What I’ve noticed with talking to my D26 about ECs is that I do constantly have to watch myself when giving her advice or talking to her about her options, so that she doesn’t see my comments as being about what will be most advantageous for college (even when I’m not thinking about that at all).
D currently has a fairly substantial EC that she’s thinking about dropping. It takes up a lot of time during her week and weekend. Typical of my D, she’s having a very hard time deciding (D is notorious in our family for never being able to decide things 
). I keep trying to help her to figure out what she actually wants to do… but it’s hard for her to separate that from “what would look better on college apps.”
I can’t imagine what it would be like if we had a paid professional advising her on her ECs!