Thank you! I know dating is not the most important consideration. However, after 4 years at an all boys high school it would be nice to interact with more women. (Not just for dating but for the life skill and emotional development!)
6 Likes
FWIW, this is my older son’s biggest complaint about WPI. The years before he started, they had a donor who gave VERY large scholarships to women. It helped attract more women to accept their offers and the school, the year he applied, was 55% men, 45% women. Excellent for a STEM school! Then that benefactor died, and the will didn’t include the scholarship fund. The percentage of women in entering classes has dropped every year. This year’s freshman class I heard was more like 75% men, 25% women. Worcester does have some other good size schools (Holy Cross, Clark, even Worcester State) but people tend to socialize on their own campus. He loves the school, does not love the gender imbalance.
5 Likes
You’d think so, but while both of course have the in-state merit scholarships, Fairbanks was willing to throw more money in, whereas Anchorage didn’t. (Part of this is, I suspect, an outgrowth of the fact that Fairbanks gets more state funding per student than Anchorage does.)
We could technically make the trustee admitted student day because it’s the first Sunday of spring break here, but C25 would be so beyond jetlagged (four hour time difference, redeye flights would be involved) that it really wouldn’t be worth it.
This, to be honest, is my biggest reservation about the three medium sized tech schools that our son got into (mines, aka “MINES!”, RPI, WPI).
He’s never been on a date. He has told me, blushing furiously, that he does, in fact, like girls. But his friends are almost all guys. Just met with a woman from my church whose son went to WPI and is now living a monk-like existence, happily ensconced in his job, no partner in sight, at age 30. Not to borrow trouble, but this worries me.
(I do not want my only child to be alone.)
14 Likes
We are within driving distance, a much easier lift to visit
2 Likes
Going through something similar feelings at this time with school choices and options with what came back on acceptances and scholarships (or lack of), and for me cost.
3 Likes
It’s totally fair to think of because it can be important to kids at that age. SMWC even has a Rose-Woods brunch at homecoming every year for SMWC + Rose-Hulman couples.
5 Likes
Blockquote
This! My Rose grad met his current girlfriend of 2 years at a party at ISU. His roommate at Rose was dating one of her sorority sisters and introduced them. Having multiple colleges in Terre Haute definitely widens the dating pool!
5 Likes
And I guess I don’t know how to quote posts. LOL
7 Likes
D25 got a surprise acceptance from a state school. She received it in the mail, but the portal hadn’t changed. Apparently they have rolling admissions, which she didn’t realize. It was a nice way to break up the wait. I had even forgotten she applied. lol. I’m still worried that March will bring heartache, so here’s hoping she decides to get excited about one of the acceptances she has in her pocket. Maybe she’ll decide the state school is a good one for her.
22 Likes
We had a little surprise too. S25 received an unexpected email from Muhlenberg that they are receiving a talent scholarship. Added on to the merit they already received, it’s now one of their most affordable options!
24 Likes
We’ve known all along that D25’s list is a weird mixture of schools with stellar academics with not-so-great dance, a lot of schools that are reasonably strong in both but that are significantly easier to get into academically than for dance, and some that are strong in dance and not-so-great academically. It’s hitting D25, hard, that all her academic work isn’t going to make up for a poor audition. She got her first real rejection artistically this week (from a school she has been admitted to academically, with $, and in their honors program). That specific rejection didn’t sting too much, bc she didn’t love the program at the audition. But it’s clearly messing with her a bit now, as she’s brought up this whole process, the pressure, and the frustration that she doesn’t feel like she’s dancing her best right now. She’s been sick for a week–culminating with sleeping for 15+ hours on Tuesday–and is now trying to dance and make up work before we get on a plane tomorrow for an audition. January (and now the beginning of February) have been physically rough on her; short of just nixing some auditions, I don’t see an easy way to change that in the next three weeks.
My prayer all along is that she feels good about what she puts out there and then to let doors open/close as they will. I’d appreciate any echoes of this you want to throw out there, too. I’m feeling a little discouraged for her, frankly, and would like to be genuinely positive for her as I support her. Thanks, all!
28 Likes
That sounds so tough, especially with everything she’s juggling. She’s showing so much resilience by pushing through. I hope she finds a moment of confidence in these next auditions. Sending good thoughts that she feels proud of all she’s accomplished, no matter what doors open or close.
8 Likes
I have, at least three times now, had friends bring their kids up to WPI and had them walk around with S22 or chat with him about the school. All three times he’s brought up the gender imbalance as the biggest con of the school. It’s definitely a thing. A decent number of his friends were dating girls in HS and are still dating them, several years later. S22 was briefly “talking to” and then at least hanging out a few times, a girl from Wellsley - which isn’t close, but I gather a fraternity brother dating a Wellsley girl introduced them. There clearly are women on campus - but, for example, we just got the list of students going to his location for their term long study abroad project - it’s 16 boys and 8 girls. It seems like a lot of things are like that. It is a thing to note, for sure. And, frankly, it’s really disappointing how quickly it’s changed. The more even gender balance was a plus factor when we were originally ranking schools - not because we were necessarily shopping for potential girlfriend material, but because a diverse campus was important to him. The good news is that, despite the gender imbalance, there is a fair amount of other diversity, racial and ethnic, yes, but it’s also a really welcoming school for the LGBTQ+ community. So it’s got balance, just not ALL the balance.
