<p>Not to scare anyone here, but we just received a letter that informs us that the guy that we hired to manage our properties has just dropped dead in his sleep. When I last saw him, he was not fat, nor obese and not old either, maybe 65 max. So yes it is your life, do what you want.</p>
<p>MarkPhotog: Well, when you post personal information about yourself on an anonymous internet board, people will feel they have the right to comment and respond. You’ve basically given them that right when you post personal stuff. I didn’t read this whole thread or your earlier post, just answering your question-- though I know you didn’t ask me, but there you have it.</p>
<p>On another note, that was interesting information about the corn sweetener. I do think any sort of refined sugar is bad news. I’m always curious about the hormones in meat, too. I can’t decide which is worse-- refined sugar or red meat, chicken and pork.</p>
<p>TooRich: Given all the ways one can die, I think dying in one’s sleep has got to be one of the more desirable ways. 65 is too young, but not a bad way to go-- at all.</p>
<p>Mark,</p>
<p>I didn’t even know you were 30 pounds overweight, so how can you accuse me of judging you for that? That fact did not appear anywhere in your previous posts. I did not even know that you are overweight at all.</p>
<p>I was merely responding to your admission that you “got out of the habit” of healthy diet and exercise and that it is “a tremendous effort” to get back into such habit. I stand by my assertion that it is a cop-out to avoid healthy diet and exercise using such an excuse.</p>
<p>If you do not want others to comment on your lifestyle, then I suggest you not post details about it on a public forum.</p>
<p>Jack, agree, it’s a nice way to go but it was still a shock to us because he was still young, 65 is my guess. He was sort jovial and plum but not fat/obese or anything.</p>
<p>“Jack, agree, it’s a nice way to go but it was still a shock to us because he was still young, 65 is my guess. He was sort jovial and plum but not fat/obese or anything.”</p>
<p>Was he a smoker? COPD can easily kill by that age, especially for people who start young, which many smokers do.</p>
<p>There are no guarantees in life. You can improve the odds by diet, exercise, positive thinking, attending to health. Makes for better quality of life. But some things, genetics in particular are beyond our control. Be kind, appreciate what you’ve got, keep your affairs in order.</p>
<p>I don’t believe he was a smoker, at least not when he came to our house.</p>
<p>Momof2inCA: oh yes, believe me I understand nutrition. I was a biochem major. I didn’t go into detail, but my workout also includes sprints at top speed; I rev my metabolism plenty. When my (absolutely normal weight) sister stayed with me for a week, she lost weight–and she didn’t do the weights or the sprints, just walked with me. I did see an effect from the sprints, BTW: I started to walk so fast most of my friends (and my 6-foot-tall husband (I’m 5’3")) couldn’t keep up with me–and my HDL cholesterol, already at a desirable level, went up more. (Incidentally, I am basically quite healthy: numbers look good and all that. Just don’t look at the weight.) I maintained a “normal” weight until I had children–but something about pregnancy changed how my metabolism worked. I don’t know what. </p>
<p>Recent studies show that one reason people have trouble losing weight is their particular bacterial ecosystem varies. If you have access to the NYTimes archive, there are several nice articles summarizing that research. </p>
<p>Anyone who presumes that “eat less, exercise more” works for everyone is being presumptuous and insulting.</p>
<p>Most Americans have been spoiled by our affluence. As a result of the abundance available to us, we have not developed the skill of sacrifice and self-discipline to the extent our grandparents did. We often lack the ability to delay or decline gratification. Still, it’s unfortunate that the lack of self-control in eating behavior may be so easily judged, when the lack of restraint in selfish ambition, greed, gossip, gets a pass because it isn’t so immediately noticeable.</p>
<p>I am not fat, but I’d rather be fat than selfish or mean.</p>
<p>I heard a famous cardiologist interviewed on the radio. At 93 he still had his eyesight, his hearing, his stamina, and he was still working. The interviewer asked what had he done to ensure his health. His answer? “Pick the right parents.”</p>
<p>We don’t like to be powerless so we assume things are under our control. This is understandable. However, what is really disturbing here is some posters’ insistance on generalizing from their own experience and ignoring any experience or research that contradicts it. It would be like not understanding why you couldn’t shepherd your kids into Harvard if mine went there (they don’t.) </p>
