<p>Just wondering what the etiquette is in a busy parking lot when a driver passes a parking space then notices that the car in that space is pulling out. Should all the drivers behind her back up so she can back up and take the space once the car in the parking space leaves? Here’s the background story:</p>
<p>The day after Christmas, I was behind another car in a very busy parking lot as we ■■■■■■■ the parking lot for empty spaces. The driver ahead of me passed a spot when I noticed the car in that space was ready to leave. The car in front of me noticed it, too, slammed on her brakes, put her car in reverse, and expected me to back up out the way so she could take the space. At first, I refused to back up for 2 reasons: 1) there was another car behind me and 2) the car in front of me had already passed the soon-to-be-open parking space. </p>
<p>Eventually, the car behind me backed up, turned around, and left. The driver of the car in front of me got out of her car and asked me to back up so she could take the space opening up. It turned out that I knew the driver in front of me, so I backed up and let her take the space. Needless to say, I was ticked off.</p>
<p>My take on the situation is that if you miss the spot, then too bad. Other opinions?</p>
<p>I would probably have let her have the space. Then again, if I had passed it, I probably would have thought I’d missed my chance. I’d say “*&$#! Missed another one!” Not worth getting too riled up about.</p>
<p>It is not so much a question of etiquette but of safety, she was in the wrong and was asking you to do something that was not safe. I always think of the movie Fried Green Tomatoes when I see people arguing over parking: the scene where the obnoxious young women are laughing because they got to the space before (was it) Kathy Bates and tell her that they have better reflexes because they are young. She just slams into their car and says “yeah, but I have better insurance because I’m old”.</p>
<p>No, no no. The unwritten rule and expected protocol is that once you pass the space, you are out of luck. That woman was out of line. What a jerk.</p>
<p>I had an incident a few years ago on a really busy xmas shopping day at the mall. We were vulturing, and spotted a space about to open up. I pulled around to wait. Another car came up from the opposite direction and also stopped (after I did). The driver backed out in such a way that the opposing driver was able to pull in and I was not. In college (ongoing battle for parking) we learned that the driver who was waiting first has dibs on the space. </p>
<p>After losing that space, we started following shoppers who were leaving. (We also learned that if you scoped a leaver and followed them, you got their space.) We found a candidate, and again we stopped to wait. Again another driver managed to dive into it ahead of us. </p>
<p>At that point, I figure it’s every woman for herself, and we zipped into a spot that someone else was waiting for. He went all roadrage and started screaming profanities as we headed into the mall. Apparently he hadn’t gotten the memo regarding the utter lack of protocol.</p>
<p>colmomto2, I agree with the others that the driver who asked you to back up was completely wrong. </p>
<p>When I’m pulling out of a space in a busy parking lot, I actually pull out in the direction that lets the car that was first in line for my spot, actually get it. I figure creating good karma is a good thing.</p>
<p>I try not to argue with crazy people. Something about parking lots makes a lot of people crazy. I always cede the space and get out of there as quickly as I can.</p>
<p>^ what Hayden said. Sometimes I even motion to the interloper that I am giving the space to the other driver (especially if they have “vultured” me - the vulture gets the spot)</p>
<p>Okay, how many of you will admit it: when you have a prime space, and you know people are salivating over it, you kinda feel good about yourself, if only for that moment?</p>
<p>LOL. If I saw there was a contest over my spot, I would also back out in such a way that the first one there would get the spot. </p>
<p>And I loved that scene in Fried Green Tomatoes. Especially when you hear an onlooker urging her on, and she says “YEAH!” It’s probably the fantasy of the “everyman.” To purposely smash your car into the “mean girl’s car” with relatively few consequences. </p>
<p>Definitely a “Towanda” moment. My two D’s and I sometimes say “Towanda!” in certain applicable situations. :)</p>
<p>^^All of which is why I do my shopping on line :)</p>
<p>In 1981, my parents took me prom dress shopping. I have no idea why my dad went along, probably to drive, since the mall was 2 hours away. He nabbed a spot, not intentionally taking it from anyone else. Mr. Other Driver obviously felt otherwise and proceeded to lace us with profanities. My Dad, Mr. Calm, said, “I’m sorry you feel that way sir.” We went into the mall. He spent the next 2 hours petrified the guy was going to key or slash the tires of our lovely Harvest Gold 1972 Chevrolet Vega. </p>
<p>My mom didn’t take him shopping after that.</p>
<p>The rule is that if the person has to back up to get to the space and there’s a car behind them, then they don’t get the space because they’ve already passed it. (According to the rule maker - i.e. me).</p>
<p>In your situation the driver in front of you should have kept going. Instead she wanted to create a dangerous condition by having 3 cars back up in the middle of a busy parking lot that has walkers and cars pulling in and out just because she was too lazy to find another spot.</p>
<p>I avoid any issue like this by purposely proceeding to a parking spot at the far end of the lot where there are usually empty spots and then I can get some free exercise by walking a bit further to the store. Usually I can park further away and walk the way to the store in less time than the parking spot troller finds and gets parked in the the close spot. I also avoid door dings this way. If the place doesn’t even have spots at the far end of the lot then that’s a signal to me that it’s too busy to go to that store and I don’t bother to park and just keep on driving.</p>
<p>GGD- same here, park in the boonies to avoid dings, if there are no spots in the boonies, I don’t want to go in.</p>
<p>That being said, I remember being a commuter university student and having to park at the end of the row waiting for people to leave. On busy days there would be a car at the end and another halfway down the row.</p>
<p>I am famous for what my friends call my parking mojo. I can sense when a space is going to open up and “feel” an open one from rows away before it’s visible. I somehow manage to get prime, front row parking on even the busiest shopping days. Old fashioned positive thinking, I guess. :)</p>
<p>Exact same happened to me a couple of weeks ago. The woman got out of her far and banged on my window. I was in a good mood chatting with my D and decided it wasn’t worth having a shouting match with someone insane and get worked up. Pleasantly gave up the spot.</p>
<p>How about this situation: I was in the parking lot and saw an open spot up ahead. No one else was around (or so I thought). As I turned left into the spot, a car on the opposite side of the spot had driven by it, saw that it was available, and decided to back into the spot as I was pulling in. Thankfully I saw him before he backed into me. There were other spots available so I just moved on.</p>
<p>That’s my take on the situation, unless you graciously back up and allow that person to have that spot after all. You put yourself in a bad situation in that you got neither the parking spot nor felt the good karma vibe for backing up and letting her have the spot.</p>
<p>I had someone effusively thank me for pulling into a space, and then pulling through to the empty spot in the next row … I <em>always</em> do that if possible so that I don’t have to back up. This person not only thanked me – when I looked puzzled about what I’d done that was so wonderful, explained to me what a nice thing it was to do so that he could take the space behind me (tandem to me).</p>
<p>At any rate, I always try to park on the outskirts and walk in. I hate to vulture cruise.</p>
<p>I had left space for the departing car to pull out, but when the driver in front of me saw that the space was about to open up she backed up and blocked the departing driver from leaving. I actually honked at her to “move on”. Instead of moving on, she got out of her car and asked me to back up.</p>
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<p>I usually do this, too, but the mall parking lot was packed - not a space to be had - which made the space coming open even more valuable.</p>
<p>It’s good to know I am not the only one who thinks if you miss the spot, too bad. If I miss a spot, I simply keep going and vow to pay better attention next time!</p>