[Editing to add because I forgot it the first time - I’m really hoping the school sees what has happened with admissions the last few years - women are taking higher scholarships at other schools I suspect - and does more to recruit and retain young women. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t love that people get different money awards based on gender, but that’s sort of the way life works. And plus, the school has a vested interest in making a balanced community and in recruiting and admitting to gain that balance. So I don’t let it bother me, because I really do agree with the end goal of balancing the student body as much as practicable.]
S22 is a sociable attractive guy, so I’m sure he’ll eventually have a girlfriend, but knowing that he’s going from a majority male college, into a majority male profession, and those are two easy places to meet people to practice those early dating skills, does make me wonder. That said, I didn’t date at all in HS, college, or most of law school. When I was in my last year of law school I went to a corporate party with a friend who was a year older (mostly to get the free food and booze) and she invited a guy to join us - he was eventually the first person to take me out on a date. We’ve been married almost 23 years. Maybe I committed to the first guy I dated, or maybe I just found the right guy the first time out. So who knows, maybe our kids will all just stumble into the right people like I did.
18 Likes
My D23 graduated from a top 10 boarding school where at least 30 of the class of 150 graduates go on to Ivy’s and the probably 50 to T20 etc. she thought fit didn’t matter and got into Hamilton and Colgate, and her safeties including full tuition at Pitt. She chose prestige of a top LAC. Hated it, didn’t go back after a semester. Took a semester and applied to other schools, but since she had attended college was not eligible for many freshman scholarships. And could not even apply to Pitt as a transfer because she didn’t have enough credit. She is now at St. Olaf. Which was not even a consideration the first round. They gave her 37k in scholarships. And she is LOVING it. Loving the professors, classes and social life. So fit does matter and schools without the “prestige” can actually have better academics. I hope he can let the prestige factor go and can fall in love with one of his options. Good luck!
25 Likes
Sending all the hugs. We went through this with d22, and in the end, she found the perfect unicorn for her, but getting there wasn’t easy.
6 Likes
Now to reply to the 600 posts I have missed in 2 weeks! No way to catch up on all. I got to spend a week out of the Northern cold for work in Miami which was nice!
S25 finally got his drivers license, 5 months after his pilots license 
. And he bought his dream car from a family friend for a really good deal. Now he needs a job!
Here are results to date:
Rensselaer - accepted in Aerospace Engineering waiting on financials
Pitt Engineering- accepted waiting on financial (could be in his portal he hasn’t checked in weeks)
VA Tech - waiting should hear this month. He applied to Corps of Cadets
NROTC scholarship- waiting
AFROTC scholarship-waiting
U of SC - waiting
USMMA - waiting on medical waiver, they just asked for a signed statement from him 2.5 weeks ago, so hoping waiver comes soon. He has a letter of assurance and the waiver is the last hurdle.
USNA and USAFA - same waiting and would need a waiver but he doesn’t have LOA’s
He is not doing his sport this spring or band or Jazz band, just going to the gym. And will do rocketry with JROTC and a small bit of volunteer work. He is so ready to be done with HS.
15 Likes
I Can Not get my S25 to do enough behind the wheel hours to get his drivers license! He’s got a summer job lined up - but will need to drive to get there. And right now I’m like huh, that’s going to be a miracle. Sigh.
Good luck with the schools/scholarships/whatnot you’re waiting for! My older son has a really close friend in the Corps of Cadets at VT and the kid Loves It. He originally wanted the Naval Academy, but a different kid from our HS was recruited there to row (and while our HS has been lucky - one kid a year for the last five years at USNA - it’s only one) so he pivoted. VT was his backup at the time and he was pretty disappointed, but the Corps, and his experience, has been great and he’s really happy.
7 Likes
Good to hear! We have not visited any of his schools except Pitt, and USNA. Trying to schedule one to USMMA. Hopefully will have enough time to visit them if he doesn’t get into USMMA, as that and USNA are his top choices. But I think he would be totally happy with ROTC at any of these. Both of my brothers and father in law went to Tech.
He bought his car before he had his license. It was a 13 hour drive home on the highway and he did it all- and it’s a stick shift that because of his computer gaming he was able to just get in and drive. Getting the car gave him the motivation he needed. We also had him do a 6 hour behind the wheel course.
4 Likes
We are having some of the same issues here, just substitute music for dance. He said the exact same thing last weekend. “It’s so frustrating that an 8 minute audition can undo 4 years of hard academic work”. While I know that’s not quite true, I also understand the sentiment.
All I can say is hang in there! Sending good vibes for the next few weeks!
8 Likes