<p>Validating others’ experience opens up areas of knowledge and empathy. Then Mollie has posted empirical studies to support my point of view as well as other posters. My very thin MIL claimed she was so skinny because she only ate 1/2 a chicken parm sandwich for lunch and saved the other half for her 3 o’clock snack. LOL.</p>
<p>I also noticed that Bay apologized to Markphotog on behalf of his wife, but no posters apologized to me or any other women whose feelings they hurt. Many PMed me about this.</p>
<p>I wonder what is being held onto so tightly. People used to shun lepers too. Turns out it was a bacterial infection! How about that.</p>
<p>Mini, dmd77 and others: You may be right. Certainly I never want to eat anything with corn syrup again, but it is hard to fix what was broken, (metabolism I mean) whether by stress, Childbirth, toncilectomy, menopause, or repeated courses of prednisone (I probably have all these causes.)</p>
<p>However, lack of compassion and blind coviction certainly don’t help matters any.</p>
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<p>Mythmom - I thank you for your candid comments about a topic that must be very hard for you to read. I was surprised to read a lot of the comments here of all places. I do not think anyone on this thread has taken a “pro” obesity stance in that I am assuming no one who hasn’t condemned is suggesting that people actually ATTEMPT to become obese or something. Only that there should be some understanding here that obese people aren’t all lazy or whatever. </p>
<p>I identify with your statements about luck vs virtue. I am relatively thin (not incredibly, but fit). And while I doubt my IQ is anywhere that high, I suppose it would be fairly above average. This confers on me the “privilege” of associating academically with other “above average” people. One of my biggest pet peeves is people who just act like they can’t suffer fools gladly. At governor’s school, at the end, everyone was whining about how they were going to have to go back home and “talk to everyone there, which is really annoying, because people aren’t that smart”. WHAT? Are you being serious with me? These people literally go through life thinking they’re better than the general population? They’re above talking to people? Hello, you didn’t choose your intelligence and furthermore you didn’t choose to be born to rich (by world standards) parents because like 99% of us were. </p>
<p>Like someone else said earlier, I don’t meet someone obese and automatically assume they’re lazier than me or I eat healthier (I try, but have plenty of room for improvement). Yes, a sedentary lifestyle and poor food choices IS a cause of obesity. This is obvious. We all know this. However there are some people who struggle with their weight and have their whole life, and they don’t eat differently than other people. I don’t presume to know. So while I agree we should do this and that to make our food healthier, that doesn’t mean I judge any individual I happen to come across. People don’t want to be obese. Yes, there is somewhat of a choice here in some regards and some situations, but it’s not as easy as some people want to make it out. Nor, IMO, is addiction to things like alcohol. I know a lot of smokers who would advise any young person to never touch a cigarette and would support any sort of program or movement to that effect, but they find it very hard to quit. The difference here is that we need food to live. When you’re a recovering alcoholic, or ex smoker, hopefully you never touch another drop or smoke another cigarette. But imagine if, in order to SURVIVE, you had to smoke just ONE a day or have one shot a day. This isn’t all that easy being able to cut it out entirely, and when people are addicted to food, it’s something they literally have to stare down in the face every second of every day. Just because some individuals can do this or that, doesn’t mean everyone can.</p>
<p>Princedog: What a nice post. And I know exactly what you mean. Last year when I was teaching over the summer I was the only instructor to be given an air conditioned room. The secretary who assigned rooms gave me the room because she felt that I was the only professor to treat her as an equal. I didn’t just treat her as an equal, she is my equal. (My IQ isn’t quite as high as my father’s either.)</p>
