<p>DH and I were invited to our friends’ daughter’s quince</p>
<p>Think of it as an event on par with a wedding.</p>
<p>Give what you would give for a bar mitzvah. Yes cash-- in amounts similar to what you would give for a bar mitzvah-- is an appropriate gift.</p>
<p>Remember this gift calculator? </p>
<p>[The</a> Envelope](<a href=“http://www.theweddingenvelope.com/calculator.php]The”>http://www.theweddingenvelope.com/calculator.php)</p>
<p>It is for wedding gifts, but may help you figure something out.</p>
<p>Some of us have never been to a bar mitzvah or a quincenera! 
But I know from wedding gift threads, amounts vary by region, so I can offer no advice! Have fun!</p>
<p>I tried the above calculator, and the amount was way over what is traditionally given around here (like over twice as much), perhaps they should split western PA and eastern PA!</p>
<p>Black and White sounds like this is a “themed” party. Go ahead and ask the mom about your outfit. She might not care. The wardrobe idea may be more for the kids than for the parent generation. It also is OK to ask about gifts, etc. </p>
<p>The “ceremony” part depends on the family’s own traditions and local fads/fashions. The quince I attended included a Roman Catholic mass at midday, and a buffet dinner party with dancing attended by about 50 people that the evening. Almost all of the gifts were $15 Target or Barnes & Noble gift cards.</p>
<p>Just ran that calculator from “The Envelope”. The figure it comes up with is roughly 10 times what I’d shell out for a wedding present. Clearly the authors live on a different planet from our family!</p>
<p>i ran the calculator and it came up with $355! I’d spend that much for a wedding present for my kid, maybe. I would never give that much for a bar/bat mitzvah either.</p>
<p>I just threw in the vitals for my SILs 2nd wedding for fun and I actually laughed out loud when I saw how much the calculator figured.
Not bloody likely.
;)</p>
<p>One of our housekeepers from El Salvador invited us to her niece’s quincanera . It is certainly possible that customs differ depending on country. It was like a debutante ball. There was a choreographed dance. The girl was introduced…And it was a very nice party. </p>
<p>I remember giving the girl an evening purse.</p>
<p>I recently hosted our daughter’s quinceanera with a party in the NYC suburbs.</p>
<p>A quinceanera is probably best compared to a Sweet 16 party, with some being very extravagant and others more modest. Our party was mainly for teens, held at a nice catering hall - buffet dinner and a DJ.</p>
<p>The girls tended to dress in fancy (and skimpy!) cocktail dresses, but the boys seemed to be more casually dressed. The boys all wore nice pants and collared shirts, but only about half wore ties.</p>
<p>Most gifts were cash, and in our case we let people know that a portion of the gift proceeds would be donated to charity. Gifts ranged from about $20 to $50, with most in the $30-$50 range. Lots of gift cards, and a few pieces of jewelry.</p>
<p>Wow, lots of great replies! Gift calculator has me giving $240…um, no, I don’t think so. If this event truly is comparable to a Bar Mitzvah, than I shall look up what these friends gave to my kids 5 and 8 years ago…Are we all in agreement on that? :)</p>
<p>If it matters, it’s at a Knights of Columbus hall, and there is a small Eiffel Tower on the invite…possibly a French theme?</p>
<p>I just ran that gift calculator with various different scenarios. It said that a person whose income is $25K, has attended no wedding festivities, and has to pay for a domestic flight to get there should give $155. Yeah, and not eat for two weeks? Have they ever lived on $25K? I doubt it. </p>
<p>Thank you, costblog, for your insight.</p>
<p>Bar Mitzvah gifts are usually in denominations of $18, just FYI, sokeep that in mind when you are looking at your records.</p>
<p>I would definitely ask the mom about dress especially since you are friends. </p>
<p>As for that calculator - WAYY more than I would spend on a wedding!</p>
<p>Oh, yes, surfcity, I do give Bar Mitzvah gifts in denominations of $18, but this family does not know of Jewish customs, just as I do not know of theirs. Hence all of my questions!
Just sent a text to the mom about dress code. I imagine that, as at a Bar Mitzvah, the kids (girls!) will be dressed to the nines! No one will be looking at me & DH.</p>
<p>bethiev, I ran the calculator with scenarios similar to weddings we have attended in the past and came up with $335! Um…no. We generally spend around $100-$150.</p>
<p>The mom just told me black dress pants and a white shirt (and tie) for the men, jacket optional, black or b&w dress for the ladies. If the men don’t have to wear jackets, I am thinking it’s not a terribly formal affair. Right???</p>
<p>I’m thinking not horribly formal, but that you and your DH had best wear your dancing shoes!</p>
<p>I do not know how much I’d give at a Qunicenera (I also don’t know how to make the tilde on the n) but I usually give about $30 for a Bar Mitzvah for one of my son’s “regular” friends and about $50 for a very close friend. </p>
<p>That envelope link has me scratching my head. Apparently, I’m supposed to give different amounts according to the day of the week and what clothes I wear. I find that bizarre. Shouldn’t my gift be in accordance with how close I am to the couple, and how much I can afford? It’s not like it’s a ticket to an event.</p>
<p>I should note, that I even before I got that far I was annoyed. How can someone make a drop down menu of states and not include DC? This is a pet peeve of mine.</p>
<p>With a drop down menu that includes VT, there will not be many expensive ethnic events. You can consider yourself a Vermonter for now.</p>