Please grade my practice SAT essay?

<p>*Please give my essay a score from 1-6. Constructive criticism would be very helpful to me. Thanks!!</p>

<p>Lies are usually attempts to make everything simpler-for the liar-than it ought to be. We have a primary obligation not to undermine each others' reality for the sake of expediency.</p>

<p>adapted from Adrienne Rich</p>

<p>Assignment: Is honesty always the best policy?</p>

<pre><code> Honesty is valued in our society. However it is not always the best policy because the truth can sometimes hurt ourselves and others. This point can be illustrated through the examples of Carol Hathaway, an ER nurse in the TV series "Emergency Room", and my grandma.

<p>Carol Hathaway is a very honest and righteous person in the TV series "Emergency Room". However, one day, she accidentally transfused the wrong blood to a patient, causing him to go into cardiac arrest and die on table. Although the hospital administration kept convincing Carol that it wasn't her fault, Carol still decides to be honest and write her mistake up in a report. But disaster followed after that. her accident got leaked to a local newspaper and soon the whole county knew about her mistake. Carol was suspended from her job because of that. This example shows that honesty isn't always the best policy. Carol's honesty only hurt herself.</p>

<p>My grandma is another example that illustrates this fact. First of all, my grandma used to be a healthy and happy person. Everyday, she'd take me to go exercise and play games, such as hide-n-seek with me. But then my aunt was diagnosed with cancer. My other aunt was honest and told my grandma about it. After that my grandma went into a severe depression. She wouldn't eat, wouldn't speak, and just locked herself in the house. She never recovered. Today, she still wouldn't talk to people, including me. I'd say the grief about my aunt's cancer ate away a great part of who she was. My other aunt's honesty didn't help. It hurt my grandma. This shows that honesty isn't always the best policy.</p>

<p>In conclusion, honesty is not always the best policy because the truth can sometimes hurt ourselves and others. This holds true for Carol Hathaway in the TV series "Emergency Room" and my grandma. Although people often assert that being honest is highly important, we must sometimes exercise caution with honesty because it may have unexpected consequences.</p>

<p>10/12 atleast... that was long</p>

<p>Illogical comparison. Why are you comparing your grandma to a TV star? Your examples should be consistent, not something like Hitler and your great-aunt Marie. Also, your first paragraph is too short and lacks detail, merely repeating the topic question. Vary it a little.</p>


<p>9 seems a bit low. Maybe with a better intro, a 10.</p>