<p>Last night I started reading all about visiting my son when he is sent to prison-It sounds grueling!! My stomach, which had been good lately,became very irritated again, and continues this AM. What happens when he goes to sentencing? Is he handcuffed and let away, or can he walk on his own, as he has been out on bail? How long does it take to be sent to Processing? How long until he is actually placed in his prison? I am posting here because I feel more of a connection on CC, and I know some of you are in NEW JERSEY, and will know about CRAF, and what the minimum security prisons are like.</p>
<p>It might be helpful , rather than to start another thread, to post in the thread(s) you have already started about this unfortunate situation, as with the number of readers and post responses you’ve gotten, it might be seen by more posters. Just a thought.
already
Best of luck with a difficult situation.</p>
<p>No, I wanted this to be very visible to all readers, but I appreciate your thought Jym. I need information to build up my comfort level with what I NEED TO BE READY FOR.</p>
<p>Fauxmaven - I have a lot of sympathy for your unfortunate situation, but you are asking a lot of specific prison procedural questions - something that I doubt that very many people of CC have had any experience with. Perhaps there are prison-related websites out there where you could find better information or more people able to offer relevant advice.</p>
<p>I’d ask this in the prison talk forum’s federal section, but I think it can take a week for a non-violent, non-threat, non-special custody person like your son. I understand they have a lot of paper to process given that everything must be scored and graded. I also believe they won’t tell you how long it will be, maybe out of some idea of preventing jail breaks but also perhaps because this is prison and they’re in charge. </p>
<p>It occurred to me that you might want to read a few memoirs. The one that really popped into mind is Jeff Henderson’s. He’s a well known chef, now a TV personality, who spent 10 years in the federal prison system for drug dealing. (And Tim Allen is another but I don’t know if he has a book about it.) Jeff’s book is particularly interesting because he describes how he got into cooking in prison and even how he traveled alone by plane when he was transferred from prison to prison.</p>
<p>Procedures vary greatly from facility to facility even within the same jurisdiction. Your son’s attorney may be familiar with the practices of the relevant institution if he has worked with other families facing the same sort of conviction. Be aware that sometimes attorneys get greater access to inmates than family members do. In the case of my last detained client (a federal detainee being held in a county facility within the state system), I was permitted to talk to her through glass, while her family had to use closed-circuit TV.</p>
<p>I think Hanna has the right idea - have your son’s attorney tell you about these procedural questions. He/she should know.</p>
<p>As every state and every situation is different, I’m not sure how much we can help you. That said, the book “Orange Is the New Black” was very interesting and a good read.</p>
<p>I was on Prison Talk, but I felt the people there seemed poorly educated and I could not find answers I was seeking.</p>
<p>Hang in here fauxmaven.</p>
<p>CC People may be surprised how many CC participants have had some dealing with prison.</p>
<p>That said, I think this sentence is going to be much harder on you than it is your son. He will quickly get into a routine and be comfortable with it.</p>
<p>You, on the otherhand, have your imagination and not much else at this time. I’m sure you can, are and will be imagining things much worse than they will be for your son.</p>
<p>So hang in here and let us see how much feedback you might get.</p>
<p>They probably know what they need to know for THEIR situation, though. I work for a church and we sometimes have to help members navigate the court system (we also allow people to do community service hours here and have court contact that way too). We’ve dealt with the county courthouse, which has one set of processes and visiting regulations that vary by type of prisoner. There’s also the county’s regional justice center, which has another set of regulations and processes. Then, there’s the CITY jail and court system and the STATE system, which are different yet again. And that’s just in the same state! So, what YOU need to know is unlikely to be the same as anyone else HERE unless they have someone in the SAME court and prison locations.</p>
<p>What you need to do is go on the website for the court you are dealing with and find the FAQ for families. That might answer your questions. Once you have the location of where your son will be going, look up THAT website and the FAQ. There are also national companies that allow you to deposit money for the prison store and phone card money. These ALSO vary by location. Again, you will find this information on the websites, but I’ve also found that the people at the prisons or courts are very helpful when you call. They know families are stressed and confused and do try to help.</p>
<p>We often deal with people whose first language is not English, so we need to be very clear on what the families need to know. We’ve been happy to find these facilities are pretty helpful. </p>
<p>I’m sorry you’re so stressed and having to deal with this. But I don’t think CC is really a place you’ll find the concrete answers you need.</p>
<p>I just posted my introduction on Prison Talk-thanks for any advice-goodbye-fauxmaven</p>
<p>fauxmaven,.
My good friend’s husband works at a federal prison. I can ask him and will post if he has anything helpful. Generally my understanding is that they are given a date to turn themselves in. As far as how long it is between sentencing and that date I do not know.
