No shame, apparently. It is so wrong and insensitive to memorialize a drunk driver and with beer cans yet!
I feel very sorry for the parents of the 14 year old who was killed by this totally irresponsible woman.
Sadly, I am no longer surprised by the stupid things people do. But words do fail me …
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She made a mistake, and nobody’s perfect,” a tearful Natalie Rojas, grieving over the loss of her best friend, said at the vigil Monday night. “But people need to stop talking bad about her.”
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“Nobody’s perfect.” Ugh!
She ruined at least two families lives.
Even as someone who is about as harsh when it comes to drunk driving, having seen far too many accidents as a first responder, I think people may be jumping the gun. The report said the young woman had two drinks at a bar, which by itself likely would not indicate she was drunk at the time of the crash (the BAC done post mortem will tell). It could be this wasn’t a DUI, cops saying alcohol maybe be involved simply means she had had some drinks that night.
That said, a memorial when DUI was potentially involved that includes beer cans is stupid and crass and insensitive, to say the least. As far as the ‘nobody’s perfect’ line goes, if the woman did drive drunk, that is about as crappy an excuse anyone could give, that is basically “gee, Joey was a really nice guy, bought his mother flowers and all that, and that he shot 4 people in cold blood, well, nobody’s perfect so don’t judge him”. Someone who drives drunk is not someone who made a mistake, it is someone who knowingly decided to drive while aware they shouldn’t be, one that has fatal consequences, and should be treated like someone firing a gun in the air and saying “gee, I never thought of that” when a bullet came down and hit and killed someone.
I also hate the “nobody’s perfect” line. No one is asking for perfect. There is a whole lot of ground between being perfect and making it a habit to drive sober.
I think the main problem with drunk driving is that the drivers always think they’re just fine to drive. You can’t accurately assess your own capability once you’ve had a few drinks. Of course the answer is to simply not drink at all if you plan to drive, but few have that kind of self discipline. At one point there was talk of a technology that would require drivers to pass a kind of breathalyzer test or equivalent before allowing the car to start, but I haven’t heard about it in ages. It would be a giant pain for most of us, and for that reason would never be embraced, but I bet such a system would cause drunk driving accidents to plummet and save many lives…
I’m proud of S. He went to an event at a bar with HS classmates. He had D drive him there and was going to have Uber or D pick him up afterward. Uber makes it much easier for folks NOT to drive at all after drinking.
My law firm used to hire a limo service to drive folks home after our New Year’s Eve party. We’d always remind everyone to just get dropped off and leave the driving to the limos. It was fun being driven in the limos.
It’s possible she wasn’t drunk; the police haven’t said yet. It’s possible something else happened on that clear night.
But if she was drunk, I don’t buy the “she made a mistake” line. People who kill other people by driving drunk weren’t behind the wheel drunk for the first time. Even drunkards usually don’t kill. People who kill people driving drunk are people who habitually drive drunk.
This bears repeating as we don’t know her BAC, her alcohol tolerance level at the time, etc.
Then again, best thing to do if one knows one will be driving is to refrain from drinking any alcoholic beverages period. Then again, I speak from the bias as someone who has no problems turning down alcoholic beverages in bars or parties.
Especially if I will be doing something requiring a clear mind and good reflexes such as tackling an exam the following morning* or working on a client machine/server.
- I turned down 2 offers of premium liquor...including a shot of Mao tai from some Profs on two separate occasions during undergrad because I happened to have exams the following morning.
I don’t know if she was drunk. I DO know that getting behind the wheel of a car with any alcohol in your system is a choice, not a mistake. Call it what it is.
I am one of those who has an extremely high tolerance to alcohol. It takes a very large amount before I start to feel the effects. I get that. But I also know that having any alcohol is a choice and a stupid, malicious, and potentially deadly one if you don’t have a ride home lined up (or have plans to stay wherever you are).
A drunk driver nearly killed my father and took many parts of him that I treasured: his memories, his gentle nature, his knowledge of me and my mom, etc. I have absolutely zero tolerance for anyone who drives drunk and I think our laws are way too lenient and easy to get out of if you’re well-off.
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The report said the young woman had two drinks at a bar, which by itself likely would not indicate she was drunk at the time of the crash (the BAC done post mortem will tell).
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Well, a person doesn’t have to be “drunk” to have a BAC that is too high for driving. Buzzed driving is often a too-high BAC.
And, yes, it’s easy to be buzzed after drinking just one drink and certainly after two drinks…particularly women who tend to be smaller. Many bartenders “heavy pour” because they “free pour”.
Her car crossed the median. Absent a finding that she had a heart attack or seizure, we know she was driving recklessly. We’re just waiting to hear why.
I don’t see the point in roadside memorials. Either no one pays attention, so why put it up, or people do pay attention and it’s one more distraction for drivers.
yes, “drunk driving” is an old term rarely used anymore. There are degrees of impaired that most individuals would not consider drunk. A person can be FAR from appearing drunk, yet be beyond a legal limit.
2 drinks in a bar? What’s her weight? Have any food? How long after the second drink until she drove?
Too many questions, at the moment, to condemn her for a DUI. Those questions probably will be answered soon.
The point of roadside memorial is that the survivors left behind feel good about themselves feeling like they have done something good for the deceased, The idea behind it is no different than flowers on a grave in a cemetery. Some feel it is too late to do something good for the deceased, and the good deed should have come while they were alive to enjoy it.
Two drinks and I am most definitely impaired, and I can feel it. I’ve no idea what my BAC is at that point, but I am definitely fuzzier. Three drinks and I’m out like a light. I’m no sylph.
Fortunately, I understand that I have no business driving after drinking.
So sad for the boy, his family, and the woman’s daughter. So many lives ruined.
Yes, but flowers on a grave don’t take a driver’s eyes off the road, although my complaint could be extended to commercial roadside signs.
I am largely still fine after 5 rum and cokes or a few shots of vodka, whiskey, or rum.
However, I won’t opt to drink even a drop of alcohol if I know I’ll be doing anything which requires my full undivided attention and concentration within 36 hours whether it’s a school exam, working on computers, or operating heavy machinery including vehicles.
The kindest thing those survivors could do was help start a fund for the surviving daughter of the now-orphaned D of the driver of cintribite to the family whose car she hit. I also dislike roadside memorials which can be distracting and interfere with driving. They can also drift into the roadway and become a road hazard, especially if they are things that can roll and be blown by the wind.
There is a very long, dark road leading up to my undergrad university that most of us take if coming from the freeway. There are no shoulders and animals are known to jump out. There are probably 3 large, shiny memorials along the side of the road where people have died in crashes. It drove me nuts because they would always catch my attention and I knew they were there. It’s just an instant reaction.