<p>My son is acquainted with a young woman who is dealing with an unwanted pregnancy and would like to place her child up for adoption. She has no parental guidance so she has asked me through my son for help. I don’t know a soul in OK, so would be grateful if anyone on CC could point me in the right direction.
Thanks.</p>
<p>Here’s the Oklahoma directory of the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys. Probably a good place to start:
[American</a> Academy of Adoption Attorneys -](<a href=“http://www.adoptionattorneys.org/states/state.asp?st=OK]American”>http://www.adoptionattorneys.org/states/state.asp?st=OK)</p>
<p>Best of luck.</p>
<p>Does she have to go through an attorney? Can’t she approach a NON-PROFIT agency? </p>
<p>This looks promising:</p>
<p>[Oklahoma</a> Adoption Coalition](<a href=“http://www.oklahomaadoptioncoalition.org/about_oac.html]Oklahoma”>Oklahoma Adoption Coalition)</p>
<p>I think it’s not such a bad idea to consult with an attorney who may be able to recommend good local agencies. There is a huge range of agencies, some good, some not so good, some evil (even though they are often all nonprofit licensed adoption agencies), and it can be hard for a young woman in this situation to sort through her options. Agencies make their bread and butter from helping families who want to adopt, and it can be difficult to find one that has the birth mother’s interests in the forefront although they all say they do. A pregnant woman interested in placing her baby should be able to get free consultations. An attorney can help her know what to find out from an agency.</p>
<p>Domestic adoption laws and regulations vary hugely from state to state so it’s important to find someone local (unlike international adoption, for which it doesn’t matter at all, except for the homestudy which must be done by someone licensed in the prospective adoptive parent’s home state). So getting advice from someone with experience in a different state is often counterproductive.</p>
<p>Thank you oldmom. Interesting link Consolation. The few friends I have that are parents through adoption utilized attorneys, but that has been over 15 years ago now. I am out of my wheelhouse.</p>
<p>I would also suggest she call family court in the county/city where she lives. If she chats up a nice person there, she may be able to get advice as to who in town handles many of the adoptions. They can be VERY helpful.</p>
<p>Have him contact adoption agencies in his city. They would be more than happy to provide all the adoption resources he and the birthmother will need, and it will be much less expensive than using an attorney.</p>
<p>An adoption attorney will almost always give a FREE consultation to a pregnant woman considering relinquishing her baby.</p>
<p>My son is not the father of this baby, so he and by extension I, are disinterested ( from a legal perspective) parties. That is one of the reasons I thought of an attorney might be in order. The young woman really needs an advocate. I am told her mother is putting enormous pressure on her to keep the child and the child’s father is equally adamant that she have an abortion, neither of which seems appropriate to her. She is not college educated, is missing work because of morning sickness and is overwhelmed with contemplating all the potential scenarios. She is leaning on my son because he lends a sympathetic ear without having an agenda, but he really can’t offer any real help. I think that’s why he reached out to me.</p>
<p>A local hospital would have a list of agencies and attorneys that they give woman who come to the hospital wanting to consider adoption and haven’t formalized a plan prior to birth. If she has a relationship with her dr., (which she may not due to the early stage of her pregnancy), that office may have a recommendation of attorney/agency.
She is lucky to have your son. Difficult situation when there is support, so sad that she doesn’t have any when she needs it the most.</p>
<p>She can contact Catholic Charities Adoption for Ok City website and they will help her. Being Catholic is NOT req’d or expected. She will not be charged.</p>
<p>[Catholic</a> Charities | Welcome](<a href=“http://catholiccharitiesok.org/index.php?id=21]Catholic”>http://catholiccharitiesok.org/index.php?id=21)</p>
<p>None of the adoption agencies nor the attorneys will charge her any fees. It’s the adopting parents who pay. I would tend to think that the agencies would have better counseling services and more families to choose from.</p>
<p>Should this young woman expect to have her medical fees and pregnancy costs covered by the parents she places the baby with (or the agency, if the adoption is anonymous)?</p>
<p>Yes, I’ve heard of these fees being covered. I’ve even heard of adoptive parents paying living expenses during the pregnancy. If she’s missing a lot of work and might need help with expenses, an attorney might be a better way to go.</p>
<p>This is a general question, as I have no knowledge of this gutsy young woman. </p>
<p>What happens if the adopting parents pay expenses, and then the birth mother sees her baby and decides she can’t bear to place it for adoption?</p>
<p>My H is an OB GYN and periodically makes contacts between women w unwanted pregnancies and infertile patients who would love to adopt. I have no idea when and where a lawyer comes in, but just wanted to offer the suggestion that her OB GYN might know of a promising couple.</p>
<p>
The adoptive parents are just plain out-of-luck. There have even been cases of women who had no intention of placing their baby collecting the money. I think law enforcement will get involved in some cases, especially when they’ve promised the baby to more than one couple. It’s a big gamble and many couples turn to foreign adoption because of the risks.</p>
<p>Of course an attorney will give a free consultation. An adoptable infant, especially if the bio parents are white and the young woman is not a drug or alcohol abuser and will get prenatal care, is an enormously valuable commodity. The attorney stands to collect significant fees from the adoptive parents. Think of it as being similar to realtors looking for listings. Of course, agencies charge prospective parents fees also. Here’s an interesting page:</p>
<p>[The</a> Adoption Guide: The Adoption Planner 2007](<a href=“http://www.theadoptionguide.com/tools/planner/budgets.php]The”>http://www.theadoptionguide.com/tools/planner/budgets.php)</p>
<p>This seems like a very informative adoption website. It doesn’t APPEAR to be linked to any group with an axe to grind. Here’s another page:</p>
<p>[The</a> Adoption Guide: Getting Started in Domestic Adoption](<a href=“http://www.theadoptionguide.com/options/domestic-adoption]The”>http://www.theadoptionguide.com/options/domestic-adoption)</p>
<p>They also give state-specific info.</p>
<p>I have friends on various sides of the adoption triad. At least one was referred through an OB-GYN, as PG suggests.</p>