<p>So far, my son has been too busy to work for pay. However, I do want to make one observation: my kids work much, much harder during the school year than I ever did. Counting time in school and homework, it is significantly more than a fulltime job. When you add in lessons, practicing, etc., it’s much, much more.</p>
<p>Different kids, different policies. S, a high level musician never held a summer job through high school, and even into undergrad. We deliberately discouraged it, as his practice schedule involved multiple ensembles, locations, and rotating schedules which made a summer job virtually impossible timewise. Realistically, he was also actively performing, and 2 gigs a month would exceed what he would have made working a month minimum wage and 30 hours a week. His undergrad summers were devoted to one two week paid faculty position at an adult chamber program, and music “internships”, performance festival/fellowship programs. He only applied to those that did not conflict with his contracted faculty position. He was able to find a year round part time job that still provides enormous flexibility in being gone for weeks at a time performing during summers without jepoardizing the job. He averages 35 hours a week when not performing, and provides about half his income; the other half is the sum of a variety of contracted orchestral and teaching jobs. He’ll continue this till he goes back to grad school.</p>
<p>On the other hand, D worked an average of 30 hours a week excepting soccer season in animal care positions from the age of 16. This is her chosen profession, and she continued to do so summers and breaks as an undergrad.
The workload did not affect her grades, she was accepted everywhere she applied and with substantial institutional merit and local scholarships. She now is a shift manager at the facility she worked in throughout the last two years of hs and college.</p>
<p>Financially, son had little disposable income, and thus more student loans in his name. D paid substantially towards her tuition from her savings, and thus has about a third of the amount her brother has in loans. Both kids knew we supported their school choices and career aspirations, and we funded the bulk of their educations, yet both were fully aware that a portion was to be on them, either from loans, or their savings.</p>
<p>You do what works the best for the individual situations, but the key is open communication and dialog, and everyone knowing the expectations and parameters.</p>
<p>Response to Shrink: This thread is simple. Does your teenager have a paid job this summer or not? Yes or No?<br>
We’re not comparing kids. Some kids are employed during the summer, some are not. Based on my experience and those around me, teenagers working summer jobs is the norm. It was suggested to me by a CC Poster that it was wrong for me to suggest that “most teenagers” work at summer jobs. This caused me to wonder and thus, this thread/poll was born to quell my curiosity. Nothing more, nothing less. When I linked this thread with the thread that you’re referring to regarding the mom dealing with her son’s behavior, it was to show that it is not unreasonable to set expectations for a teenager to work or be productive in other ways. </p>
<p>This is a simple poll–Does your teenager have a paying job over the summer?</p>
<p>Yes - they both worked paid jobs in summers during HS once they turned 16 - their choice - not something we required. That continues at college.</p>
<p>Offhand I would say of the kids we know the majority had summer jobs - those that have not are probably the exception. Offhand the only teen i know that I can think of who has never had a summer job is my D’s ex b/f who will be 20 soon and has never had a job - but that is a whole 'nother issue ;).</p>
<p>So simple poll - yes for both my kids. And yes for most kids we know.</p>
<p>edit: daughter did not work summer between jun/sen year because she spent 5 weeks in Europe on a girl scout trip plus a couple of weeks on other things - naval academy and a church mission trip.</p>
<p>It won’t be an effective poll, I fear, because the people who let their kids relax in the hammock all summer won’t respond, and they probably aren’t on CC anyway.</p>
<p>To clarify my post:</p>
<p>D: yes
S : not sure; depends if you count self-employment, or want W-2’s versus subcontractor’s 1099’s.</p>
<p>Hunt, true but it’s not meant to be scientific or accurate. I’m just wondering if my belief that most teenagers work during the summer is far off base. This is a casual way of finding out. It’s kind of fun to see the responses.</p>
<p>LOL–self employed is employed in my book. Mowing lawns, working for cash (off the books), babysitting, etc.–it’s all work.</p>
<p>Okay…</p>
<p>Ss did not work during high school summers. One went to music camp and the other to academic camps. They both worked during summer in college. S2 also works during school year.</p>
<p>19 year old son has a summer job. (We insisted). 16 year old daughter does not and we will not insist on it until she attends college.</p>
<p>nysmile - in our area (average small town America) anyway, you are not far off base at all. All of my kids’ friends work - even those from families with “means”.</p>
