H never closes his closet door or the pantry door - drives me crazy.
He used to not call and tell me he wouid be late coming home from the office (and he couid be stuck in meetings until midnight or later.) That was the only thing we ever fought about (well I would scream and stomp around and he wouid try to apologize.) Since cell phones it’s not a problem anymore. He still comes home late but now I don’t have to worry he’s overturned in a ditch somewhere.
I often like to relax after dinner. So when it’s my night to rinse dishes and load/start the dishwasher, and she does it while i am taking my customary rest… and then makes a passive-aggressive comment about my not doing them… i get riled up. If I wait an hour to do them, dear, they will still get done. They will be clean and dry in the morning just the same as if they are done right after dinner. Calm down.
@Marian – That is such a strange story. Have you asked him why he doesn’t say your name? I can imagine that would be quite painful. It almost sounds like he’s developed a phobia or something. Does he have other quirks like that? Does he acknowledge the issue (even though he doesn’t explai why?) Is he a punitive person?
@inthegarden how endearing that your H wanted to craft the door for your baby’s room himself. What a lovely thought and it sounds like it was beautiful even if it didn’t fit. Sweet story to tell your child though.
Marian, I am so sorry. I hear the pain in your words.
My peeves: I can’t stand listening to DH. He leaves the cabinet doors and drawers open. Doesn’t clear his place at the the table (I have a nice collection of photographs of what he leaves for me to clean up.)
I’ll stop here before I get really riled up.
inthegarden, DH also went to BxSci. Real life was not in the curriculum. 
Thanks, HarvestMoon1! I was only frustrated because we were due to fly the next day to China to adopt her, and time wax of the essence. But you know what? Turns out we never needed that screened door at all, because she wanted to snuggle every minute and couldn’t stand to be alone in her room anyway!. (We didn’t mind indulging,…I loved the hours reading Toot and Puddle_and letting her nap in my arms, and I don’t think she’s any worse for it. The grumpy old cat also turned out to be surprisingly patient with a baby too, lol. )
Another thing…DD didn’t grow up to be a natural math whiz…but boy, is DH good at getting her up to speed in that department!
@CountingDown, so true! And despite growing up in NYC, I think DH was very sheltered in some other ways too…an interesting bubble…
My H never used affectionate names until I mentioned it to him. The following “sweetie” and Honey" were like chalk on a board. He stopped and I happily let him.
Ok–gross, but he drives me nuts when he rubs his nose and then tires to hold my hand.
He swims and his nose is itchy–but I am slightly germ OCD–so gross to me.
Mr. B is perfect. I make sure that whatever little imperfections he still has are straightened out. 
(It does drive me a bit bonkers that every shelf and tall furniture object in our house is secured too the walls. Our deck can pass 10 inspections with inspectors’ eyes closed. I can’t have any objects on the wall above our bed… If a plant has to be planted, the hole needs to be at least a cubic yard in size and filled with as much topsoil 'cause the plant needs to be nourished… LOL!)
He probably will say that I let our cats have too much freedom and I feed them too much
@coralbrook, “he’s your basic mellow surfer dude type.” Sounds great, can I have him if you pass first?
My H yells at the TV. I finally put my foot down and forbid him to watch the Sunday morning news shows with me. I know, having it heard many, many, many times, exactly how H feels about politics today. I would like to hear what Chuck Todd and his panelists on Meet the Press have to say but if H is in the room all I hear is his running commentary. Drives me nuts. :-@
DH would say I use too much hot water
I would say he uses too much shampoo and conditioner and toothpaste (like on the commercials) and prints too much that could be done on the screen and saved or sent. He likes to hold the paper, I like to save the tree, and the ink.
So, we each are wasteful in our own ways. Luckily we agree on heating and cooling temps!
DH & I work together and it took a few years before it no longer was only my job to make dinner, it annoys him that he wants a big dinner and I don’t, but he cooks his dinner often.
DH is meticulous and one step at a time and a place for everything whilst I am a multi-tasker, file-pile, get to it when I can person. But if we both moved his speed, nothing would get done.
We learned, working together, that if we could both be nice to others working i our office, we could choose to be nice, not snarky, to each other, since we are on the same team, but it took a while
My husband and I went from traditional roles - I quit work to stay home with the kids, he went to work - to the nearly 24/7 togetherness of retirement.
It was a real adjustment. There are some days I love being around him. Other days I just want to be left alone. We finally got to the point where we understood that we both needed personal space. That took a long time, to realize that just because we can’t stand each other (exaggerating) right now doesn’t mean we don’t love each other. Sometimes if it gets heated we just hug each other - even if we really don’t want to, lol - and that helps. We are bound to to annoy each other, but we are stuck with each other ;-p
I’m always early, he’s always on time which to me is late. I get bent out of shape about things easily, he is the rational engineer-type who has learned to let me vent first and give advice later. He snores, I have learned to love my ear plugs. Et cetera.
I’m sure I way more annoying than hubby. For a pet peeve…he’s so loud! He wakes up VERY early 4:30 - 5am, and he feels it’s a perfectly appropriate time to unload the dishwasher - slamming cabinets, ratting pans, etc. I try and suggest a no loud noise before 6am, but he doesn’t even realize how noise travels up to our room, even after demonstrations. He has some hearing loss so I think he doesn’t believe me. His comment is, if it woke me up I was probably ready to be awake anyway.
@Marian as long as he isn’t calling you someone else’s name…I’d just forget about it
@BunsenBurner, at least he is okay with having more than one cat. My DH likes our cat, but is adamant about not having more than one at a time. 
Pointing. I don’t know why words alone aren’t sufficient.
i don’t use my wife’s name either. i always use my nickname / pet name for her.
but if he only says “you” – yeah that is kind of weird
.@prezbucky said:
LOL, my DH would probably have that same pet peeve. Only I don’t say a word, and I’m not even mad about it. He works so hard, and I don’t work much anymore, so I really don’t mind cleaning up afterwards. I just don’t like dishes sitting around in the kitchen, so I feel compelled to go ahead and do them. It bothers him, because he probably feels like I’m not believing that he will actually do them.
It also bothers him that I will open a cabinet and not close it. I don’t do it all the time, just sometimes, and I have no logical explanation for it.
My biggest pet peeve is his driving. I think he drives too fast, insists on driving in the left lane, only brakes when it’s absolutely necessary, and barks at me for being a nervous passenger. I hate car trips, but I don’t do alot of the driving because I have vision issues.
He also yells at the TV during sports and political shows. He knows this gets bad and has banished himself to another room to watch sports when I or the kids tell him to pipe down.
He also gets what I call “bug up the butt” syndrome. When he decides something needs to be done around the house, it has to be done immediately. This isn’t bad when it’s something he can accomplish by himself, but it’s annoying when he has to involve me.