Parent's Remorse?

<p>Okay, you might think I'm strange, but now that the initial aura and excitement has worn off about my son being accepted for the 2014 class, the financial reality of paying for the next four years is starting to set in.</p>

<p>My son could have easily gone to our state Big Ten school and probably have done just fine - at a significantly lower cost obviously. However, we left it up to him to make the decision with our eventual financial and moral support.</p>

<p>Any words of encouragement out there? I know in the long run, this is going to be a fantastic opportunity for him, but I just hope it is worth the incremental cost.</p>

<p>Definitely worth it. Don't worry about the cost when your son is making bank after ND he will pay you back in full.</p>

<p>Think about it like this - you just invested in a long-term, high-yield savings account. You will get more than what you put in in the end</p>

<p>Or you can just think of it like you just bought insurance to make sure that he will never end up under your roof again. :)</p>

<p>ND is as advertised. We have found it to have an amazing sense of community, an engaging academic environment geared to the undergrad, supportive advisement, deep Catholic culture, maniacal sports enthusiasm, bright, decent, grounded students, a beautiful campus and great food. It is not perfect and it is not for everyone. But we don't regret a dollar we send there and we are full pay.</p>

<p>While I cringe when anyone justifies the cost by possible future returns, it cannot be denied that the Notre Dame name has cache. My husband is alum, he will tell you that much of his success, especially early in his career was because of his Notre Dame degree. First, he was well educated and second, the Notre Dame degree inspired confidence in his older clients who were trusting him with 6 and 7 figure sums.</p>

<p>Having said all that, if we could not afford ND, our son would not be attending. We would not borrow $250,000...not even for ND. Only you can decide what you are willing to do.</p>

<p>I hope this helps.</p>

<p>As a recent graduate, I know the financial impact of a ND education. It is immense! However, it is an experience that is unmatched. There aren't many places that you can go to grow in your faith and intellectually. Add on top of that that it is a very prestigious university ranked in the top 20 and you have a very special place.</p>

<p>I do with I had that $100+ thousand that I spent on ND, but I wouldn't change it. I wouldn't be the person I am had I gone to Colorado (my in-state option) and I think that says something.</p>

<p>It isn't just dollars and cents.</p>

<p>It's an investment. Just think of the money people spend on cars that eventually become worthless. I'll just drive my cars longer and invest the difference in my sons education. I don't think we will ever regret it long term.</p>

<p>We passed up a full ride at flagship u for ND for our rising sophomore son. Absolutely no regrets, it was 100% the right decision. He can't wait to go back. He couldn't get the community, academic strength of classes AND student body, or faith dimension anywhere else.</p>

<p>As a parent, it is perfectly understandable to question if the right decision has been made, especially given the cost of tuition at Notre Dame (and even more so in this economy!). You will have no regrets! As the parent of a recent graduate (Spring 2010), we feel that our money has been well spent. Our student has a job-most likely as a result of a Notre Dame alum. Need I say more? I will tell you that the experience at Notre Dame (agree with previous posters^^) was fantastic according to our recent grad. Yes, our grad was offered the full ride/laptop, stipend, room and board, books package at our state Uni. Turned it down and never looked back. The only downside that our student commented on was maybe the weather...but, who can control weather? Your student will be fine-the support is phenomenal! Notre Dame truly is a place that allows students to flourish--and become responsible citizens contributing to communities. You will see!!!</p>

<p>NewND dad,</p>

<p>Feel your pain as son has turned down offers from great places with much more academic and athletic scholarship money. I know the place for him is Notre Dame. He knows the place for him is Notre Dame. When push came to shove and he was placed on the waitlist... the ND alumni community poured out a collective heart for him and spoke in volumes about why he was a Notre Dame family member who should not be denied admission into this class of 2010.</p>

<p>Believe me...there are very few top twenty colleges (Nationally) who have the kind of loving support for it's alumni and family and student prospects as Notre Dame.</p>

<p>It will be a very big stretch for us financially, but Chris is going to the absolute best place for him. I know he will thrive and more importantly I know Notre Dame will guide him on his life decisions as a faithful servant to Christ...and that is what it is all about!</p>

<p>Thanks for your comments everyone! It does help to hear about everyone's experiences. </p>

<p>When I'm asked where my son is going to school I often get nods of the head like I'm crazy because of the cost - but I know deep down that ND is the best place for my son. We are looking forward to being a part of the ND family!</p>

<p>I think of ND as a life investment in my D. Sending her there means making sacrifices for our family. It means she will one day receive less inheritance than she otherwise would. And it means we see a lot less of her than I'd like. But our ND investment will go a long way toward helping her to become the person she is meant to be. </p>

<p>There are better academic schools. There are schools where you're more likely to get a better financial return on your investment. But, for some kids, I think there is no better place than Notre Dame to find your life's calling.</p>

<p>Like many on this board, we are giving up a full ride at a LAC, an IVY league education, and 8k at another school. The cost is very high, but we are counting on ND providing not just a great education and job potential, but a lifetime of memories.</p>

<p>In less than 4 years when you son/daughter is getting ready to graduate ask him/her if it was worth it - then march into Notre Dame Stadium and as you sit there for commencement (and for football games too i guess) you will realize that it was all worth it. </p>