<p>This is stating a well-known fact, but I think it bears repeating: many people respond to stress and emotional pain by overeating. This is not the ideal response perhaps, but IMO it’s preferable to becoming an alcoholic, drug addict, smoker, control freak, or nasty grouch. We also respond to food in the way we learned while growing up. The attitudes we absorbed from our parents can be very hard to change. For example, when I was a child, dessert was always a reward. My mother kept a chart of demerits, and if we kids could make it through the week with few enough, we’d get a treat such as a soft ice cream cone. My “perfect” older sister always got ice cream, and I almost never did. Also, dessert (and rich food) was reserved for special, important people–namely adult guests who were friends of my parents. We didn’t usually have dessert around just for our family or just for us kids, but when company came then my mom would go all out. These attitudes, combined with some other dysfunctional stuff, caused me to view food as a way to love myself and tell myself I’m worthwhile. As you might guess, for years I struggled with various unhealthy eating habits. I still don’t have these completely under control. However, I am not otherwise lacking in self-discipline or concern for my health or appearance.</p>
<p>And, by the way, my older sister almost never ate veggies, regularly consumed a lot of chocolate and candy, didn’t play sports or exercise much, and yet was effortlessly thin as a teenager. Because of her metabolism and body type, in the eyes of my mother (and others too) she was oh so superior to my other sister and me. My other sister and I ate well and were physically active, but are built like our stocky German grandmother. But I’m here to tell you you reap what you sow. Let’s just say that now the tables are turned.</p>
<p>Ha GFG! That’s funny! My mom always told me that being aware of my weight and being athletic in high school would stand me in good stead later. She was right! I will never be willowy, but I am strong and fit and healthy and still close to my high school weight while those others who were more like your sister are, in fact, reaping what they sowed! Glad I learned that lesson early and didn’t have to struggle as I have seen my friends struggle. Just another good argument for health and nutrition education.</p>
<p>mythmom - excellent post (#110)! The tone of many of the posts on this thread surprises me. It’s interesting that so many posters don’t hesitate to make sweeping assumptions about others based upon appearances. I wonder if they can tell on sight which people with more acceptable BMIs have achieved them through such unhealthy behaviors as bulimia, anorexia, smoking, or drug abuse.</p>
<p>
I am really excited about this research – I think it’s a really novel insight and something we wouldn’t have been able to study until recently. The bacteria in our guts play a very important role in our metabolism, and one that hasn’t been investigated very deeply.</p>
<p>The role of stress is also interesting. A friend of mine is under the care of doctors and personal trainers, and exercises at a hospital facility. She is in incredible physical condition and eats very carefully. No matter what she has tried, she cannot lose weight in her abdomen though she has succeeded in dropping inches elsewhere. The facility staff finally told her several days ago that she needs to find a way to reduce her stress level or she will never lose that weight.</p>
<p>Well, I finally “got” this thread." It is really all about many people with an enormous need to be in total control of themselves and others. This forum after all exists for those who want to be in control. I was so upset that people felt it was their right to tell people having to use food stamps exactly what food they can buy and making them go to a class before they can buy it. Let’s just take ALL their pride;why leave any.Obviously spoken by people who have never been short on money or known people who are.</p>
<p>And, yes, being fat is unhealthy. But for all the eat less-lose lbs. people out there you need to understand that there is so much more going on in your bodies than that. In addition, some people are fat because of depression/anxiety/obsessive compulsion etc. So cut people a break because YOU don’t know what their deal is. That’s all I’m looking for here.</p>
<p>My mom gained a lot of weight and became very bloated when she was battling breast cancer and on steroids. Walking down the street she looked like just another fat person…and some of you would have treated her badly because you “believed” it was her fault.</p>
<p>Compassion, people. It makes the world a nicer place. </p>
<p>Props to the people on this thread who “get” it.</p>
<p>Re: Sax post #118</p>
<p>Beautiful!</p>
<p>I think most posters on here are speaking in general terms about a national problem–overeating and the resulting obesity. Most of us do “get it” and that’s why you see the personal anecdotes popping up: to demonstrate a few of the mitigating factors involved in weight gain and loss. Certainly, no one is railing against bloated cancer patients, overweight people with metabolic disorders, or the mentally ill or clinically depressed. </p>
<p>At the same time, these mitigating factors, personal anecdotes like mine, and even the corn syrup theory should not obfuscate the basic caloric equation which is the reason the majority of overweight Americans are FAT. Most people eat too much of the wrong things. PERIOD.</p>