<p>northstarmom, I remember a saying I heard - Just because you have a broken leg doesn’t make my stubbed toe feel any better. One cannot compare pain. There will always be grief in this world, and someone else’s worse misfortune does not make someone else’s less. Losing a loved one is still losing a loved one, no matter how “prepared” one is. I know. Those of us who lost a loved one and I lost 2, one unexpectedly, and one with “preparation.” The loss is the loss and the pain is still there. Can’t we just say we are grateful to have had him with us as long as we did, and are in pain that we won’t have him longer? My pain doesn’t compare to his family’s who knew him. That doesn’t make my pain any less relevant. He lived, not as a hero that we have labelled him, but as an honest, introspective, ethical man who, through no effort on is part other than being himself, made us see him as a role model. God bless him and his family.</p>
<p>I think how we look at what happened to Randy Pausch may reflect our overall life view. I was in an accident a few years ago that left me with a minor deformity on a body part that is visible. Yes, I was sad about it, but I still felt fortunately that I had an intact body for so long, and that I didn’t suffer an even worse deformity. I never wondered “why me” or became angry feeling that life was unfair. I just moved on with my life.</p>
<p>When it comes to Randy Paush, of course I understand that his family would be grieving his death. At the same time, I think his family – wife and kids-- are fortunate to have had such love and devotion – including a record of that love and devotion - and to have so many people who are aware of their loss. Add to that, they have extended family and apparently also have financial security.</p>
<p>Pausch squeezed a lot of love and devotion into the short time that he had with his wife and children. His family had the blessing of having more time with a loving father/husband than many families have even though the man of the household lives to old age.</p>
<p>To get back to the stubbed toe/broken leg analogy, to a person who has no legs, a person who has the pain of stubbed toe or broken leg would seem to be lucky indeed.</p>
<p>I debated for a few days about whether or not I should share this with people, but I always get so much appreciative feedback when I do, that I thought I’d post it here, in light of Randy Pausch’s life and death(and all other loved ones who have died):</p>
<pre><code> Death
</code></pre>
<p>Death is not the end of life, it is a change in our life, it is the transition of our spirit.</p>
<p>When we die, we complete the circle of life: we return to where we began… with God.</p>
<p>We never lose those we love. They are always with us, even after death.</p>
<p>Death is a change in our relationship. It is only a physical limitation.</p>
<p>We remember them, the idea of who they were, their persona, their personality, the emotions that they represented in our lives. Those feelings we experience when we were with them are always with us. All of that, we can recall.</p>
<p>Death only changes the way we related to them, the way we communicate with them.</p>
<p>It ends our limitations. After their death we only have to think and they will know and understand.</p>
<p>They are no longer limited by the time and space of this physical world.</p>
<p>They are able to be with everyone they love at the same time, in the same instant.</p>
<p>They are always with you. Think of them, and you can feel their presence.
Remember them – those you love. They remember you.</p>
<p>Death is the final challenge of our life, of our human experience, that we must endure before we again become spirits reunited with our family of spirits and God.</p>
<p>Death is the way home.</p>
<p>To no longer fear death, to see death as a transition, a change, the return to the spirit, that is our destination.</p>
<p>It is the end of our life, the close of our human experience, the conclusion of this human venture. It is our return to God.</p>
<p>Thank all those who have helped with this life, both on earth and in heaven, both here and beyond.</p>