<p>So…this is my essay…I am practicing so that I can get a 2360+ on the SAT…so I need to know what this essay would receive. If it is not perfect (it obviously isn’t, as no essay is “perfect”), please provide me with suggestions on how I can raise my essay score to a 12! Thanks for your dedication!</p>
<p>Well, here it is:</p>
<h1>NOTE: I made up my 3rd example (but the SAT graders don’t know that 
)</h1>
<p>Is money the most significant factor in determining the quality of one’s life? Societal occurrences and the lives of well-known figures delineate that this is not the case. This concept that money is not the most significant part of one’s life is illuminated by the lives of Martin Luther King Jr., Sydney Carton from “A Tale of Two Cities”, and Dave Burnett, a lottery winner.</p>
<p>First of all, as evidenced by MLK Jr’s life, the quality of one’s experiences is, in no way, directly correlated to the presence of money. Sure, money could make some aspects of life slightly better, but it did not alter MLK’s life, whatsoever. Martin Luther King devoted his whole life to fighting the racial injustices that were prevalent in his society in Birmingham, Alabama. He was an impoverished man for the majority of his lifetime; however, he remained tenacious, keeping himself steadfast to his idea that racial discrimination should be abolished. Because he failed to let his financial instability deter him from his motives and goals, it is clear that money is not the most significant factor in determining the quality of one’s life; King ultimately fulfilled his goals, so he lived the happiest life possible in the absence of money.</p>
<p>Furthermore, this notion is demonstrated by Sydney Carton, a primary personage in Charles Dickens’s “A Tale of Two Cities”. In this novel, Charles Darnay, a poor, yet elegant man, competes with Sydney Carton, a wealthy, but awkward man, to win over Lucie Manette in marriage. They both make innumerable efforts. Sydney Carton attempts to win over Lucie by buying her extremely expensive items and planning expensive events. On the other hand, Charles Darnay simply professes his undying affection, love, and admiration for Lucie. Ultimately, Lucie Manette becomes engaged to Charles, as she valued his true, heartfelt love over Sydney’s extravagant, yet superficial, displays of his wealth in order to win her over. This clearly illuminates how money is not an important factor in determining the quality of one’s life, since despite the fact that Sydney was quite wealthy, his life was still miserable as he lacked other significant factors, such as true compassion for Lucie, and was therefore not chosen to marry Lucie Manette.</p>
<p>Finally, the modern-day occurrence of lotteries demonstrates how the presence of money is not only insignificant, but can also lead to worse outcomes than originally intended. Dave Burnett, the 2005 Mega-Millions lottery winner was awarded 250 million dollars. Incontestably, he was overjoyed. Following his, he decided to spend his money on buying anew car and a new house. Unfortunately, he made many irrational decisions, such as gambling away his house and making unpayable loans to the bank. Consequently, within just four months of being a multi-millionaire, he was begging for money on the streets with his family (he took them down, too), homeless. His illogical actions, which directly resulted from the prominence of money in his life, significantly worsened the quality of his life and that of those around him. This goes to show that not only is money not the most significant factor in one’s life, but also it can ruin lives when used irresponsibly.</p>
<p>In conclusion, money is far off from being the most vital aspect in determining the quality or type of life one lives. People, such as Martin Luther King Junior, led amazing lives without much money. Conversely, those like Sydney Carton and Dave Burnett, despite having an exuberant amount of money, led quite dismal and unfulfilling lives. If more people would keep more optimistically hedonistic goals in life, where they would desire to live purely to reach a state of general happiness and content, then the world could be a better, more stable place.</p>
<p>Thanks! Also, I tend to have to write very small in my essays because as you can see above, I have a lot to write…how can I shorten them? Also, to get a 12, what exactly do I need to do? Is it more in the explanation of my examples (which I have a lot of) or what? Please tell me specifically based on the above essay I have composed. Thanks, once again, for your efforts!</p>
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