The fact that we all know who we are talking about without anyone mentioning the poster’s name, speaks volumes…
7 Likes
Of course. And their safeties are often their state flagship which is nothing like any of the schools they are asking questions about. It’s their way of telegraphing their parents are willing to pay full freight for only those colleges. When I see that, I back off.
2 Likes
I thought about posting a “Chance Me” for D26, but decided against it as her landscape is slightly different because of athletic recruiting. I really didn’t feel like having to wade through a bunch of well meaning comments that had little relevance to D26’s situation.
2 Likes
I have shied away from doing a chance me thread for D26.
Partly because I do not want to argue with internet strangers on the affordability of schools or why certain in-state 90+% acceptance rates are not a good fit (not because of the ease of getting in- but the potential culture) …
But also- I guess that with D26 looking at engineering/CS type of paths- there are so many threads that I can just comb through them and pick out the relevant bits that pertain to us 
without the headache of being told that the B she made sophomore year implies that she will never be able to handle an engineering program 
or are you sure you can afford that (and even if you can- why would you do it…)
We are benefiting off the sacrifices of others lol 
4 Likes
Have any of you tried using a genAI tool for match me type things? I’ll admit when I tried the responses are pretty generic. I basically get the same list of schools that the chancers on CC list!
I find it annoying.
I dont go around asking people why they have a Louis Vuitton bag when the Walmart one is completely functional or tell someone who drives a Mercedes that a Camry is probably more reliable and a better deal.
6 Likes
Totally agree. We are full pay for D26. The schools that were recruiting her do not offer merit aid. We do not qualify for need based aid. We made our peace with it and while there may be more affordable options, we are fortunate enough for her to be able to afford her apply ED1 at the school she found to be her best fit academically and athletically. Do I think she can get a comparable education for less money? For sure. But, I already know this and don’t need a bunch of people on the internet dogpiling on me over something we’ve already accepted.
5 Likes
Yes… and it gave me so many COMPLETELY wrong bits of information that I felt worried about other people using it.
3 Likes
Nope. Most AI stuff produces poop right now.
2 Likes
When I tried it was not only wrong about lots of stuff like majors/programs/etc., but it still pushed the same list of schools that lots of people here promote. I mean, it’s pulling data from here among other places, so if people don’t post about it then it doesn’t seem to know.
1 Like
Exactly. People who are full pay understand ROI. They arent stupid.
For me, college was 4 of the best years of my life. People always talk about finding the right fit and then question why they arent going to XYZ school because it’s less.
D24 is having the time of her life. She has a 4.0, writes for the school paper (is going to DC because she was nominated by the Collegeiate Media for an article she wrote last year), in the student senate, is a teaching assistant for 2 of her professors and met 5 amazing roommates.
She couldve gone to UConn for free (based on her grades) and she didnt want to go because she didnt want a large school in the middle of nowhere.
We invested in 529 plans for this exact reason. Im so happy we can give this to her just like some people are thrilled taking a trip around the world.
8 Likes
We feel the same way. Fit is 100% the priority for D26 because we are in the fortunate position that we can do that. We can find a quality education cheaper than almost all of the schools on her list. But, our view is that the college years are about so much more than just “ROI.” Between diligent saving in 529s and what we already pay for her high school, none of her schools total cost would result in us spending more than we do now, with no loans and no debt for her. So, we have told her we can afford wherever she wants to go, so find the place that is right for you. And, our view is, we can’t take the money with us when we die and there is nothing that aligns with our values more than spending it on education. We don’t have the fanciest house, we drive very practical cars for a decade plus. This is where we get joy in spending. It is valuable to us that she get the best experience for her. She may actually end up at the cheapest school on her list. But that is because it is a great fit just like the most expensive one is.
5 Likes
It’s been 30 years so I’m not 100% clear in my head, but my recollection is that these BAD LORs were almost exclusively written by practitioners rather than the applicants teachers. There were Teachers in the ‘Meh’ column for sure though.
Yes, I’ve politely declined writing a few LORs for Veterinary School applicants with “I think you need to find someone who knows you much better than I do and can relay as much in a letter of this much importance” or something along those lines.
1 Like
Yes. Same exact situation here. In fact, I think our kids are at the same school. I admit I did struggle with paying so much because she could have gone in-state for almost free, but the fit is exactly right for her – she’s a senior now, and she doesn’t want to leave, LOL.
