<p>Wrong. Two chose to participate in an act in which a well known side effect can be a baby. Both parties know that only one party is entitled to make the decision of what will happen should a baby be conceived. The time to exercise the right to choose for a male is pre-conception. Unless you are arguing that the fact that sex makes babies was unknown to the male involved. </p>
<p>As for fairness…one party must either have a baby, miscarriage or abortion plus provide materially for the baby should they chose to carry to term. The other party must only provide materially. That is unfair. But it’s not unfair towards the male.</p>
<p>My Catholic school used to suspend girls who got pregnant (naturally girls who had abortions were just fine) and the boys got to continue to attend school.</p>
<p>I really hoped that was a dying trend 25 years ago.</p>
<p>My kids don’t attend the school at issue & I don’t really know their policies. It seems wrong for one parent to be kicked out if the other isn’t as well, but I really don’t KNOW what was done and whether the parent(s) are able to return after the baby is born. Private schools do not have to follow the same rules as public schools. Our public schools do have a few options for young teen parents, including on-line school, alternative schools and I’m not sure about HSs as well.</p>
<p>Didn’t know any unwed parents back in the stone ages when I attended HS.</p>
<p>My son’s friend’s sister got pregnant at 16 and the father (who was 19) was in prison 6 months later. Parents decided to help the girl raise her daughter. The girl was a great mom for about 4 months and then decided she was missing out on too much. Grandparents have now adopted the baby but I feel as if they resent being “forced into this situation”. In my opinion they asked for it, from letting the boyfriend move in before the pregnancy (“but they slept in separate room!”- lol, obviously not!) to letting their daughter call the shots. Daughter is now living with another real low-life and they are stuck raising a baby. Weird thing is that the one who is my son’s age is now going down the same road and they just don’t seem to see it. They are such nice people, but totally dense when it comes to their daughters- so sad!</p>
<p>We have friends whose D also went down this road. They feel compelled to raise their grandchild, but it is not the joyous time they had hoped it would be. Their D is pretty lost and they don’t know her friends but she has consistently made poor choices and continues to do so. Her older brother is graduating from Pomona and should be having a pretty good future in his math/science fields. They pray for D but as far as I’ve heard, things remain pretty grim for her. The grandchild is difficult and the grandparents are tired and not sure how their resources will stretch for all of them going forward, as neither the D nor whomever the father is contribute toward the child. :(</p>
<p>younghoss- When “2 choose to have sex” (apparently unprotected), they BOTH have chosen to conceive a baby. If the young man did not want to risk any chance of producing offspring, well, he had the choice to keep zipped.</p>
<p>That the father of the baby was allowed to continue at the prep school while the mother was expelled is indeed a double standard.</p>
<p>(cross-posted with pugmadkate–I think i missed the last page.)</p>
<p>I don’t like the idea of girls being kicked out of school for getting pregnant…it just encourages abortion…how is that better?</p>
<p>My kids’ Catholic school has in their handbook that girls will not be suspended or expelled for being pregnant. </p>
<p>My own Catholic high school (in the 70s) did NOT kick out pregnant girls. They specifically said that having a policy of kicking girls out would only encourage abortions. </p>
<p>I am appalled that any school would kick out a pregnant girl or tell her that she can’t return after the birth. Ugh!</p>
<p>well, sort of, Fauve. If 2 choose to have sex, they both have the risk of her pregnancy. That isn’t the same as choosing to conceive. Choosing to conceive is a deliberate attempt at pregnancy, and the OP did not indicate the boy had that intent. In fact, it appears the girl attempted to trick the boy. Yes he could have chosen to “keep it zipped”, but they didn’t. They both chose sex. But she alone has the right to choose what to do now. If she had chosen abortion he could not have stopped her.
Regardless of a pregnancy by choice or not, only the female has the right to choose giving birth. That is a double standard that I don’t know the cure for.</p>
<p>And I see the other double standard now- a father-to-be can stay in school, but a mother-to-be can’t. I guess it is much like pregnancy leave from a job. The mother-to-be has certain rights and protections that a father-to-be doesn’t have. Double standards are everywhere!</p>
<p>The HS ( a state math/science ) my daughter went to would absolutely have kicked out any girl that got pregnant. They were total control freaks. Almost makes me wish she had so we didn’t have to deal with some of those extraordinarily obnoxious people for 2 years. Still makes e shudder.</p>
Surely they made poor decisions, but I wouldn’t call the baby a very big victim. I, personally, like existing, and the person created will likely be glad of it in the future, despite the circumstances (different circumstances, different day, it would be a different baby).</p>
<p>I don’t think they’ll be too bad off. If the girl was at a prep school, I would assume that either her parents are well-off, or she’s quite smart (but clearly not yet wise).</p>
<p>
Ridiculous. A school that wants to condemn abortions should not penalize girls who choose not to have them. Obviously the father should also be accountable, but the school can’t order a genetic test, so a denial would be difficult to disprove.</p>
<p>Back in the stone ages, I know of a Catholic girls’ school that did allow the young mother to return after the birth, but advised the girl’s parents to defer marriage until after graduation. There was a statute at that school that they could not graduate any married young women; parenthood was not specified.</p>
<p>I agree that it was pretty heavy-handed to kick the young mom out, but perhaps they have determined that this serves as a deterrent to other young women who might have similar ideas or feel that it would damage their reputation with the parents of their other students. I’m still surprised when I hear about the growing numbers of teen-aged girls who actually try to get pregnant. It certainly shows an extreme lack of maturity and foresight on their part and I hope they have parental help for the child’s sake!</p>