<p>This thread has reflected the impossibility of attaching rules or making generalizations about relationships at boarding school. Not exactly surprising since we can’t do it ourselves as adults. About the only thing that does seem true is that a black and white view is unrealistic, as are restrictions, pre-conditions and any other enticing parental ideas about managing an adolescent while away at school. </p>
<p>This is the beginning of trial and error for the kids. The values they take with them to School will inform, but not necessarily control their behavior. Real, cringe-worthy mistakes will be made! Most of the time they have small consequences, a temporary broken heart, a bad set of grades, a call home from the School or the like. Only occasionally are the mistakes more serious, a rarity really. </p>
<p>A few kids and families will sail through boarding school without a scratch, but most of the rest of us have a few dings here and there for our efforts. It’s not just success at the amazing academics, sports and ECs that will make you proud of your boarding school graduate, it’s the personal learning, those bumps and scrapes with life (including relationships), that he or she absorbed in your absence and without your advice. This is part of any good boarding school’s value proposition.</p>