@Marian - Sorry you took that the wrong way (maybe because it was personal for you). I meant it as a positive — to accept the kids as they are and for what they can and cannot do. If your kid isn’t ivy league material, then accept them for that. But for me at least, I would not be happy if they have the gifts and skills to do well in a class, for example, and never put in an effort and never did the homework. (FYI, this is all hypothetical anyway, as my kids are very self-motivated kids)
I made the same choice and don’t consider that a negative at all. And I think I did the best I could for my children. My husband choose a less paying but more satisfying career as well. So some might say he also “achieved less”. But I couldn’t be more proud of my husband. So, if my kids made that same choice as either of us did, that would be fine with me too. As long as they are doing their best at what they chose and are happy.
And you should be happy with your choice, an perhaps your mother is looking down on you— proud of you for being you and for raising your kids.