<p>If ND is right for you, you feel it when you walk on campus - it was the first thing that I was drawn to - i know that a lot of people talk about feeling a call to something and I never believed it (i always felt like they were making it up) but when I was at ND for a visit and stay over, i felt like i was called to be there and would not give up any of it.</p>

<p>The ND administrators are counting on sentimental fools such as yourselves so that they don't have to improve financial aid as much as their peer institutions.</p>

<p>^^^
34 caustic remarks in 30 hours. Perhaps a CC record. Thanks for your meaningful contributions.</p>

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<p>You're welcome.</p>

<p>Without a doubt it is money well spent. Like all here, we gave up a full ride to our in state, very good University~thought about it a bit, as in "are we crazy???". But the answer is no. ND is so much more than just a good university~truly! Believe in your decision~you won't regret it! </p>

<p>I just can't believe my daughter is a rising senior, heading back in a day to move in for the summer! She'll be doing undergraduate research (with a grant!!!) and has a great off campus and on campus job.</p>

<p>There is no place like Notre Dame.</p>

<p>I am just curious about a few things. First let me say I love ND. I went to SMC, my husband, 2 brothers, father-in-law, 2 uncles went to ND. I have a son who would have loved to have attended but in 09 he was wait listed and then put on the short list (the one they don't talk too much about) and released from it late last summer. I have a daughter who will apply next year also. The financial cost of college is staggering to say the least. And we are a full pay family. I am positively shocked to see what type of scholarship and/or aid families are giving up to attend ND. If you are paying the full freight, I get it. If you are well off and can afford the $50,000+ price tag, I get that too. But if it is a financial stretch to do it, what makes you take on that burden when your kids have other less expensive options? I know, every one writes about how it is a special place, and it surely is. But knowing it as well as I do, lets face it, it is college. My son has gone elsewhere and thought he would transfer to ND for next year but he has loved his experience elsewhere and will be staying there.<br>
Many of you write about experiences that your student can only find at ND. I have to disagree. Many wonderful colleges and universities offer a strong alumni network, excellent academics and school pride and a sense of community. The economy is very tough and I admire your willingness to sacrifice for your kids. But I agree as laketime in post #4 says that I cringe by the promise of future returns. With this economy many current graduates are looking to grad/law school to further their education in hopes of landing a job. Will you regret the decision to spend the money for undergrad 4 years from now if they want to go to grad school. I know that some may say that grad school is on them but financially speaking you could have paid for both undergrad and grad (going somewhere other than ND) for what you are spending at ND I am truly asking that question because having the prospect of 2 kids full pay in college makes me queasy. How do you make that sacrifice?</p>

<p>Irish Mary,</p>

<p>What sealed the deal for us was the Catholicity of ND. There are many fine athletic, academic, and alumni programs at secular universities. And at schools known as Catholic you can find varying degrees of Catholic culture, or lack thereof. And no other Catholic University, widely recognized as faithful, is as highly regarded as ND in academics. Add in the excitement of national recognized (notice I didn't write nationally ranked.. <em>sigh</em>) sports, Notre Dame is the whole package. It combines a first rate undergraduate education in the context of a Catholic world view. Does it do this perfectly? No. Is this for everyone? No. And for those of you reading this who do not know ND personally, it is not so present that it is palpable to those not seeking it out. Yet it is undeniably still a Catholic school, and not in name only.</p>

<p>I am thrilled that every dorm has a chapel, that dorm Mass is something no one wants to miss, that his rector is a priest,and that two of favorite professors his first year were priests, brilliant men living faithfully.And it is pretty cool that there is a Golden Dome that pays homage to Mary and Touchdown Jesus that is part of his daily venacular. There is a grotto and a basilica and images of Christ and Mary are almost as ubiquitous as cans of Natty Lite.</p>

<p>So many of our son's friends are bright, engaging students who have a Catholic reference point. This is not to say they are choir boys or seminarians or novices. They are far from it. Typical college kids really. And there are plenty there who are not Catholic, or religious at all. And they do just fine.</p>

<p>DS left money on the table from other schools (2 of those offers from other Catholic schools) and 1 offer of admission from a higher ranked school), but for him there really was no place else like Notre Dame.</p>

<p>Well said and having spent four years there I totally understand where you are coming from. I asked the question in light of the current economy. I know many kids getting out of college right now who find themselves with a wonderful education but no job. This includes 2 ND grads. So now the harsh reality of loans and pounding the pavement sets in. I just wonder if they, or their parents, feel it was worth it. There was an interesting post in the parents forum regarding a student at NYU and her debt. It does make one stop and think if cheaper schools are a better choice in the long run. </p>

<p>Placing the blame as student are buried in debt:
<a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/29/your-money/student-loans/29money.html%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/29/your-money/student-loans/29money.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p>This economic situation is strangely similiar to the early 80's when I graduated from college. Luckily, I graduated from SMC with a job as I was an accounting major but many of my friends at SMC/ND found themselves unemployed (Needless to say, several became lawyers!) Of course the debt that we and our parents took on was nothing like today. Perhaps I should ask everyone (including myself) the question four years from now. My husband, the ND grad, has often said that he wonders if it is a better idea to encourage a child to go to a less expensive school (so I am not just talking about ND here) and invest the difference between that and the $250,000 it will eventually cost to go to top private. Then at graduation hand them the check and wish them well. House, car, grad school it can pay for alot. I laugh when he says it, but sometimes I do wonder.</p>