Rate My USC Transfer Essay!!

College Essays
1

I know its bad, but I’m a little stuck on how to answer the question…

I love Pittsburgh. It’s the city where I was born, it’s the city where I went to high school, and it’s currently also the city where I attend college. I originally thought that going to school in the same town I’ve lived in my entire life would be advantageous; I thought that a familiar environment, familiar people, and a familiar city would all help me achieve my own academic goals and help me to become a person. It had worked for me all through high school.

Upon going to college, I quickly realized that familiarity, while comfortable, was not what was best for me. Suddenly, the city that I thought necessary for my own prosperity became suffocating. I felt as though in staying in the same place I knew that I had missed an opportunity to experience something new and plant my roots somewhere else. I want be FROM Pittsburgh, not IN Pittsburgh.

Rather, Los Angeles has always been the city that I’ve dreamed of living in. Every job or occupation I’ve imagine having in the future as always been set in the backdrop of sunny Los Angeles, California. Aside from being in my dream city, the University of Southern California is a top university in the field of business. Rather than having a vast majority of business majors to choose from, the University of Southern California focuses on three specific ones, attracting some of the best professors in the field. With the cost of a college education as high as it is, there is no one who places as high a value on it as the University of Southern California.

2

it’s b+ rate essay. I don’t like the 2nd paragraph because it’s to negative. 1st paragraph is idk how to explain it. It’s okay writing quality but it kinda feels like a high school freshman wrote it. It’s not really college level if that makes sense. 3rd paragraph is what a lot of people would say about LA.

If this is the USC supplemental essay then I would write about what courses you want to take at Marshall instead. Although USC is mostly stats based and I’m sure you can get accepted with this essay assuming your GPA is over 3.7 with an A in Calc.

3

Thanks for your feedback! This is actually the Common App essay that I tried to tailor to USC. I’ve never been a good writer, but my first semester in college I got a 3.9 and I had a 5 on AP Calc so I’m pretty solid in that regard

4

Answer the UC prompt instead. It gives better guidance on what you are supposed to say.

5

I didn’t know that I had an option to chose. I was under the impression I had to answer both. If that’s the case that makes things so much easier

6

I mean that the Common App prompt:

is too broad.

Whereas the UC prompt:

gives much better guidance.

For USC Supp talk about what courses you want to take at USC / Why Marshall? over other business schools.

7

You spend too much time not getting to the point. Paragraphs one and two are about Pittsburg… What they want to know is why specifically you want to go to USC. You only provided really one vague sentence about USC. Don’t talk about wanting to be in LA. Be most specific about the major you are interested in and how the department at UCS fulfills those needs. Do some research. Are there Nobel Laureates or other influential
ppl in the department from whom you want to learn? How do the academics at UCS privide a better foundation for your later endeavors.

Don’t write it to the UC prompt. The UC prompt is a lot about your personal experiences. Follow the USC prompt. It is more directed at their actual dept. Why do you need to go to USC and for what outcome?

8

I’d agree with the post above. I suggest finding a way to combine paragraphs 1 & 2. As a USC student, I can tell you that they’ll want to see specifically how you can benefit from and contribute to the Marshall School of Business. Mention the name, find a program or a class or something to mention and BE SPECIFIC! Good luck & fight on!