<p>Hi! I have been lurking for a while. Finally decided it was time to ask experienced parents for insight.
My S is NOT looking forward to returning to campus. He’ll be living in a dorm with friends he plays sports with - they live together, train together, play the same sport, much of the social scene seems to revolve around the same mixed group.He admits it’s very inbred. He IS involved in activities outside of the group . He registered for very tough classes - all engineering, math and science. He see’s no room for much of a break. He enjoys his school, but hates the location. He is starting his second year. Felt like freshman year - he had time to make some decisions - make some mistakes - sophmore year he is going to be expected to commit to a major - he is just not sure where his passion is yet.
Is anybody else dealing with a student maybe not so happy to return??</p>
<p>First of all, welcome.</p>
<p>Second, this sounds totally normal, especially if he’s been having a good summer and has good friends at home. He’s a bit nervous about being in his second year and is questioning his friends, classes, interests, school choice, activities and other decisions he’s made. There are many people who look at things from a negative point of view while away from the situation. A week after looking at a car to buy, for example, someone may see only the flaws when reflecting back on it. After test driving it again, though, the car seems fine. The flaws still exist, but they don’t ruin the car. (That was a horrible analogy–but I hope you see my point.) I think that once he’s back on campus, your son will be fine. If not, you can deal with that as it comes. Encourage him to take a variety of classes and talk to an academic and/or career counselor about options for majors. His social life sounds fine. Not liking one part of a school–such as the location–is very normal. I will say that I am excited to go back for my second year of college in the fall, but I did not feel the same way after being home for Christmas or for a weekend visit. Even though I liked school and everyone else seemed eager to go back, I really didn’t want to. Once I stepped back on campus, though, I was fine. </p>
<p>I get the sense that your son is just experiencing general, normal nerves. Let him talk it out if he wants to, and just encourage him to try to be positive once he starts the year out on campus. I think that he’ll probably be fine. If he’s not, you can deal with that as it comes.</p>
<p>Does he still like the sport and does he have to play, it sounds like burnout to me, or that burnout is coming soon</p>
<p>Has he played the sport for a long time? College sport take up a lot of time and take away alot of freedom, your schedule and choices are pretty much not your own</p>
<p>What is he dreading more- the school work or the being around the same guys day in and day out?</p>
<p>I hope corranged is right, and it’s just the blahs. Some people just have trouble with transitions, even if it’s to something they like.</p>
<p>As an aside, I think there’s some benefit to athletes not rooming with someone else on their team. Training is so intense, and then they’re both on the same schedule all the time. </p>
<p>D’s roommate is an athlete and I think it gives her a break knowing that there will be times she will come back to the room after practice and she’ll have the room to herself for awhile. And I think it’s good for both girls to have the two big overlapping circles of friends; they get more variety in what they do for recreation.</p>
<p>D. spent her last two years of HS at the state math and science, 350 miles from home, and the kids there were discouraged from rooming with a best friend, because the staff thought it was just too much of a strain.</p>
<p>My s too was not eager to return to school his sophmore year. He had a great summer home with his friends and did not want it to end. He arrived at college today and is getting his room set up and I think he is a bit down about being there. I have reassured him that the first few days in a new situation are always the hardest and that once classes, clubs, and social gatherings get going again, he will be fine. </p>
<p>Some kids get apprehensive and think the worst when faced with the unknown of a new semester. Generally, they are fine as the semester gets under way.</p>