Best of luck to you in this difficult situation. We all love our children and I can imagine how tough this is on you.</p>
<p>This is a third thread I am seeing on this topic. Even though this is www, we may not be as anonymous as we think. I would just be careful what you are posting, especially on a forum where people may not always have best of intention. You may attract uncalled for attention. </p>
<p>This is a very difficult situation for your family, but maybe it is best to deal with it in private.</p>
<p>Having had a coulee for friends with family members who went to jail or prison, I understand the stress and fear. you have a few months to figure all this out. Beaty. Slow down. Catch your breath. </p>
<p>You will figure out all the specifics as time gets closer, so for now, just breath. You are going to make yourself nuts by obsessing.</p>
<p>He should be allowed to go home with a date to start his sentence. Those considered a danger or flight risk are brought right to jail. He will likely spend some time in the county before he goes to CRAF. It depends on how crowded CRAF is. As to how long he will be at CRAF, at least a week, but, again, could be longer if his home prison has no room for him. I would anticipate 2 weeks. They will not allow him to call you until he is processed and his contact list is checked. That can take some time for a first time offender. The guys that are in and out just update their lists so they get phone calls sooner.
As far as visiting, it is very intimidating for a visitor, it’s meant to be that way. Although you may be an upstanding citizen, may who visit are not and they treat everyone very suspiciously. Once you know where he is being sent, you can go on that prison’s website and it will explain visiting and how to send money and stuff like that.</p>
<p>I can’t answer your specific questions, but I’m posting the about 10 year old experience of a friend. My friend fell in love with someone who had to go to prison. He was a pacifist and broke the law in the way he protested. The first few times, he got probation or community service, but he kept it up and got sentenced to prison. I don’t know if this stuff is still true, but you can check. </p>
<p>Reading material. As I understand it, anything has to be screened by the prison. However, there are certain companies that are considered “safe.” Lots of prisoners subscribe to magazines through them. The person paying for the subscription never touches the magazine or newspaper. Since the company mails or delivers–I’m not sure how it works–hundreds of items to a prison each week, they are all pre-screened. The company is trusted because if anything gets through, they will no longer get special treatment and because they go through a background check of some sort. My understanding is that stuff ordered through the “safe,” pre-screened companies gets through quickly, whereas any other reading material sits around forever waiting for the prison staff to check it to make sure it doesn’t violate any rules. There is a lot of hanging around time in a prison so there is time to read. The libraries are often fairly well stocked but current newspapers and magazines are in short supply. It apparently takes a while for the subscription to be processed. So, try to find out if this sort of thing exists in New Jersey, and order some newspaper/magazines as soon as your son finds out where he is being sent. </p>
<p>Phones. My friend thought this was a giant scam. The prisoners have to call collect. As I understand it, at least back then, only certain carriers serve the prisons and you get billed at rates that are beyond belief. My recollection is that there is some way to get a slightly lower rate by pre-paying or having a special calling card. Ask. </p>
<p>Ear plugs. My friend’s boyfriend had a lot of trouble sleeping because it was never really quiet at night. Find out if earplugs are allowed and if so, buy a stock of them. It helps to try them out to see if they work --there are different types. So, check that out now. </p>
<p>I’ve said before that if your son is the least bit religious, he should get involved with the chaplain. When you find out where your son is going, find out who the chaplain is. Contact him and ask what you should know. I think that if you call any chaplain at the sort of prison your son will be going to in the same state , he or she will be willing to give you some guidance. Many of them have worked in the same prison for years and they know how things work. </p>
<p>Hang in there.</p>
<p>Newspapers are not allowed; they don’t want gang members to be able to read about other gang members getting killed or arrested as it may start gang wars in the prison. Ear plugs can be molded to jam locks, so again, not allowed.
As far as phones, if you have a land line phone that can accept collect calls, you are good to go. They are not allowed to call cell phones except for one provider, I believe, tha I have never heard of.
Putting money on his account will allow him to buy things while he is there, things like snacks and approved books and stuff. Anything you send will be rifled through and may be confiscated, don’t send food or books, they never get through. Your letters will be read by the guards to ensure there are not gang messages in them.</p>
<p>There are several sites that are specifically for people,to send necessities to prisoners. Your prisonmsystme should have a list or the sites themselves will say who accepts their boxes. Using these sites will give you a much better chance of getting items through. </p>
<p>While some of these posts are scary, dont give up hope of helping son.</p>
<p>I don’t know where he will be placed, and that’s my problem. PS-I posted on Prisontalk a couple of days ago, and have had no response.</p>