitting those who applied early decision on a need-blind basis. Then the college admitted 1,900 applicants through regular admission. At that point [after the 1,900], the funds for the financial aid budget were largely depleted.” At that point they had another 90 or so spots left and those spots were ‘need-aware’ spots.
The student newspaper at S19’s school (private) did a survey asking students where they committed and whether they submitted the FAFSA or CSS Profile. They asked other things too (legacy, whether parents donated to any of the schools they applied to, did they pay for test prep tutoring, that kind of thing). It was an article about the role of socio-economic status in college admissions and how that played out in S19’s school. I was surprised to read that only 16% of the seniors at his school submitted the FAFSA or CSS. Even if families didn’t qualify for finaid, I would have expected more would submit FAFSA for the federal loans.