<p>When can you say you trust someone? When? When are you nolonger a fool for believing that you and another human being shares some of the same goals and ideals?? God, I looked up to him! This guy overcame his past, beat the cycle of poverty and escaped from a place where drugs are the best outlet, where one should do “whatever hes gotta do to to get what he wants”. He came outta that. And the face he put on was that his biggest care was to help other people out. God, he showed compassion everyday I worked with him! No one is THAT good of an actor. No one can tell that sort of a lie. I did not believe the allegations against him at first. There was no way he was capable of THAT. He had respect. Respect for our guests and clients. Respect for women. And respect for rules. I was sure it was a mistake and that he would be asked to come back to work soon, but this is too much. But today I found my proof that he was not what he seemed. Or rather it found me. Target (the store) called today. Apparently he has also been trying to get items donated to himself in the name the non profit homeless shelter where he used to work. Deep breathes…</p>
<p>…Wow, you need to calm down. Don’t be so idealistic, nobody’s perfect, and some people hide their imperfections (some bigger than others) better than others. Accept that, and you’ll be a lot happier.</p>
<p>Uhm…what?! lol, I’m lost.</p>
<p>Im sorry. I was really mad. Im better now. A co worker that I really looked up to was fired on accusations of sexual assault. I didnt believe any of it until today. I didnt think he was capable of that. At all. But thats life right?</p>
<p>The thing about sexual assault is that it is a power thing. Speaking as somebody who broke that same cycle you described, I know what it’s like to be powerless. Mix that with a personality that’s predisposed to those tendencies and it’s a ticking time bomb. </p>
<p>Although, is there any proof that he actually did it?</p>
<p>Something similar happened to me. I was really good friends with this one guy and we both came from the same place. Drugged out and rundown shacks. I recently found out that he is imprisoned for sexual assault, something I NEVER thought he was capable. Later I came to find out that the woman he supposedly assaulted was drunk (as was he) and that it was consensual by all other reports. </p>
<p>The only moral of that story is to make sure he’s guilty before you lose all faith in him.</p>
<p>tdanielle, please check your PM</p>
<p>To answer the question, there is never anybody that you can trust unconditionally. Not even your parents sometimes. I’ve had the experience of trusting too much in a person whom I shouldn’t have trusted, although I am not allowed to speak of the experience in public. </p>
<p>I’m sorry to hear that your life hasn’t been the best as of late and junk like that has to happen. Sometimes things like that do happen, it’s life. Best thing is to learn from it and put it behind you, although I understand that can be difficult to do.</p>
<p>So there have been allegations that he has developed “more than relationships” with shelter guests since shortly after his employment, he even once admitted to such a “relationship”. This is a BIG fat nono, not only because he is married, but also because it is very unheathly for the guests who we are trying to teach to be independant. Well, something big happened after I left one friday, between female guest, and another male staff member. I am typically informed of all occurances by the other staff members but no one has said anything but alleged sexual assault, no details. The two staff members had been suspended and the incident was going to the board for review (it takes alot to be fired from these jobs, becaue no one else wants them). I was at another volunteers house hanging out with another former guests, who was staying with a volunteer because she just had a baby (at 16yrs old!). She said that the woman has made many such false allegations so I figured that the staff members would be asked to comem back soon, but they were fired instead. Then I got the call from target.</p>
<p>“Well, something big happened after I left one friday with him, a female guest, and another male staff member” I left and then something big happened on shelter grounds between him, a female guest, and another male staff member</p>
<p>A similar thing happened to me last year. Our Quiz Bowl coach, who seemed to be a pretty nice guy, was arrested for allegedly soliciting a minor over to internet. It was a pretty big story in Michigan because our Attorney General caught him in a sting. Luckily, I didn’t look up to him (I barely knew him), so it probably wasn’t nearly as devastating.</p>
<p>Edit: To tell the truth, the only reason I was disappointed was because our Quiz Bowl team was pretty much screwed over…until we found a new coach.</p>
<p>Keep things in perspective. Just because your co-worker was accused of sexual assault, it doesn’t mean everything he’s done or said is a lie, or even that he committed sexual assault.</p>