My S22 continues the job hunt for a post graduation job. Earlier this week he had an initial screening interview for a job that I think would be interesting work and yesterday they reached out to ask to schedule a follow up interview. Selfishly, i’m hoping that this job is it for him because of everything he’s looked at, it’s the closest to us (maybe 2.5 hour drive?). It’s not the perfect unicorn job, but that doesn’t exist, and I think he’s gotten ok with the idea of letting go a lot of the things he’d really like in terms of location, ideal job type etc. If he got this (and yes, I know, way to early to think that) it would be a location that could be wonderful - if he had friends - and could totally suck without. It’s a small town, near mountains, all the outdoorsy stuff he likes. The town has two colleges in it, so it’s vibrant enough with enough young people. But it’s far from all his friends, not easy to access a good size airport to get to people, and not really a big enough city to have concerts or things like that. The last two summers he was working in distant locations for his internships and I think he was really lonely, so I think he’s worried about that. But if he gets the job he only needs to do it for a couple of years to get some experience and make himself more marketable to better located employers. So lets just all cross our fingers that this works out for him.
Fingers and toes crossed!!
My D has had good luck meeting new friends on some of the friend apps, joining walking groups, and volunteering in her new community. It’s hard to start over but she has standing virtual game nights with old friends and FTs regularly with them. They travel to see each other a couple of times a year too.
It’s unlikely that everyone will all land in the same place and tech makes it easy to stay in touch and also meet new folks.
Best of luck to your son!!!
All good and positive thoughts for your son!
The friend thing is, I think, what’s making my D22 drag her feet on her grad school apps. She has such a wonderfully tight group of friends – far beyond anything she had in high school – and she hates the idea of everyone dispersing next year. She is not likely to land anywhere that she knows a single soul next fall, unfortunately.
Thanks @momofboiler1 and @SpreadsheetMom ! I think a lot of this pre-loneliness is really compounded by the fact that he’s so very aware that this is his last year of school, and that he “has to adult” after this. Even before the school year started it felt like he was seeing the end and starting to mourn it a bit. He’s been such a hard worker during the school years, he hasn’t taken up all the social offers that have been extended to him to do fun things and I think he’s regretting some of those choices now. Like last year he skipped at Sunday evening Friendsgiving to do homework. Really? Did he have to? Who knows.
So I think some of this is regret for missed opportunities, realizing how much he really loves his friend group, and sadness in advance at the idea of losing touch with them. He was super close to three other guys on the crew team in HS - they did everything together for four years. And shortly after heading to different colleges they just… lost touch. I think he’s worried about that happening again. Like if you had asked him his senior year of high school, I think he would’ve told you they’d be his best friends forever, groomsmen in his wedding etc but they just drifted apart.
A good number, perhaps most, of his college friends are planning to stay in the Massachusetts or New England area, so I think that’s part of it too - maybe some FOMO going on. But, like you’ve said, he’ll adapt. He’s started training for a marathon and if he keeps up the distance running I’m sure he can find some running clubs. I’ve talked to him about things like meetup and I’m sure there are more just to get like minded folks together for activities, so hopefully something like that could be an option too. He may not get this job, but it seems likely that wherever he DOES land it won’t be where he knows people, so he’ll need to be ready to use some community building skills wherever.
Good luck!
My son is still looking for a summer internship. One place he was excited about had him do some exercises that took 90 minutes or so. Then they did a brief interview. Then he had a 1 hour interview with a team and had to give a 10 minute presentation about a project he has worked on. And he got the rejection this week. So much work for a summer job! It’s very frustrating.
For the first time we had to find a place for him to live next fall and now he’s set for that. He asked to have a 1-bedroom on his own, so we made that happen.
Just to make everyone else feel better my D22 hasn’t done one single thing about the rest of her life which is now only 6 months away. For once in my life I’m being very zen - either she’ll figure it out or she’ll come live at home, do some waitressing or similar and pay rent until she does figure it out.
FWIW, the main reason my son is interviewing now is because he’s an engineer - they hire early. I think most normal jobs don’t post 8-10 months in advance. So I think your Zen attitude is definitely the right place to be for pretty much any normal person.
Hi all. 
Just checking into this forum to see how everyone is doing. My D22 is a tad more relaxed this year, as the fourth year in her program is entirely devoted to research. So she no longer has to worry about exams and the like. But she’s also looking for a job and applying to a few graduate programs and, as such, is still quite busy.
Socially, this year has been somewhat challenging as two of D22’s close friends have already finished their programs and left the UK. And not having classes means she sees fewer people.
LostWife and I are looking forward to spending a few weeks with D22 during the Xmas holidays and then it’s the final 6-month stretch for her. In the UK, graduation ceremonies are spread out - she recently shared with us 4 dates from July to November - we’re hoping she can get a slot in the summer.
Anyway, I can’t believe our kids are nearly done. Best wishes to your D22/S22s on their job searches, grad school applications, or simply figuring out next steps.
An update: D22 has just secured a spot in the July graduation ceremony with a couple of her friends. And now I am looking for flights to the UK. It’s starting to feel real…my little D22 is going to graduate from college!!! 
Looking forward to Thanksgiving! May you all have safe travels and rest and relaxation.
Neither my S22 nor my S25 are coming home for Thanksgiving - it’s just too long a distance and too short of time.
