<p>Perhaps it is a deficit of the English language, but I see lots of posts from parents referring to their sons and daughters as children. For example a post will refer to “my child”. </p>
<p>I find this mentally jarring; to me childhood is over for these (albeit young)adults. I can’t remember anyone calling me a child after elementary school and I certainly wouldn’t refer to my college-age son that way.</p>
<p>I’m even somewhat against referring to college students as “kids”. I had an adult friend ask me about the “kids” and I honestly didn’t connect that to the college students she was meaning. However, I confess that I do sometimes use “kids” in a large family gathering to refer to an entire generation - some of whom now have their own kids now. </p>
<p>Any thoughts on this? When do we promote the “kids” to “grown-up” status, at least linguistically?</p>
<p>I don’t need anymore reason to make me more neurotic. Have I damaged my daughter my calling her kid or child? I think I have enough with all this college admissions frenzy.</p>
<p>I have a son and a daughter, both now over age 18. When referring to them collectively, what would you suggest I call them? My “offspring”? My “progeny”? Sounds kind of stilted to me. Since there is not a more common gender-neutral, plural form of the word “son” or “daughter”, it feels more natural for me to refer to them as “my kids” or “my children”. See <a href=“http://wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=child[/url]”>http://wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=child</a> (definition #2)</p>
<p>LOL. You’re right, of course. My father always said that his children would always be his babies. (But he only said that inside the house and only to us.)</p>
<p>With no living parents, I don’t hear that any more. It would be a pleasure now - although I hated it as a teenager.</p>
<p>Raising my hand, as yes there are occasions I refer to my D as my child especially if someone were to inquire as to whether or not I have children. I would answer, yes I have one child or say my child is a rising senior, etc.</p>
<p>By definition your offspring, your son or daughter is your child regardless of their age. </p>
<p>I think we refer to them as my child or my children because it would I be a little cold to refer them as my male / female offspring. The parents of my peers are in their 70’s/80’s and still refer to their sons & daughters a as their child(ren).</p>
<p>I know that my D knows I am not talking about her in a derogatory way when I refer to her as my child, it doesn’t bother her when I refer to her as my child because that is what she is.</p>
<p>My daughter calls me the “kid” sometimes and I mock she’s the mom. She needs to lighten up a bit…not be so serious! And I was always my dad’s baby, right up until the day he died.</p>
<p>How you treat them and how you refer to them are two different issues.</p>
<p>Not being able to cite names in a forum limits your options to a good degree.</p>
<p>In my case most of it is literary license and style of writing, trying not to repeat the same label too often within a post. I tend to refer to my two either as “son” or “daughter”. (I for one am not a fan of the SS or DD label but that’s just me.) </p>
<p>I’ve used S,D, kid, child, boy, girl, offspring, young adult, progeny as my descriptions in my postings in this forum. There are other labels that have fit very well within the context of a post, referencing the activity, incident, their abilities to cope or not, my personal feelings and reflections in committing the story to cyber-paper. My musician, the fruit of my loins, little rugrats or carpet vermin, beneficiar(y) ies of my estate, bottomless pit are examples that come first to mind.</p>
<p>They’re both recent college graduates and in conversation I normally refer to each singly as either my son or daughter when not by actual name. When decsribing the two together my first choices are still children or kids, not my young adults. Too cumbersome for me.</p>
<p>This isn’t an attempt to denigrate their elevated status as a result of them having attained the plateau of “x” number of years. They’ve been my kids since the time I changed their diapers and wiped their drool. </p>
<p>At the point that they have to perform those same tasks for me, they’re still my “kids.”</p>
<p>When “child” is used by a parent, it’s a designation of order/progeny rather than a designation of age or development. Parents, by definition, have children. Age does not matter. A grandmother speaks both of her children and her grandchildren. A non-parent referring to college students as children (when the context is not “so-and-so’s children are doing well”) or kids is more of a designation of age. Of course, these terms are also used relatively. My father, who is in his mid/late 60s, refers to 35 year old “kids” with some regularity (“There’s this new kid working down at the golf course.”). </p>
<p>Note that I sometimes refer to myself and my friends as “kids.” I’m 18 and going into my 2nd year in college.</p>
<p>There’s a little speech given by the character played by Jason Robards in the movie “Parenthood”…</p>
<p>“It never ends. It’s like your aunt Edna’s a**, it goes on forever and it’s just as frightening.” </p>
<p>Robards goes on to say that no matter the age, your children are always your children…that never changes, you never cross the goal line, you never do your touchdown dance…</p>
<p>I’m over 50 and was the youngest in my group growing up. Those I’m still in touch with from those days still call me “kid”.</p>
<p>Never thought of being referred to as children, kids, etc. was derogatory, just a way of identifying and differentiating.</p>
<p>While a great tongue in cheek comment, it made me wonder what the admission folks used as a label when referring to “our future college students”
when we all sat through the parent presentations during admission visits, accepted student days, etc.</p>
<p>I recall these trained professionals trying to impart the “time to let 'em breathe” message peppering their monologs with more than a singular use of a “your kid” label.</p>
<p>Anybody recall them not slipping repeated into the useage?</p>
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<p>notready4rpurple-
Sorry you lost your parents. That is sad. But it is understandable why you hve trouble wrapping your hands around the term" child". My “kids” will always be my" kids" though when introducing them to people they are my “sons”. The one that always got to me was my late mother-in-law) always referring to her H (my late fa-in-law ) As “daaaaady” (with this childish sounding tone). BTW, my fa-in-law was 75 when I first met him! (he would have been 99 this Friday had he lived a few more weeks).</p>
<p>My D’s grandmother calls her husband (Grandfather or pop-pop) Daaaaddy also with the same childish tone (talk about a :rolleyes: moment) and they are in their 70’s.</p>
<p>Can we call 'em crumbsnatchers?</p>
<p>My chicky tells the dog “come on puppy, lets go see momma duck” and she calls the kids that I work with my ducklings.</p>
<p>My sons are my Ss, at least in writing. When speaking, it sounds, hmmm… , too close to a word which could mean donkeys. They are not my students, thank goodness, but other people’s students. And, for as long as I live, they will be my children. It is a relationship, not an age.</p>
<p>And as others have said, there must be other things to angst over?</p>
Have I damaged my daughter my calling her kid or child? I think I have enough with all this college admissions frenzy.</p>