<p>“Why Do You Want to Study at Columbia Blah blah blah”</p>
<p>The world was a much different place the day King George II put pen to paper and signed the Royal Charter that founded Kings College, later to become Columbia University. He could not have known that the land in which this college was being founded would one day secede from his own and, later, become more powerful than any other country on earth. He could not know that, one day, the greatest city in the world would rise up around the educational institution he founded: complimenting it, collaborating with it.
The world now is a very different place than it was that day; and it is the people that graduated from universities like Columbia that made it so. Whatever phrase youd prefer to use, Columbia graduates are the intellectuals, the geniuses, the doers, as some say: the kind of people who, centuries after their death, will still be impacting the world, or currently still are. John Jay, Alexander Hamilton, Milton Friedman, Theodore Roosevelt, and Barack Obama immediately come to mind.
Institutions like Columbia have shaped the world we live in, and made America what it is: a versatile, technologically advanced, beautiful, free country, far ahead of almost every other country in almost every field imaginable. I hope that, someday, I will be able to don the blue and white, and call myself a Columbian; for that is the start that, it seems, most of this countrys revolutionary men favor; and I hope it will do me as much good as it has done them.</p>
<p>If this is all of it, i would give this essay a 3 out of 10.<br>
isn’t the essay supposed to be around 500 words long?
the whole first paragraph is actually harmful to your application. Obviously the admissions office knows the background of Columbia and does not need a history lesson.<br>
You barely answered the prompt. You talked about how columbia grads are leaders, but in truth not everyone will be a leader. You need to talk about what specific advantages of the school you hope to take, as well as what you hope to contribute to the university.</p>
<p>First of all, it’s not gonna fit in the Columbia application. They only allow you like 300 characters? I don’t remember writing more than 100 words.
Second, it doesn’t really answer the question. The key to answering this type of prompt is to make it as specific as possible. Be concise and precise. Trim the language. Show the adcom that you’ve a clear idea WHY you want to go there and WHY you’re a good fit for Columbia. Yours provides neither. It sounds flowery, but ultimately ineffective.</p>
<ol>
<li>I like this a lot.</li>
<li>I think that it would hurt you.</li>
</ol>
<p>This is very well written and I like your use of parallelism. However, I think that when colleges ask that question, “Why Columbia?” they don’t want an applicant to stroke their ego (too much). Perhaps instead of just stating that Columbia is a great school, you could incorporate how it’s a great school for you. Maybe talk about activities, programs, clubs, teachers that you would want to be involved with…?</p>
<p>This style of writing is great, but I don’t think it would attract the attention of the admissions officers. The problem is that you didn’t mention yourself until the last sentence, and most of the essay was used to flatter the school. To improve it, you could have made it more personal, described the characteristics you have that would relate yourself to those people you describe who’ve gone to Columbia. I think they get a lot of essays which talk about what a great school they are, so add some personality and it will be fabulous :)</p>
<p>Yea, I agree with all the posts above. It is very well written, but, as I read along, the only thing that was in my mind was: “so what about you?”</p>
<p>The word you are looking for in the last sentence of the first paragraph is “complementing,” not “complimenting.” They are homophones but mean different things. Also, the word “impact” can be used as a noun but not a verb. It would be proper to say “centuries after their death, still have an impact on the world”.</p>
<p>I don’t think your essay gives very compelling reasons as to why you want to study at Columbia. The very same thing that you said could be said about Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Stanford, Duke, Vanderbilt, Michigan…hell, the very same generic essay could be written about ANY college someone wanted to attend. “There were people who went here who got very famous and did some good things” is generally not a good idea to want to go to a school all on its own.</p>
<p>It seems that you like Columbia’s location and the tradition in which it is built; there are so many other things that you can highlight about Columbia:</p>
<p>-New York City and the opportunities it presents
-The diversity of Columbia students and alumni
-The alumni network
-The Core Curriculum, if that appeals to you</p>
<p>On and on ad nauseum.</p>
<p>Besides, this essay says very little about YOU and why you want to study at Columbia. Put yourself in it. Do you want to be a statesman? An economist like Friedman? (I hope you say no to that, lol.) What do you want to be? Not necessarily your career, but what kinds of things in your life do you want to do and how will Columbia help you reach those goals?</p>