We do and her S24 is the polar opposite floundering after freshman year- has changed his major three times, still unsure, etc., etc. Which is FINE. So many people have no idea, even as adults. But I am thrilled she is excited about it.
Weāll be empty nesters after D26 goes to college, and Iām still figuring out what I want to do then! Because then Iāll really be a grown-up, LOL. ![]()
That is wonderful that your son has colleges on both coasts! Great list! Mine wants to stay at the most 6.5 hours from home.
S26 has LACs, medium-sized schools, and large schools on his list. He is not very transparent as far as which school he is leaning towards. One of his preferences is that the campus is within a walking distance of shops/dining. He LOVED Kenyon and its program, but the very limited walkable places kept him from going ED.
@SpreadsheetMom that is amazing that sheās got a draft written AND that she already got some feedback! S26 knows what to write about, has an outline, but has yet to write a draft. While he considers himself a writer, writing about himself is challenging to him.
I think this is probably true for many kids. I know mine had trouble because she said everything she wrote about herself sounded obnoxious and pompous, like she was bragging. She had a much easier time just telling the funny stories about her creative escapades, then got stuck when she had to make it all mean something, lol!
I was the same way. I was very particular about the right kind of marching band (I was color guard). I marched corps style all throughout high school and wanted something different, so it ruled out a lot of schools.
Similarly, D26 has been just as particular about college athletics. Only the right kind of team will do.
How does color guard perform differently in a band that isnāt corp style? Did you find what you were looking for?
He really wants a different experience from CA. Iād be happiest if he ended up at Washington or Boulder, as itās a short flight. But Iām in NYC for work at least 3-4 times a year so I donāt mind the east coast/NYC in particular. We lived in NYC until D22 was 6 and S26 was 2. We took them back pretty regularly for a while, and my best friend lives there. So I think it doesnāt feel quite so scary to him.
That said, D22 was keen to be on the east coast and ended up at UCLA. Kenyon was in her top three but, in the end, the energy and opportunity in LA was too good to resist.
I think it helps to have a few different types of schools in the mixāeven ones that they arenāt into during the application (we insisted D22 apply to UCs, as she was very keen to go east). But who they are today is not who theyāll be in April/May. I guess if I learned anything from D22ās experience, itās that this is a wild ride and thereās just no way to know what will happen.
DH and I lived in NYC for six years right out of college, and got married halfway through that time. We moved south before having kids, but I always wondered what it would be like to have no car ā but a mac daddy stroller ā with small kids in the city. ![]()
My D22 fancies herself a New Yorker because sheās been so often to see shows (sheās a hardcore musical theatre nerd). But sheās in L.A. this weekend with friends to see a show. Sheās never been before. (Heck, Iāve never been to L.A. before, lol.) Canāt wait to hear about it.
I worry that D26 is limiting herself with only 6 schools on her list, although I feel like weāve exhausted the combo of specific major plus acceptable size of school plus location plus marching/pep band. Unless sheās willing to look farther west OR consider selective schools that would require a bunch of essays (both Cornell and Carnegie Mellon would fit the bill there), we canāt seem to find more schools that would work.
This is so true and something thatās so hard for S26 to grasp sometimes. Yes, a wild ride indeed! After guiding S23 and S20 through this process, Iāve learned to cast a wide net, nudge lots, and be prepared for whatever will happen!
We lived in Park Slope, Brooklyn when the kids were little. It was like raising them on Sesame Street. Summer block parties, Halloween parades, sprinklers in the parks, neighbors and shopkeepers who knew them by name. D22 went to kindergarten in a red schoolhouse right across the street from our apartment. I loved it.
There were downsidesāthe schlep up to our small walkup apartment, it was expensive, it was far from our families in CA (which is why we moved back to CA when my husbandās company wanted to relocate him to SF). But raising children in NYC can be a dream if you can make it work!
I hope your D22 has a great time in LA. I love it there. I donāt know where you are, but my D22 is spending the summer in the south! Her internship is in ATL. Sheād never been there beforeāand is having a great time.
