I’m writing my college essay right now, and I am recalling an example of bullying from my past. I was called “fag” in middle school, and I’m considering using an account of that as an example of what spurs me to fight for gay rights. Is this too risky? Or is this just edgy enough?
“fag” is pejorative but it is not the same as a swear word. It also is, unfortunately, used more generally as a synonym for “wimp”.
I would not see any issue for noting that someone called you that. I would even say “N-word” and so on would be acceptable to use to demonstrate hate speech directed at the applicant.
I would not however suggest using swear words beyond dam and heck (the stronger forms should be okay, I mean). F-word would be right out IMHO.
Or, you could say “homophobic slur” if you aren’t sure.
Let me begin by saying that I’m so sorry you had it so rough. It always makes my heart hurt to hear of what some kids go through.
Now, to answer your question.
I would absolutely NOT use it. At least around here, it goes beyond “wimp.” It’s implying that you’re gay, and it’s used to hurt kids, usually in middle school. It’s said with hate by homophobic little boys who think they’re tough.
But let’s backpeddle a little. The point behind this essay is to “give them a reason to say yes”-- and you only have 650 words in which to do it.
Why are you writing about being a victim? And, even more than that, why are you spending some of those precious words describing the particular kind of bullying you suffered.
I would cover it by saying something along the lines of “the hurtful names I was occasionally called in middle school inspired me to…”
Everyone knows what words were used. I wouldn’t waste any of those precious 650 words belaboring the point. Don’t concentrate on the bullying, concentrate on all the good things you’re doing.
@bjkmom I was thinking that it would be an example of something that I’ve overcome. I’ve been told colleges want students that have overcome some kind of adversity and still been able to be successful. I did not think about it as victimizing myself though. Thank you for sharing that viewpoint! If I were to still use it, I would definitely make sure to not appear as though I am whining, and more of having gone through serious psychological trauma and overcame it.
Was this something that you were repeatedly called by numerous people? Or was this a one time thing? If you were called a ‘fag’ once in middle school, I can’t honestly see it as “overcoming adversity” or anything like that. If you were subject to constant bullying, it may be more of a valid point. However, it’s important to realize that you don’t need to have an “overcoming adversity” story in your essay to have a strong application. I’ve overcome significant amounts of adversity, and never mentioned them in my essays. In my opinion, a college essay shouldn’t reflect who you used to be or what used to happen to you. It should reflect who you are and who you’re going to be.
I think it can be a strong topic.
But I think that the emphasis on the name calling should be small and brief.
That frees up so many more words for you to use to tell them positive things about you and what you’ve done and what you’re going to do.
You could always say called hurtful names. If sexual orientation is addressed, the language is likely to be inferred. Did you just overcome that one incident or is it an anecdote of many more? What exactly is this prompt? Good luck!
No, you’re not writing a novel trying to use emphatic language to hook the reader in. They will know what you mean by “gay slur” and it won’t trigger the PC police
I agree with #4 because middle school was long ago BUT if the harassment left a deep impact on you as a person, like it tore you down at first, but surviving it made you stronger and more compassionate in the end or you have used the experience to help others (always spin the positive), then it can be what they’re looking for