Finally had “the talk” (haha) with my SIL on Friday. We usually (my family, her family, my mom) go to her house. That would make likely 10-12 of us. She asked what we were thinking. I said I think we would have to stay home. Those of us working need to continue doing that and most don’t have the option of quarantining for days before. 10-12 would be pushing and beyond any recommended group size. My H honestly would likely not go - and so with that, how could I go and then come home?!
My mom on the one hand says we shouldn’t get together - then on the other hand will say “well SIL’s house is big!” - I said big doesn’t matter and defeats the purpose if we all have to be inside and be sequestered in different rooms! A hallmark of our holidays is playing some games like CatchPhrase - that won’t happen!
I suggested Zoom over pie and maybe we can figure out a Zoom game to play. I felt better having “the talk” but still remain uncertain of what will happen with my mom. I think she may still go to their house. (she sees bro/SIL on and off for short periods already as they/we have to drive her most places). We are out of town about an hour away so I guess if she does anything it’s their house.
Does it feel 100% good and settled? No. But I’m glad to have it aired out.
My household is large and I can have a very pleasant Thanksgiving Day with just the people I live with. So for myself, the restrictions are not terrible and I can wait for next year or the next to resume the massive, festive gatherings. The problem is, every year I host members of my family who live alone. I feel so so guilty planning even a low-key dinner celebration with my husband and kids, knowing that I am leaving out loved ones who have nowhere else to go because they don’t have pods of their own. It makes me want to skip Thanksgiving altogether - although I know that ignoring the holiday with my immediate family isn’t helping my relatives at all.
I really hate this.
@Aida can you offer to deliver a meal to those who are alone?
I’m happy! I got my 12 pound turkey today. It’s frozen and is in our freezer. I honestly worried that with so many smaller families having their own thanksgiving, getting a smaller turkey would be a problem. Also got the stuffing and cranberry sauce. Everything else will come from our CSA the weekend before Thanksgiving.
Just cooking for two…need to cut down those recipes!!
Now that we have talked it over with everyone, it is all agreed that no one is traveling for Thanksgiving. It is still somewhat possible that my daughter would come home for Christmas but that would depend on getting extremely unlikely good news about virus numbers. I’m OK with it all. Relieved to have the decision made. Trying to focus now on what to do instead, like some kind of game instead of hanging out and doing puzzles and just being around each other? (Not as concerned about replacing the family feast.) I feel like making more of an effort with personalized or handmade presents. Not sure what.
I got a cornish hen for my mother and I. If I take the picture at a right angle, I bet you I could make it look like a big turkey.
I am seeing my mom for Thanksgiving and then seeing my kids on Saturday. A bit of moving around, but it will be worth it.
Just found out my in laws & aunt, all in their 90’s, will be having Thanksgiving dinner together with SIL, BIL, nephew & H’s cousin. In a hotel restaurant. Covid seems to be no big deal for them. They cannot understand why we aren’t getting together with relatives. We aren’t even having dinner with our pregnant D. I don’t care. We feel it’s better to be safe than sorry. Every week during our online church service, we hear about more people who thought they were being careful who ended up with Covid.
Need something creative, potentially not interfering with S and DIL going to her parents. Pie zoom? Soup zoom? H wants it on Thanksgiving. Should we all just start day drinking?
Now my brother’s wife is posting on FB about how we don’t know if this is the last holiday we’ll spend with our loved ones , so don’t live in fear. I am surrounded by people who don’t get it. Although this SIL is pretty much a kook, so I shouldn’t be surprised. I will try to keep my blinders on and go about my life.
Hang in there, @kelsmom . You are doing the right thing, especially with your D being pregnant. We are seeing ours, only because we are in a very closed bubble with her. But not going to take any chance of her getting ill that we can possibly avoid. I don’t live in fear, I live in hope.
One of the California ‘rules’ for Thanksgiving is that meals must be outside with no visitors going inside except for the bathroom. This may be doable for those of us with large patios in single family homes. Not so much for apartment or condo dwellers. Of course, it can’t and won’t be enforced.
I have a feeling no matter the COVID situation after January 1 that there are going to be some big signs of relief that the holidays (decisions) are over.
Article on today’s paper basically saying that not immediate family gatherings should be avoided this Thanksgiving and Christmas. It’s just “not the time” for these is what it said.
We will enjoy our smaller turkey (freezing leftovers). For Christmas, I’ll grill a beef tenderloin. It will be great.
I’ve decided I can’t stress about it and I’m letting go. Our family pod of three will be together and may be joined by DS + GF. DH is scheduled for spinal surgery 11/18 and should come home 11/22. Not sure how he’ll be or how much care he’ll require so I’m ordering almost the entire dinner from a local catering company. DD says it will feel like Thanksgiving as long as I make my traditional sage stuffing - SOLD! We’ll have leftovers for days and I can make day-after turkey soup. I’m looking forward to the simplicity!
With 2 kids and their families in NY and us in CA, we’ve decided not to spend Thanksgiving with them, first time ever without kids. We will contemplate however flying to NY for Christmas because my daughter and her family cannot go to Canada to be with her in-laws this year. Since this is my son’s turn to spend Christmas with us, we may all be together on Christmas Day for the first time in 6 years. We will do the Covid test before and after landing in NY per state law.
Haven’t thought of our Thanksgiving dinner menu for 2 yet.
This is the first year ever to not be with family in 33 years. Sigh! I’d like to Zoom (if it doesn’t crash). But I’d also like to have an activity planned. I have not cared for Zoom sessions when we all sit around and talk. It doesn’t have the same flow as an in-person gathering, so feels awkward.
Any suggestions for an activity? For anyone playing a family game, which have you found work well over a Zoom type session?
We’re going forward with Thanksgiving. Many family members have had Covid. Some haven’t and some would rather take the risk. I’m very worried but also can’t see not living life for another year. Adults all work from home and have almost no store contact. The biggest risks are my kids ( tested frequently at boarding school) No one is flying. No one is coming if they feel sick.
There’s a big chance one state or another will have set quarantines preventing travel. There’s a good chance we’ll also have a limit on the sheet numbers.
I envy those who have the option of having things outside. We’d do that for sure if it was possible.
They are really starting to push the idea that everyone should spend the holiday with only family living in the same home. No small groups of 10 (unless they all live in your home), even if allowed by law.
The governor said this in his press conference today. Several local doctors are doing PSAs for this. I think the idea will catch on.