I think itās great your D26 has specific criteria for what she wants in a school. And maybe as the application season goes on, she will be more interested in venturing farther from home!
Haha, we live in ATL! Small world. ![]()
We lived in Brooklyn Heights for three years after we got married and had lots of friends in Park Slope, so I totally get that life. I miss it, but the expense and the lack of space got to us after awhile. I donāt know if I could do it now. But it was an absolute blast in our 20s!
D26 is enjoying her last 2 wk of freedom before school starts.
Iām frustrated with having to wait again for U of Aās honors college to post its updated application instructions. A few days ago, it said they were going to publish by 7/15. Then on Fri, the website was updated to say theyāll post it by 7/25. HURRY THE HECK UP, PEOPLE! Donāt yāall realize Iām sitting here waiting? ![]()
Meanwhile, D26 is ā ![]()
She said something very level headed the other day. āYou know, the only reason why Iām not going to be applying all over the place is because I lucked out and found a good school thatās not at home but isnāt too far away and it has a good program that I like.ā
Weāve researched a boatload of schools and the application list still remains at a grand total of 3.
Lots have been ruled out for various reasons:
- expensive
- major requires too much math
- too far away for D26ās comfort level
- too close to home
- too cold
- major requires too many business classes
- campus culture not a good fit
- diversity not the right mix of people D26ās looking for
- reach + too expensive based on NPC
- too much Greek life focus on campus
- campus life requires having a car
I wanted a more military-esque style since I did corps for a many years, and I didnāt want to be on TV during halftime in spandex. I did find it, though shortly after I graduated, they pivoted to corps.
Solidarity! D26ās list consists of her ED1, EA and a ED2 if ED1 falls through.
Her ED1 school hasnāt posted their supplemental essay prompt, so sheās a bit grumpy about that.
Her common essay is a work in progress. She also has difficulty with the self reflection part, and it is a clear stumbling block. Sheāll work through it.
We have mostly what should be matches/likelies for C26 but Iām still panicking because of course I am.
At the moment the list has
2 reaches
1 that is both a reach and a safety depending on first choice vs alternative major (CPP)
4 likelies (including top choice)
1 further safety
This is my own classification where safety means 100% chance of admission. Anything other than auto admit and I have it under likely. And yes somehow there donāt seem to be any actual target schools (unless you count the collegevine classification;) )
Theyāre still debating a couple of others, and a couple on the list are not ideal. I feel for some others here with how specifics narrow it down: C26 ideally wants a 4 year BS majoring in architecture (a couple on the list are 5 year and a couple have secondary admission to major, one overlap between those, neither of which is ideal), blue/purple state, not too far (subjective), in a nice place (subjective). Wanting that major (already limited in terms of which colleges offer) in a college that is not very selective is really an issue in widening choices. We are flying a bit blind with how colleges will interpret GPA (with improvement/counselor explanation/ SAT that is above 75th percentile almost everywhere they apply, but knowing GPA is probably most important).
My D26 currently has 15 schools on her spreadsheet; she wants to pare that down to no more than 10. They include 1 sure bet school, 5 likely schools (including our flagship), 6 target schools and 3 reaches.
She is having issues with her personal essay. She doesnāt like the one she submitted for her junior English class, but she says she has another idea (one that she isnāt yet ready to share). AFAIK, this essay is still in the planning stages (in other words, no actual writing has yet to be done). The remainder of the summer is going to be stressful, I fear.
I think Iāve already posted this a couple times, lol, but my kidās current (final?) list is six schools ā
Georgia Tech
RIT
WPI
Miami Ohio
Pitt
UAH
Georgia Tech should be the only reach, but she has a decent shot being in-state and female, plus her high school has a good track record of sending lots of kids to Tech. That said, the major she wants is in the College of Computing (Computational Media), which is one of the most competitive programs to get into. So no guarantees at all. The major itself is more coding-heavy than she wants with not enough design, but itās close enough that itās worth applying. And with her stats, tuition will be nearly free with an in-state merit scholarship. The band does have an audition, but sheās sure to get in. Unfortunately she has several friends that have marched at Tech for a year or two and then dropped because academics just got too time-consuming. She hates the idea of that.
