<p>hi!!! can you please spare the time to give some criticism on my essay, tips, and grade:) - i really need to know what i need to improve on ! thanks!!!</p>
<p>PLEASE POST YOUR OWN ESSAYS ON THIS THREAD IF YOU NEED OPINIONS </p>
<p>Prompt: Do you think that ease does not challenge us and that we need adversity to help us discover who we are?</p>
<pre><code>Going through tough challenges and obstacles helps to define a person’s personal quality. Whether it may be genetic disorders, physical, or emotional challenges, these courses help to shape and discover ourselves. Several real life instances clearly show that adversity always prevails.
As shown by Sam Berns, a seventeen year old with a genetic disorder called progeria, having the disease not only helped to discover who he was, but also made him happier as a person. Weighing only fifty pounds, life was not easy for Sam as he also had mild strokes and heart attacks due do his internal incapability to function as a “normal person. One time in high school, he eagerly wanted to play the snare drum as it was his favorite instrument and included marching. Because the drum was almost as heavy as Sam, he was told that he couldn’t play. He felt devastated, but he did not let it stop him because he and his family built one that weighted only six pounds. During the half time show, he marched forward, feeling a sense of happiness. Thus, because Sam faced a difficult obstacle, he discovered after he overcame it that the most important part of life was to be happy.
As shown by the actions of David Belgin, working hard in order to achieve a world record helped David to know his own personal traits. David could to hold his breath for a long time when he first started – around ten minutes. After realizing that the world record holder was sixteen minutes, he became determine to beat it. He tried many experiments, and the doctors tried to imply that it was impossible. Each day he would do breathing lessons for four hours, until his final debut. When he beat the world record on the Oprah talk show with millions watching, he noticed that he only accomplished his dream because he was a determined person. Hence, David achieving the world record helped him to discover his determination because of his constant practicing, and his clear mindset of “never giving up”.
After careful analysis of Sam Berns and David Belgin, adversity indeed plays a key role in discovering ones characteristics. Going pass tough obstacles not only helps people to achieve their dreams, but also helps them to realize the traits that made them pass the adversity. If David never had the aspiration to achieve the world record, he wouldn’t have discovered his drive and determination.
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<p>THANK YOU!!! 
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