<p>Hello All! </p>
<p>I am a International student, from Singapore, and I would like to apply to uChicago. I have my essay for joke prompt:</p>
<p>My life have many struggles, because I am born in Asia Southeast in the city-state of Singapore founded in 1819 by sang Nila Utama. My life I have to work very hard, and my mother and father both work two/three job to have me to sent to school and to learn English. However, I have always said that looking at the light sides of life will help, so recently I learn of Shibe Doge. </p>
<p>Shibe Doge is a funny jokes made by American friends, on famous websites like reedit and other memes. Shibe Doge is a picture with many English words, like “wow” and “omg” because “omg” means oh my god, and it is funny and humorous because it is a picture of a cute dog. They mis-spell the word “dog” by “doge” to make more jokes. </p>
<p>I am very interested in Chicago University, and would like to go there for my parents struggle and for my life outlook which enjoys jokes very much. I hope I have done satisfactory in explaining Shibe Doge joke, if you need more information I am very happy to give you personal landline or e-mail addresses. Thank you!</p>
<p>Is this really supposed to be your Chicago essay? I read your other post and either you are making jokes with your posts or you don’t have any idea how to write a college essay or a proper SAT essay either. I don’t know to take you seriously, I suppose I am replying to a ■■■■■ post.</p>
<p>If not, then you should know that you can’t submit essays with numerous grammatical errors. I know English is not your first language but you should be able to write an essay in correct English if you mean to study at a U.S. university.</p>
<p>The content here has too many problems to go into. You need someone to help you, if you really have the qualifications for Chicago, one has to wonder. Do you have resources like a teacher or someone that can read this and give you feedback? You didn’t do a good job of talking about the meme or why it is funny. But that’s not the only job of the essay. You kind of sound like a small child. You need to put some work in and not just write anything.</p>
<p>You should never put this kind of thing into the essay: I hope I have done satisfactory in explaining Shibe Doge joke, if you need more information I am very happy to give you personal landline or e-mail addresses. Thank you! </p>
<p>That is like writing a letter, not an essay.</p>
<p>Also in future, don’t post your essays online, read the warning pinned at the top of the page.</p>
<p>Here are some essays that students who applied to Chicago posted, in case you are interested. Noe that no one posted a current essay online, these are from past years:</p>
<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/university-chicago/164537-post-your-essay.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/university-chicago/164537-post-your-essay.html</a></p>
<p>I am told that for prestigious private colleges in the United States, it is a positive factor for you to be international and a Minority. Is this true?</p>
<p>Hi Lacrosse38,
I would definitely suggest having somebody proof read that for you to help edit it. Also, you should probably extend your essay, I might recommend writing and essay on another prompt and compare it. Go for about 500 words.</p>
<p>Also, depending on the school, being an international student does not always make a positive difference. It can even make it harder sometimes.</p>
<p>Lacrosse38, many schools like to have international students from different countries and background for diversity in their school. For prestigious colleges, like University of Chicago, the competition is very fierce and they are looking for top student who can demonstrate that they can do the work required in a challenging academic environment. They will have many qualified students applying and not room for all of them. So while they may like an international minority student, being one is not sufficient.</p>
<p>I’m can’t see that you will be considered qualified on the basis of this essay. It is not a strong essay making insightful observations. The first paragraph has nothing to do with the second paragraph. It contains grammatical errors as well. Those can be edited and fixed, but you have basic content problems.</p>
<p>I think, from reading this and your other essay posted, that you do not have a good understanding of how to write an essay and develop thoughts.</p>
<p>OKAY mr. BrownParent, you too do not have coherant thoughts… “I’m can’t see that you will be considered qualified”
This is incorrect grammar based on oxford dictionary and English grammar rules, maybe you mean “I can’t see”??</p>
<p>That was one error, most likely a typo. Yours had about 15 errors!</p>
<p>Look, I am here for CONSTRUCTIVE criticism and not hateful speech, can a moderator please clean up these comments Thanks.</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Your joke explanation is completely incoherent.</p></li>
<li><p>Are you trying to convince the reader that your life was full of hardship because you were born in Singapore? Also, remember that your prompt is about jokes. Are you trying to throw a sob story into the mix? That won’t work out well for you.</p></li>
<li><p>Your essay is far too expository in style. Read some short stories and get in the habit of narrating your content more. </p></li>
<li><p>I laughed at the part about you giving your landline/email. Did you intend for that to be funny? If so, I kind of get your sense of style. It’s corny/dorky and takes some time to get used to. Use that style all throughout your essay and it could work.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>Thanks you, I try to be funny!</p>