RIT, WPI and Miami Ohio should all be targets, and all offer pretty good merit, so fingers crossed. RIT doesnāt have a marching band (no football), but they do have a big fun pep band that plays for hockey games (which are huge, apparently). This appeals to D26 because itās different than anything sheās done. WPI and Miami Ohio both have low-stress marching bands with band camp and everything, so thatās more what she knows. If she gets into all three with reasonable merit, then sheāll have to go through the pros and cons of each and see which aligns the best (maybe sheāll want something totally different in the spring, who knows).
Pitt is an outlier ā bigger than she wants, with a bigger (and not guaranteed) marching band. But sheās intrigued by the city, and sheās also intrigued by the Digital Storytelling major, which is also perhaps too coding-heavy and light on design, but still appealing enough to add Pitt to the list. Plus the rolling admissions thing is nice.
UAH is a pure safety ā itās not too far from us, warm weather, fantastic dorms with single rooms, good honors program, small pep band, and theyāre offering a brand new game design major fall of 2026. Also, it would be mostly free with a national merit scholarship.
There are other schools weāve looked at that come kind of close ā Drexel, Duquesne, DePaul, University of Rochester ā but have been eliminated for one reason or another. And I swear I look every day to try to find that hidden gem, but so far, no dice. Her stats are really good, so she could aim for more selective schools if she wants ā but sheās really not interested. Sheād rather have the merit money and assurance of getting in at a mid-tier school, plus she doesnāt want to write supplemental essays. (Opposite of my D22, lol.) So I think it might just be these six!
(ETA ā kid left early for band camp today, and she hauled all her luggage downstairs with a sword strapped across her back. I was like, umā¦what? Well, she takes the themed dress days very seriously, and Friday is āgame dayā ā so she crafted an entire Link costume. Because of course she did. So I really think she needs to go to RIT or WPI where sheāll find her people, lol.)
D26ās school senior events include the senior sunrise, senior sunset, elementary school walk, and an awards luncheon. They used to be able to paint their parking spaces but since the school repaved the parking lot, they are not allowing it this year. I donāt know how many D26 will take part in since she doesnāt have very many close friends in her grade level.
Our family has some financial difficulties during the kidsā childhoods do we were never really able to put much aside for college. We made agreements with both kids that we would help them with tuition or whatever loans they had to take, depending on finances. S23 chose a very expensive college, but received a little over half in scholarships and grants. He took the rest in a loan. D26 is much more practical and wants a smaller sticker price.
D26 would love to go far away, but my husband is not on board. Sheād also love to be close to NYC since she wants to be a film or communications major. I actually donāt know if sheāll apply to any true reach schools- it seems like a waste of money.
She has the theme for her essay but hasnāt stated writing yet- sheās been doing theatre camp and volleyball- she also has a load of summer reading since sheās taking two English classes. But she knows she needs to get started. Sheās also re-taking the SAT in September so has to study for that.
I have to admit- the hardest thing for me as a parent is letting her navigate everything. I am the definition of helicopter mom but I have to allow her to achieve her goals on her own. I can help but I canāt lead.
Despite this being my 3rd time going through this college process, I still panic once in awhile lol. Iām sure itās part hormonal (hello, menopause!), but I think itās also because I know too much about this crazy college process compared to when my first two kids were going through it. I tend to overthink things too, and maybe because deep down, I didnāt guide my first 2 as well as I could have. So Iām guiding, but letting S26 decide.
S26ās list ballooned to 14 schools!
My D has 17 on her list right now, and she might add another ![]()
She is still figuring out what she wants, so I feel this is a great time to expand her list to cover everything she MIGHT want⦠then when she gets down to brass tacks and lists all the supplementals sheāll need to write, I expect sheāll cut some.
Iām enjoying how she has expanded her thinking to include possible schools all over the world, and different majors she hadnāt considered before.