<p>My favorite is when my d received a static shock and replied, “Ouch, I think my skin bit me”. or "Do boobs float?</p>
<p>Once, when my son was three, he walked in while I was in the buff, nursing his younger brother. My son looked at me and said, “Mommy! You’re not wearing any socks!!”</p>
<p>I just read this entire thread. DS2 contributed the family’s term for the thing that controls the TV - the “roly mote” of course!</p>
<p>DS1 announced when he was 3 that he knew what letter “church” started with. When I asked which one he said “t”. I said, “No, church doesn’t start with ‘t’”. He said with a disgusted tone “well then how come there’s a ‘t’ (cross) outside all the churches”?? I always wanted to send that one to Reader’s Digest.</p>
<p>Age four.
Son stands in the living room, weight on one leg, the other hip cocked.
He announces, “Mom, I KNOW what I am doing.”</p>
<p>These are all so precious. Great memories.</p>
<p>My son was 2 when his sister was born. After a week, he had made up his mind. “Rachel is dust. Sweep her out the door!”</p>
<p>About the same age walking backwards, “I don’t have eyes in the back of me head!”</p>
<p>Age 5 in all seriousness: “Can I get a color photocopier for Christmas?”</p>
<p>When my son was very young, he would, with great seriousness, intone “Great minds think of light.”</p>
<p>Little older but about 1st grade, son came home with ‘fisix’ written on a piece of paper in response to ‘what do you want to do when you grow up?’ Don’t know where he got it, but he’s off to college in a month to study physics.</p>
<p>Election Day 2000: Son (who was then in third grade) wakes up that morning and asks in all seriousness, “Mama, what if there’s a tie?”</p>
<p>And in first grade dear Daughter (who’s now 21) was assigned the standard: Draw a picture and write a sentence about what you want to be when you grow up.</p>
<p>Her response: “I want to be a silly doodle”</p>
<p>son: (age 3) finger raised, like a professor making an important point “I am a cautious little boy.”</p>
<hr>
<p>mom “Why did you hit Alex?” (son, age 7) “Because he merited it.”</p>
<hr>
<p>daughter (age 7) to our neighbor “Mom won’t take me to Europe until I learn to eat HERBS.”</p>
<hr>
<p>daughter (age 3) pointing to a patio set “I like that red unumbrella”</p>
<hr>
<p>daughter (age 3, pointing to a Jesus on the cross in a Mexican church “Look, there’s that funny dancing man again”</p>
<hr>
<p>son (after a presentation on Hanuka in kindergarten) “I think it would be fun to be Jewish”</p>
<p>mom “Really? why?”</p>
<p>son “You can eat latkes, spin the dradle, dance the hora”</p>
<p>mom “Do you know how to dance the hora?”</p>
<p>son (wistfully) “No, but I bet it’s fun…”</p>
<hr>
<p>mom and daughter are bickering. Son “Oooh, a cat fight”</p>
<p>mom and daughter “Nah, this isn’t a catfight.”</p>
<p>son (disappointed.) “Oh… I wanna see one.”</p>
<p>I just love these.</p>
<p>My daughter around age 3 or 4 would earnestly ask bizarre non sequiturs. I remember one vividly. She came out of her bedroom looking thoughtful and asked her brother and me, “What if there was a dog?”</p>
<p>I just looked at her dumbly for a moment before replying, “Um…well, I guess there would be a dog, then.”</p>
<p>She then explained impatiently, “No, no, no. I mean, what if there was a dog and it was really really big and it had a red nose and it could drive a car?”</p>
<p>My son and I looked at each other and then laughed and laughed. We still tease her about this, and probably will forever.</p>
<p>When D was 3, I used to give her some plastic bowls and spoons to stir while I was cooking, and often I’d narrate what I was doing: “now let’s add the tomato paste…” So, one day I was making sauce, and D asks, “Mommy, is it time to put in the tomato glue?”</p>
<p>My nephew was spending the day with his grandmother when he was about 2 or 3. For some reason he had opened the refrigerator door and taken out an egg, then accidentally dropped it and it splattered all over the floor. His grandmother walked into the kitchen and looked at the mess and said, “Well, we’ll have to clean that up.” Nephew looked at the mess on the floor, then pointed to the egg compartment in the fridge: “Egg don’t fit no more, gwandma.”</p>
<p>When D was not quite a year old, my husband had given her and her brother, age 3, a bath. H was dealing with drying D off and diapering her, and didn’t pay a lot of attention to what S was up to. He turned around to discover S had been exploring in the cabinet under the bathroom sink. He had taken out 2 panty-liners, pealed the backs off, and stuck them side by side on the bathroom scale. He pointed at the scale proudly and said to his dad, “Look! Footprints!”</p>
<p>When my children (now rising sophomore and rising senior) were about 3 and 5, I heard them threatening each other and couldn’t figure out why they said this: they would say, “You’re going to be pooked tomorrow,” meaning that dire consequences will follow. Then it finally came to me when watching a Veggie Tales video. The grandfather was reading to a child and said it was time to go to bed, or the child would be “pooped” (that is, tired out) the next day. I still don’t know what they thought would happen if someone was pooked.</p>
<p>My brother used to make all sorts of weird comparisons like “I’m stuffed as a parakeet”. I also distinctly remember a story he wrote in kindergarden: On the third day we went to the farm. The pig ate me.</p>
<p>very much out of character, son decided to try out for cross country in middle school. </p>
<p>mom (after the first day of practice) “how was it?”
son: “it was hell. hard. and really hot.”
mom: "what did you guys do?
son: “coach made us do the course, from school to the park and back.” (total of about 10 city blocks)
mom “and…how did you do?”
son: “OK, I guess. I made it.”
mom “was what your time?”
son: (blank faced) “what do you mean?”
mom: “you know - when the coach timed you. How fast did you run?”
son: (aghast) “mom! we WALKED.”</p>
<p>and that was that for cross country.</p>
<p>S (now 24) was 3.</p>
<p>Before bed prayer:</p>
<p>Me: Now I lay me,
S: Now I wayme,
Me: down to sleep.
S: dow ta feep.
Me: I pray the lord,
S: Pway the LOWahhhd
Me: my soul to keep.
S: Sowtateep.
Me: If I should die,
S: Fishouldie
Me: before I wake
S: Fowiwate
Me: I pray the lord
S: Pway the LOWahhhhd
Me: my soul to take.
S: Sowtata.</p>
<p>Sweet fragrant soft yummy love.</p>
<p>Younger son always wanted to work on the “Buppppppppppooootuh” (making the ppp’s sound like a little engine). He’s now studying computer science =) .</p>
<p>DD has always been a bit of a foodie…when she was 3, she overheard someone use the phrase “serial killer”. She had a stricken look on her face as she turned to me and asked, “Mommy, why would anybody hurt cereal?”! In kindergarten, she was quite insistent that “Indians make butter”, which puzzled her teacher until she was enlightened by the logo on the Land O Lakes package I had sent to school for their Thanksgiving feast.</p>
<p>I always found amusing when my oldest,as a kindergarten student, would refer to the morning announcements as “the words that come out of the wall”.</p>
<p>I love these! Hugcheck you should have the little prayer printed nicely and framed.
I do have another one. </p>
<p>During a regular medical check-up my sister-in-law mentioned what a terrible eater her then 5-year old son was. Doctor turned to the boy and asked, “Kevin, what’s your favorite food?” Kevin gave it a moment’s thought before he replied “Salt.”</p>