I didn’t have a great experience in college – my parents didn’t go to college in the U.S., so I didn’t really have support or know much about exploring fit or anything like that. So I went to the large state flagship that all of my friends went to – got a scholarship – and that was that. In hindsight, it was a terrible fit, and I would have gotten so much more out of a different type of school. (It turned out okay – got a plum internship that led to a dream city where I found an interesting career and a spouse, so all ended well, lol.)
But DH and I both wanted more for our kid, and thankfully she landed in the right place for her, and we are very very lucky to be able to afford it.
4 Likes
D26 submitted another application last night!
From her current list: 5 down and 2 to go!!!
The only real hold back has been the messed-up emails for LORs through School Links- but that has been worked out and those ‘should’ get sent out this next week!!!
1 more application should be finished this next weekend. Supplemental essay is done- now just letting it sit for a bit and then relooking at it to make sure she still likes it ;-).
Then only one more left on the list- but can’t apply until mid-Oct. (very easy application- so as soon as it opens up- it should take less than an hour to fill it out and double check it! No essays needed)
5 of the 7 should have admission decisions before the Christmas break (1 already came through)
RIT doesn’t come out until end of January- so that is going to drive her a bit nuts!!!
Still trying to work out a time to visit- but she has moved this one up on the list as a top 3 tie.
So a visit is really needed to either solidify its place on her list- or to knock it off 
It is getting real!!!
Finalized our Ireland trip for next month- so University of Limerick will either be solidly on the top 3 list or get knocked off pretty soon!
That is the school that worries the most if she decides that it is still a top choice- with all the political stuff going on and US giving international students a hard time with visas- will other countries start doing the same to us?! Will she get down to the final planning and then have this school taken away and at a time when it may be too late to pivot to one of the others on her list?
Makes me nervous!!!
5 Likes
Same here—I went to a huge state school and probably would have been better off socially and experienced more intellectually in a different environment. But I did make good friends and launch a successful, interesting career.
That said, my D22 chose a huge in-state school (much better ranked than mine) and it has been great for her. I had hoped she would choose the kind of school I wished I had gone to—a small liberal arts school. But I can see 3 years later that she has blossomed and grown from her experiences there and she doesn’t want to leave either!
The price tag has certainly been blissful these last few years but we are in a position to pay for the schools our children choose. I’m grateful we are able to do that.
I did a chance me thread for her 4 years ago and got into quite the back and forth with the poster folks are referencing, about how I chose to spend my money. I told them it was not their concern but they really didn’t let go. Seems that they think it’s their job to save people from their own choices. It was annoying to me, but I’ve seen them really spin up teenagers and it’s pretty upsetting.
I won’t do a chance me for S26 bc I have hung out here long enough to pretty much know how it will play out and bc I know more about how to assess this myself. But I have gotten great ideas from wonderful CC members about good fits for S26 and his interests which have been really valuable.
3 Likes
I seriously doubt it. Other countries understand the value of attracting smart students. I’ve only ever visited as a tourist, but i assume Ireland has to abide by whatever the EU/schengen approach to student visas is, too.
1 Like
I’m with you on RIT – it’s also in the top three for my kid. We did visit in Feb when the weather was miserable, but I think after all acceptances are in hand, she’ll need to go to an accepted students day to make a final decision between a few choices.
I think her last two are expected end of January, which is better than late March for my D22! (THAT was painful.)
I don’t think a student visa in Ireland will be a problem. I do know someone with a slightly different issue – my friend’s daughter (US citizen) got her master’s in history from University College Dublin, and she got a job in the country working in a museum. But her job does not qualify as an “essential skills” position to get an extended work permit, nor does it pay enough to meet the threshold. Her other option is to become fluent in Irish, which she does not have enough time to do. So unless she can find another job quickly that meets the qualifications – and it’s looking doubtful – she has to leave. 
Things I hadn’t really considered before.
University of Limerick just sounds like a great school.
Where do you go to school? The University of Limerick.
Yep, when studying abroad one always has to look carefully into what the options for staying are, should the student want that, also bearing in mind that these can change as well. These can vary dramatically by country, or within a country over time (I am pretty sure the UK graduate visa wasn’t an option when I studied there, and there is no guarantee it will stay forever now, as an example.) ultimately the student has to always be prepared to return home - just as CC tells internationals when they talk about applying here hoping to work here.