MIL/FIL are buying a house but have decided they are not moving there after all. They close this week and expect to put it back on the market immediately. FIL is freaking out about the loss they are probably going to take. The whole thing is my fault, but I don’t see how we could cover the loss, given our own obligations. Also, they wouldn’t be inclined to let us do that. They are considering putting it up “for sale by owner” for a month prior to listing with the realtor. I think the house will sell quickly, but it’s a problem if it’s not in the listings.
If they back out of the deal at this point, they will lose their escrow money, I assume. Is that better or worse than going through with the purchase, having carrying costs for a month or two, and then selling it?
Plus they will have to pay realtor’s fees and quite possibly excise tax on the sale (the latter, if your state charges it, applies even if the house is FSBO).
I suggest you speak with an agent immediately and try to estimate the costs of reselling this house. Balance that against the escrow money you lose. Plus, money lost has no time/effort component. All the time and effort that family has to expend to make the resale happen should be factored into the equation.
^I think the escrow is probably more, and FIL would want to take the chance on trying to sell. Also, since everything is set for the closing, they seem intent on doing that. Situation is not helped by the fact that they know the sellers.
Yikes! Sounds like the emotions of the situation will complicate trying to mitigate losses. Any chance of convincing them to move into the home, like if the house doesn’t sell, or if the offers that come in are much lower?
They thought they should downsize and get a ranch because they have major mobility issues. Now they want to stay in the house they’ve owned for a long time. Moving is too much for them. I was the one who found the other house and encouraged them to consider it. They are in their 80’s and don’t want to deal with being landlords. It’s probably a nightmare.
Apparently, they offered to let the owner keep the deposit, but they want OUT and refused, so the closing is still on.
As far as FSBO, my H and sibs were thinking of that with their mom’s house. Quickly ruled it out when thinking about the hassles of showing it and drawing up a sales contract and qualifying buyers. There are FSBO sites where you can get it on the MLS for cheaper than a full blown realtor contract though.
Is it the physical challenges, or the emotional ones?
Sorry – I realize I just echoed @surfcity. But it is a very important distinction. I think you need to reassure them – heavily – that they really do need this move.
Buyer’s remorse is a well known phenomenon. Seller’s remorse, too. I assume they did not sell their house yet. My grandmother had too hard a time deciding what to pack and what to leave when she had to move and downsize. It just seemed too overwhelming. But there was no way she could continue to live in the big house. Solution was a storage unit so items could be moved in and out whenever she changed her mind. That way it did not seem so final. It lasted for a good 6+ months. If you could convince them to try it for a while they may like it after they get there.
Me and my sibs moved my mom. A tremendous downsize. She just waltzed out one door and into the next. She went to my sisters for the day while we had the movers come get what would fit in her next place. We got the next place all set up, clothes, knick knacks out, etc. She came back to a beautiful new place with all her familiar items. We still kept the old place as we figured out what to do with items. Over the months she remembered stuff she wanted, switched things up, and it gave us time to sell, give away everything else.
If it is a good idea, see if you all handle the move if they’d try it out for a few months to see.
It’s overwhelming for them. The house they have has a yard like the garden of Eden. She is emotionally attached to the house and the yard. We’re not going to keep trying, even though it would probably be best. We have to go forward with the facts on the ground. If we can get it on the MLS, it would probably help things. Fortunately, they are only here about 5 months of the year, as they winter over in the south.
Their other children were split, from the sounds of it. To the extent that they had anything to do with this decision, I’m not particularly happy with right now.
Have you considered hiring a property manager for a rental?
My parents had a situation sort of similar. Mom is 74 and dad is 78. He has back problems and sometimes has balance issues and it is just a matter of time until the steps are a bad idea. A chair lift is not something he would consider. He believes my mom will outlive him so he wanted to move to a 55+ community so she can be settled. They closed on the new house in December. They finally had the movers come this week and are listing big house on Tuesday. Dad kept finding projects that had to be done before the move. He admitted that he was only moving for my mom. He wouldn’t let them show the house until it was perfect and all his stuff was out (except some furniture.)
Dad insisted the new house (new build) have a full basement and an extended garage. It is not much of a downsize at all, its the biggest model and he has the basement, but he is giving up his yard and his pool, and some privacy of course because the new houses are closer together. It was rough for my mom to prod him along, but they are finally moving. He has slept at the old house the past 3 nights on the sofa (they left some furniture to show the house with) because he still has more stuff he wants to do.
We don’t think he cares if he ever moved to the new house. He just wanted to know that there is a place in case he needed it (first floor master) or in case he dies, so my mom wouldn’t have to find a place for herself, assuming she would want neighbors her age and no lawn maintenance. Now he knows she will be closer to us and have friends in her new neighborhood. FOr now, they are both fairly active so I hope they can get involved in some activities. It might be a whole new world for my dad. New “victims” for him to spread his stories and wisdom too…
Is there any chance you can convince one of them that the other would be better off moving? For us, the new house is 10 minutes from my brother and 25 from me, vs 1 hr 15 minutes to their old house. That was part of the reason for the move too.
See if you have any of the reasons that we did for our folks to move ( smaller home, be with neighbors of their own age–or younger really since it’s 55+ and they are in their 70’s) Closer to children in case they need help due to illness, smaller home to deal with in case one of them passes or they get even less mobile. Maybe they should just keep both houses for a bit, spend some time at the new one and see how they feel. And, as I said, maybe get a property manager (typical fee is one month rent) and rent it, because if something changes they may decide they need to move after all. All this, of course, if they can AFFORD it. Mine could. Maybe they could give you or a sibling power of attorney strictly to deal with the property mgt company.
If your in laws are only there for five months, why not be in a one floor, smaller and safer dwelling during those five months?
Since they are having the closing, I would not make a decision for a month about what to do. Check out the new house empty, offer to arrange for movers. Offer to help transplant flowers to the new house.
If your ILs definitely do want to go through the transaction:
(1) Have a real estate attorney look over the contract.
(2) Look to see if there is ANY condition precedent (contingency) to closing the sellers failed to satisfy --> this would allow buyers to walk away
(3) Look to see if there is any condition the buyers can fail to satisfy --> this would cause the sellers’ obligation to terminate
(4) Look to see what happens if buyers fail to satisfy any of the conditions to closing --> would it constitute a breach of the contract by buyers
(5) What are the liquidated damages if your ILs breach the contract and do not go through with closing
(6) If the escrow deposit (or whatever constitutes liquidated damages in the contract) is not that big a hit, your ILs might consider walking away from the transaction rather than closing and trying to resell with its attendant risks and carrying costs
(7) Ask the real estate attorney whether there is ANY way in your state that a seller can compel specific performance of a real estate transaction, i.e., sue to force the buyers to buy
If they are having mobility issues, not moving into the ranch may mean moving into assisted living or someplace else in the near future. Do they understand that? I would push to get them into the ranch. I like eyemamom’s idea of letting them stay at your house while you and others move them into the new house. Hire professional movers to help and I’m sure the improtant stuff can be moved in one day. And with regards to the yard, they can hire a professional landscaper to come in and make the new yard a Garden of Eden.