Place for Everyone

Parents Forum
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<p>Hi there everyone!</p>

<p>I’ve been lurking about for a while and suddenly thought of a post that might be somewhat useful. Last night I was reading the various threads about schools for B students and then this morning had a long discussion with my mum about fit, college, and how there are so many wonderful options out there. Then this got me thinking about a few of my friends their stories. </p>

<p>Last year I mentioned a good friend of mine who applied to a lot of dream schools (UChicago, Cal, Stanford, Harvard, Columbia, etc) and had really good grades/scores/ecs. He only had one safety (a state school) and never thought he’d have to go there, his theory being that if he applied to enough places someone was sure to let him in. Lo and behold, come April he got hammered with rejections. Around this time he stopped talking to me all together and I learned that he was incredibly depressed. He was miserable, especially as all those around him were getting at least a few great acceptances. However, he kept his chin up and started at the state school. I’ve only talked to him once or twice, but he absolutely loves it there. He’s constantly doing awesome things with friends and loves his classes. He’s said again and again that he’s happier than he’s ever been and loves his school. In short, he made a complete turn around from where he was last year. </p>

<p>I had another friend who was a struggling student. Her SAT scores were low, her grades were dotted with C’s and below. Her dream school was one specific state school. She recieved an acceptance letter, was thrilled. Two days later she recieved a letter from the university that told her the acceptance letter she recieved was an error, an appology, and a note saying she was really waitlisted and in reality was so far down the waitlist that she wouldn’t be able to get off most likely. So, after one heartbreaking week, she decided not to accept her place on the waitlist and decided to attend a different state school. Now she’s happy and loves her classes and major. She told me she never wonders what life at the school that waitlisted would have been like and that she’s very happy at her school. </p>

<p>I guess my point in posting this is to give a bit of testimony to the “bounce back” ability of kids. Although I hope none of your sons and daughters have to go through what my two friends did, even the worst outcomes come April can lead to happiness and success come September!</p>

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<p>Thank you so much for relating the stories of your friends, whitneylm! Indeed, your friends are no longer kids, they are amazing resilient adults!</p>

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<p>I love to read stuff like this. Things that don’t go as planned can turn out wonderfully well.</p>

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<p>My view on life is that everything happens for a reason and you may not know why something happened until everything related to that is all set and done (Sorry if I confuse some of you :))
Those stories fit perfectly with it…</p>

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<p>Thanks for posting Whitney!</p>

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<p>Those are wonderful stories. Thanks for posting! They will give hope to many students and parents.</p>

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<p>Whitney, Great stories. It really is so nice to see you again. Now that you’ve been through the process yourself, are there any particular questions or things to look for that you’d advise current seniors to consider when making their final choice?</p>

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<p>I love “turning out for the best” stories! Good post.</p>

<p>-I’m a student.</p>

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<p>I was deferred ED from my first choice school. I had always thought that I would go there, and I was a legacy. Come April I got my rejection letter, and I was pretty upset. But now I’m extremely happy (and was for all of my first year too) at W&M and wouldn’t change a thing. Well, that’s not completely true, but no where is perfect. I think I’m as happy as I would be anywhere though. (The other school is 2 hours west on I-64, if you were wondering =P)</p>

<p>This is a good topic, most people who don’t end up at their first choice enjoy where they end up. =]</p>

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<p>I’m glad people liked the stories. :slight_smile: </p>

<p>Carolyn~</p>

<p>I think my biggest advice will be to listen to both heart and head when approaching the college decision. I know sometimes it feels like the world is full of financial aid that meets someone’s idea of your EFC but feels as though its impossible and that your life is dotted with people going to better schools and people who keep pushing certain name brands, but college really is an individual choice. It takes heart to realize which school really is right. At the same time, you can’t forget that four years (with all luck) from now, you’ll be out in the real world. So, you can’t forget the role your head plays. </p>

<p>If there’s a school you’ve always wanted to apply to, do it. Even though I love Reed, I can’t help but sometimes wonder “what if”. There are a lot of schools I was interested in. I still read their CC boards sometimes. I thought I wouldn’t get in, I thought there was no point in even trying. But, there was. I just realized it too late. However, I’m lucky. I didn’t realize everything too late. I applied to Reed at the very last minute, I realized there was no where else on my list I wanted to be at the last second. And I applied. And I got in. And, even though it was twice as expensive as most of my other offers, we made it work somehow. Sometimes I still can’t believe I’m actually at Reed. </p>

<p>Now, finally, this brings me to another point. The “grass is greener” virus. You may feel it at some point. I felt it a lot (you can still hear some of it in the paragraph above). I especially felt it a few monthes from now. When you get your acceptances, they feel amazing. You’re excited. On top of the world even (I can still remember the exact moment when I got my Linfield acceptance… more so… I remember my exact thoughts when I realized that weird e-mail Reed sent me was an acceptance…). Then you go to school. Suddenly the person who sits next to you is going to Stanford, that girl who always annoyed you just got into Yale. There comes a point when the best thing you can do for yourself is shut out that little voice that creeps in and congratulate yourself for getting into college. </p>

<p>Visiting is really important. I can’t stress this enough. On paper, Linfield seemed perfect. After visiting, I realized I could not see myself there. No matter how attractive their aid was, it just wasn’t a good match. On the other hand, when I visited Reed I was really sick. I was only there for less than four hours. And I still left knowing it was the right place to be. </p>

<p>And, finally, if you suddenly feel like you have got to apply to a school, don’t dismiss it. I kid you not when I say I applied to Reed at the last moment. I mean, you don’t want to go adding in ten schools because of nerves, but you don’t want to overlook what might be a perfect match because you don’t want to fill out another app. </p>

<p>And, yes I lied with the finally above, one last thing. Enjoy your senior year. Enjoy spending time with your family, your friends, and in your home place. Its hard sometimes, especially with all your energy going into what next year is going to look like for you, but there’s suddenly this moment when you look back and realize high school’s over. When you realize this one point in your life is over forever and you don’t want to only have memories of anguish over SATs and worry over spelling something wrong in the app to your first choice school.</p>