I’ve been living in the basement of a two-story house where the landlord’s family is upstairs. I share the basement with another woman, and I’ve been complaining non-stop about her because she’s super loud. She cooks at night, plays music loudly, walks around the hallway, and even makes noise at the dining table right in front of my room. I couldn’t help but mock her because it sounds like an elephant going up the stairs! I would get off my bed and come out of my room when I heard her leave hers or when she came in through the front door. When she was in the kitchen cooking, I’d stand next to her. I told the landlord that she’s harassing me, and recently she broke my cup because I left my empty pots on the stove. The landlord gave me a warning (my roommate has never complained about me), and said she would evict us both. But my roommate kept being a nuisance, acting like she was untouchable—she would blast music at 6 to 8 PM. The landlord even started vacuuming the floor since her room is right beneath the living room.
Sorry to be blunt but it sounds like you’re part of the problem. What exactly are you hoping to learn by posting this here?
Then move out. Get your own place. Problem solved. Because you sound like the roommate from hell.
Simple. Move.
I agree - move. But who os responsible for the lease - one of you or both of you ? What are the financial obligations and for how long ? Can you afford whatever the contractual penalty ?
It doesn’t sound as if this living situation is salvageable at this point. I agree with others that you should find an alternative.
The question you need to ask yourself, going forward, is whether it was ever salvageable. The way you describe the interaction, it sounds as if you escalated immediately to an adversarial stance. You turned an annoyance into a war, and now you’re mad that you aren’t winning. Did it have to be a war? Are there other approaches you should consider, the next time you find someone rubbing you the wrong way?
Maybe you tried all of the collaborative, empathetic approaches to seeking peaceful cohabitation, and you’re just skipping that part in the retelling. But that isn’t how this reads, at all. “I couldn’t help but mock her,” and “When she was in the kitchen cooking, I’d stand next to her,” combined with repeated complaints to the landlord, make it seem as if your behavior is a bigger problem than hers. And at this point, she may very well be annoying you on purpose in hopes that you’ll leave.
You can ride this 'til the wheels fall off if you want, but I doubt it will end well for you. Knowing when to cut your losses is an important life skill, and it sounds like that line has already been crossed. Best of luck to both of you.
Kinda blunt.
It’s a room in basement of the landlord house there is no lease it’s month to month can give three days notice
Move on then. Maybe find an air bnb for a week or two if you need time to sort things out.
Have you ever had a roommate before? It takes cooperation, compromise, and tolerance as well as an ability to identify what you can and cannot tolerate. If you have tried to speak to her about your concerns and have found her unreceptive, then you either have to tolerate it or look for an alternative. It doesn’t sound like the landlords are going to intervene in this situation.
It sounds like you and the roommate are not compatible with each other, nor are you compatible with the landlord. It’s probably a good idea to explore finding other options for living arrangements.
Not should they have to. A landlord is not an RA or a den mother.
Don’t know the terms of the month-to-month rental arrangement, but if these two renters are high maintenance or make the homeowners uncomfortable in any way, the homeowners I would think would have the right to intervene in terms of telling them that their month-to-month will not be renewed at the end of the month
And it sounds as if that outcome has already been foreshadowed in the interactions with the landlord.
If I rented out my basement to a couple of college students, I would expect them to solve their own issues around personal habits and consideration. Sure, come to me if something breaks. But if I wanted to deal with this sort of “Mommmm! She’s touchingggg meeee!” drama, I’d become a foster parent, not a landlord.
It’s an interesting arrangement- month to month with 2 separate rooms in a shared basement. Sounds like an Airbnb or Vrbo type arrangement.
Definitive answer. This isn’t working. Find a new place to live…sounds like it should be alone…and when you do, give your notice and move on.
Being a roommate is a two way street. It doesn’t sound like this is going to work for you.
Move on.
It’s a detached bungalow house landlord family upstairs basement downstairs two bedrooms kitchen bathroom etc
OP: Could it be that your roommate is being noisy in order to encourage you to move out ?
Disclaimer: I’m a mom to a college sophomore. So that’s the perspective from which I’m writing this feedback.
That being said, here are some things to consider. Some “food for thought”…
- Your landlord is not the same as an RA in a college dorm.
- A landlord is not required to mediate, negotiate, or facilitate disagreements between 2 adults who are renting/leasing space from the landlord.
- You are an adult. You need to figure out a way to be able to co-habitate w/your apartment-mate (aka roommate, but you’re not sharing a bedroom w/the person).
- How did you & the other renter get paired up in the apartment? Did you know her ahead of time? Did you apply for this apartment together? Were you friends beforehand?
- How do you know that your roommate broke your cup because you left empty pots on the stove? Perhaps it was just an accident?
- Were the empty pots clean or dirty? If you’re leaving dirty pots on the stove, that’s being a bad roommate. If you want to live like that, you probably should live alone because MOST adults will find that sort of behavior to be super annoying at best. AND if the empty pots were clean, PUT THE POTS AWAY where they’re normally stored. Like in a kitchen cabinet or something.
- You’re an adult now. Not a child. Your landlord isn’t your mom or dad who you can go complain to and say, “She was mean to me.”
- Doing more of the same stuff you’ve been doing already w/your roommate & landlord are probably going to get you the same unsatisfactory results.
- Don’t mock your roommate. That’s childish. Grow up. Seriously.
- Re: your roommate playing loud music from 6-8 pm. Honestly? 6-8 pm are reasonable hours. What does your lease/rental agreement say re: quiet hours? The city you’re in probably also has noise ordinances…in most cities it’s something like you have to be quiet after 10 pm, but that’s from the perspective of “people outside shouldn’t be able to hear your house party after 10 pm.”
- Some of the noises from your roommate going up & down the stairs during the day MIGHT be just from the age of the house, not-so-great insulation, etc. Houses make noise. If the stairs are wood, then yeah…it’s going to make noise when somebody goes up and down the stairs. YOU make noise when you go up and down the stairs.
- Download a white noise app to your phone and use that. And/or buy a white noise machine to use in your room so the background house noises don’t bother you.
- If/when you move elsewhere, know that when you’re in a communal living environment (dorm, apartment building, etc.), you WILL hear noises from your neighbors. It will NOT be dead silent all of the time. You should expect this. Buy yourself a pair of noise cancelling head phones if the household noises bother you a lot.
Also, remember that smells go up and sound goes down. So if you are incredibly sensitive to sound (someone walking on the stairs, really?) try to live on the top floor. Personally, I could live with an actual herd of elephants above me but one person cooking fish or onions in the building makes me gag.