Last year I really panicked a bit when S22 said he wasn’t coming home. His plan was to have Thanksgiving with some fraternity brothers who were there and I told him I’d order him food. Well, he didn’t get me the number of guys until the Monday before, and he didn’t have access to a car, so he couldn’t go to a neighboring town. I thought I had Boston Market set up to deliver and then it just didn’t show on Thanksgiving. Luckily, one of his other friends had family at an AirBnB in town and they invited S22 over. But I was nearly crying at my Thanksgiving, thinking of how I’d failed to get my boy food, and he’d have nothing and blah blah blah (yes, I totally overreacted, I can acknowledge that now.)
Anyhoo, I swore the same thing wouldn’t happen this year. He has a car, so I put in an early order for Thanksgiving dinner for four, plus some additions, from the Whole Foods in the next town. As it got closer it seemed like there were only going to be three guys, but whatever if they have leftovers that’s not a problem. I told him to just get me a final number Monday so I could adjust if needed in time - it needed to be 48 hours before the “ready by” date/time Wednesday at 4:00.
So he calls me last night. “Mom! Can you cancel that meal? I got invited to X’s house in and I’d really like to go.” Sure, I said. Except nope. He called me at 7:00. I had to cancel by 4:00. He still wants to go to his friend’s house. I told him to find someone, I don’t care who, that can get to the Whole Foods the next town over and to just send them the QR code and they can have a nice turkey breast, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, mashed sweet potatoes, green beans, rolls, cranberry sauce and an apple pie. I have no idea who I’m feeding, but some kids at his school who can’t get home are getting a good Thanksgiving dinner (provided they can find a place to heat it up). I’m hoping this is good karma for him and the job interview he has today, since I’m not getting that money back…
Our S22 will be staying on campus again for Thanksgiving. Has not yet settled on plans. There is an excellent deli a few blocks away that sells all the Thanksgiving dishes, and you can just go buy what you want by the pound. But each year he goes out to a restaurant instead— with no traditional Thanksgiving food whatsoever. And each year, even though the Macy’s Thanksgiving parade route runs literally 1 block from his campus, he refuses to go see it! Our children–we are not the boss of them!
My D22’s school only gets Thursday and Friday off for the holiday (they do get a proper fall break in October). While many classes get cancelled on Wednesday not all do and this year she has an afternoon class that is not cancelled. Fortunately we are only a couple hours’ drive so she’ll be home by 5:30 Wednesdays night - right in time to head out with her HS friends! But I can’t complain since she’s close enough that I tend to see her every 4-6 weeks regardless. And a long weekend is still a long weekend!
You are a good mama!
My D22 is at a school where they have residential colleges, and the magisters of each college typically host Thanksgiving dinner for any students who don’t go home.
So it wouldn’t have occurred to me to send her dinner – because she’d probably change her plans last minute like your kid, lol.
She’s getting on a flight right now to come home, except we have thunderstorms here and flights are getting delayed right and left, so I’m holding my breath. 
Good luck to all the kids submitting grad school apps!! The wait begins!
Good luck! S22 still has quite a few applications left. Those due in early December are done, but there is a big batch due in the middle of December and another one due in January. It doesn’t help that he keeps changing his list 
One of his recommenders submitted his LOR either yesterday or early today for apps due tonight. S22 seems very laid back about it all. I on the other hand not so much.
That happened to my son as well. He asked 3 professors back in September (2 of which submitted already to all his schools). Then waiting on the 3rd. He emailed the prof over the weekend because she still hadn’t submitted and he had 2 apps due today. He was stressing out all weekend. But she finally submitted for those 2 schools. But of course he has some apps due tomorrow, some due the 9th and the 15th so we have to patiently wait for her to submit. This is more stressful than college apps!
OMGosh. I post over in Class of 2026 thread for my current senior mostly, and I detailed this saga over there – but D22 had two of her ten apps due tonight. The third letter still wasn’t in this morning, so she sent a polite email. Professor said she was on it.
Apparently there was some snafu when she tried to send it this afternoon, but D22 texted her at 8:45pm, and then called her after 10pm. Long story short, the letter was submitted with only 40 minutes to spare.
WHAT the heck. I think I lost years off my life, lol.
So, two apps out of ten are submitted. She has three more due December 15, then some January 15 and Feb 1. This is WAY more stressful than undergrad!
My S22 has submitted one graduate application, for the only program he’s interested in, and has also applied for a fellowship with a sports ownership group. He’s also going to interview for his former boss’s job as head of his university’s intramural program — would be wild as a first job, but he’s actually qualified for it both academically and by experience. We’ll see!
That’s really crazy. I thought my son’s recommender was an exception, but it looks like many are dealing with the same scenario, though 40 min before the deadline is in its own category 
I really don’t understand why professors cannot submit their letters a week ahead of time.
S22 knew that this was about to happen as the same professor did the very same thing when it came to S22 scholarships both this year and last year. Luckily, I was completely unaware then. I wasn’t brave enough to ask S22 if he submitted the LOR due Dec 2, 4 and 5. Let’s hope so.
BTW What are your kids doing about the questions asking what other grad schools they are applying to? I found it rather annoying and in the “none of your business” category. S22 is ignoring them though there was one school that required an answer. I think he put his current university and TBD there 
Good luck to all grad school applicants. Let’s hope for good results including full funding. I don’t know about you, but S22 has no plan B if nothing pans out.