<p>Shrinkrap - are you offended in some way by the question? I am puzzled.</p>
<p>No, I am not offended. I just think it might be unfair to imply that we can decide whose “normal” and whose not. I try to be very cautious about things like that, but maybe that’s just me.I find it a little disconcerting that the only answers permitted are yes or no, without looking at the complexities of each of families situations.I think there are enough people who come to CC who feel intimidated because either they or their child don’t measure up. And I admit that I have felt that way.</p>
<p>Where I live, lots of kids don’t work. My kids friends who work are mostly employed by their parents or their friends parents. Of course I’m not counting babysitting, pet sitting, reffing, volunteering, or just looking, but “yes or no” doesn’t allow for all that.</p>
<p>Shrinkrap - I think you are interpreting “norm” differently from the OP. Does the “Shrink” in your name have anything to do with that?</p>
<p>Yes and no - my S working 2 days/week as an unpaid internship and working other days at a paid part time job.</p>
<p>D1 worked from the time she turned 16 (hard to do so before 16, except babysitting which she did do). She’s been there for 2 1/2 years and is now a manager. D1 just turned 16 and isn’t working this summer because she fell into a really interesting internship that’s just perfect for her. She’s out the door at 8:15 every morning and comes home around 4. Some elements of work do come into play, but no money. She is however, learning a lot, which has to count for something. She does have a job working year-round as a teen correspondent for our local newspaper and she gets paid for her published stories, which is just enough for money in her pocket. If this summer thing goes well, it will turn into paid position for the rest of high school, which would be a dream come true because it’s tied directly to her life plans.</p>
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</p>
<p>Remeber, this is a sample from a group of CC parents, not of the entire US. This survery will be substantially different compared to a survey given to non-CC parents.</p>
<p>I think it is about 50/50. I am a college student, so I mainly associate with college students. </p>
<p>A lot of students I know get employment from family members.</p>
<p>This was the context of the original post…</p>
<p>“His behavior sounds familiar (not the pot)- sleeping, not doing much, et al- typical for age.”</p>
<p>Followed by</p>
<p>'This is not the typical behavior of a 17-19 year old. By this age, most have successfully worked at summer jobs. Most earn their own money and pay for their personal expenses such as gas money, date money, clothes money, entertainment money, etc. Most 17-19 year old do not sit around the house doing nothing. Most 17-19 year olds understand their responsibilities and try their best to meet the expectations set for them. '</p>
<p>Now I talk to and about teenagers all day long (yes shrink does mean shrink), and granted they are seeing me for a reason. I think these are laudable ambitions, and expectations. Still, I did not think spending a lot of time doing “nothing” was abnormal. I did not say it wasn’t, I just asked if there was a way to know if this was so. That’s what generated the poll.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>I think few teenagers pay for their own gas money and clothes money. I did though always pay for my entertainment money.</p>
<p>I remember a poll that was contucted in my high school newspaper. They asked how many people who pay for their own gas. The poll showed that parents paid for 70% of their children’s gas.</p>
<p>In the end, I think it should be up to the teenager whether he/she should work. If they are able to stretch their birthday, Christmas money, etc., I think that is great. They are going to work for the next 40 years of their lives. They should be given the opportunities to have free time when they have the chance.</p>
<p>S1 (rising first year in college)-- Had a couple of odd jobs fixing computers and tutoring, but his first "real’ job is this summer as a teacher at a computer camp. He knows he’s expected to get a job (10 hrs/wk) during the year while in college and work during the summers FT, though if a special opportunity arose, we’d have to talk. Last summer he did research, which brought him far more scholarship $$ than a paid job would have, so he has earned his keep. This kid doesn’t spend a lot, so he could make what he has in his bank account at the end of this summer last for at least two years, including buying textbooks.</p>
<p>S2 (rising HS junior) was a CIT last year, got a token honorarium. Is doing it again this summer, plus working for a catering firm (though with the economy, it’s not as many hours as he had hoped). He does both catered events as well as work in the warehouse, so it’s a good chance to see what real work involves! His idea, and he made the calls to make it happen. He finds it a welcome break from his intense IB program. Is also doing weight training and Driver’s Ed now that the CIT job has finished. He is also about to do some renovation work on our back porch for which I will pay him – his efforts will save me a bundle and it will benefit the entire family.</p>