Rational Thinking or Rationalization

Parents Forum
1

<p>Until last week, it appeared that we were going to have an incredibly angst free maiden voyage into the college selection and application process. My oldest daughter had very specific thoughts on what she wanted in a college, did extensive research, and formulated a list. We did visits, and the school at the top of her list (because it is top of the line in her intended major, and because she really, really liked the school and people on her visit) is also an absolute safety for her. We thought the process was over.</p>

<p>During the last several weeks, my daughter has been bombarded at school with questions as to why she would choose a school rated between 75-100 on the USNews list when she had the credentials to go higher. She explained that her choice was great for what she wanted, she liked the school better than she liked other, higher rated overall schools we’ve visited, and she felt very comfortable with her choice, but she did confess to us that she felt a little left out of the excitement being felt by her friends who were going through the selection and application process, and a little defensive about the questioning. Ultimately, she added two schools to her application list, for a total of three overall. </p>

<p>Last night, she told me that she was very, very likely to attend her original first choice school if she gets into the school’s Honors Program. She says that would make her first two years better, because it would put her with a brighter group of students in any intro classes she doesn’t place out of via AP testing. If she doesn’t get into Honors (I think it’s very likely that she will), then the other schools will be more appealing to her. My wife thinks she’s looking for a hook to better explain her choice to others, and that this is rationalization instead of rational analysis.</p>

<p>Ultimately, whatever she’s comfortable with works for us. I’m curious though–for those who have recent experience with big school Honors Programs (I was in one 30+ years ago–it made some difference to the educational experience, but not a ton of difference), how much of the difference in experience is substantive, and how much is ego?</p>

2

<p>Perhaps the biggest advantage of an honors program relates neither to substance nor to ego but rather to the opportunity it provides for the most seriously academic students on campus to easily meet and get to know each other. This is also, in my opinion, the main justification for high school magnet programs. It’s all about the people.</p>

3

<p>From personal experience I have three University Honors Program data points. One experience was “substance” one was “ego” and one was “I was assigned to the program as a freshman and the program pretty much dried up before I graduated.” I think it would be worth the time and effort to talk with a few students at the university’s Honors House to get their opinions.</p>

4

<p>I agree with Marian.</p>

<p>I could have written your post last spring. We have a VERY driven D, who graduated 1st in her class at a large high school here in Colorado. Throughout high school, all we heard was, “I want to get out of Colorado for college.” </p>

<p>The summer before her senior year, she chose Georgetown as her #1 school. Filled out all the online stuff, got her name into their system, etc. Applied EA in the fall. Was accepted EA. We wanted her to have some other options, so she applied to UCLA, the University of Colorado-Honors College, and 2 other “reaches”. Was accepted to UCLA and CU, but not to the reaches.</p>

<p>We visited all three schools and had a great time [except for the geographically-(ego)centric California kids, which is another issue]. I have to admit that H and I really got caught up in the “prestige” thing about the schools. We were ready to spend $50,000+ to do the Georgetown thing, and we would spend $40,000+ for UCLA. Whatever she wanted.</p>

<p>But that’s NOT what she wanted. She wanted CU-Boulder. Quite a bit further down on the rankings. H and I were NOT happy at first. How could she pass up these opportunities? D just felt that CU was the best “fit” for her. So after some inital grumblings, we agreed. And she started there this August.</p>

<p>And the result? It was the best decision for her. H and I were wrong; I’ll admit it (although I think she would have done well almost anywhere). She’s happy, academically challenged, involved, loves almost everything about it there. Plus, with AP credits, she tested out of 38 hours of prerequisites and entered CU as an almost-second-semester sophomore. So she saved us a boatload of $$$$. And you can’t beat in-state tuition, especially if you have a child that will in all likelihood be going on to do graduate school of some sort. The CU Honors College allows her registration priority and offers certain classes that only Honors students may take. It was a “win”.</p>

<p>Let your daughter and your family evaluate what school is the best fit for her, and don’t let the “rankings” or others “thought” sway you. Opinions are like bellybuttons - everyone has one. </p>

<p>Good luck!!</p>

5

<p>If your family can afford the extra two applications, let her do it. If she changes her mind by April (which often happens), she’ll have choices. Sometimes, girls don’t take risks because they are afraid of failing. Let her have all of her options open, then make a decision based on those options in April. It’s a drop in the bucket compared to college costs and will be well worth the peace of mind. Messy things happen with safeties, too. Maybe the admissions person who reads her application thinks, “Betty Sue? That’s the name of the woman who stole my husband and ran over my cat!” I would NOT recommend only one school on an application list. Even if you apply ED, once you find out that you aren’t in, you only have two weeks to get other applications in.</p>

6

<p>I would help her assess whether she’s made a choice based on lots of data and her gut feel about what’s right for her, or if she’s choosing the safe option with no risk of rejection, where she’ll stay in her comfort zone as one of the top top students. I think it’s great if she’s picked a school based on what she needs and where she’ll grow… it’s not so great if she’s turning off the option of stretching herself out of risk aversion.</p>

<p>However, not to beat a dead horse (I find myself posting this a lot in September to newbie parents) a minority of kids end up majoring in what they thought they’d major in when they left HS. Many, many kids transfer because their college doesn’t have the program they find out they want; many kids dump their Freshman year major pretty quickly, and you don’t want her regretting where she is if her particular program turns out to be a poor fit.</p>

<p>So-- kids who like science and math are encouraged to be engineers (Engineering programs are significantly more rigorous than even the best HS’s math and science programs). Kids who love literature are encouraged to be English majors… and so forth. College doesn’t break down neatly into the “math/foreign language/history” subjects that kids know from HS. There are neat disciplines like linguistics and urban planning and anthropology and operations research that kids have never been exposed to in HS so a choice at age 17 about a kids future needs to be taken with a huge grain of salt.</p>

<p>My favorite was a neighbors kid who ended up an ethnomusicologist (yes, you can actually get jobs doing that). Who the heck takes ethnomusicology in HS???</p>