<p>HIMom – if those credit cards are in her husband’s name alone, she is not liable. DO not pay them off! Ditto a car loan in his name only. If she doesn’t want the car, let the bank take it. DON’T start paying creditors (or those who claim they are creditors) without getting competent counsel to advise. She needs to hang on to every penny she has.</p>
<p>Friend of mine’s H passed away suddenly and he had all kinds of debt in his name only. Was not her problem. She let the bank take his car, which she didn’t want, told the credit card folks he had no assets to collect, and she was not on those accounts, etc.</p>
<p>The baseline benefit in a traditional pension plan is a Single Life Annuity (SLA). Fixed monthly amount for the life of the EE, no death benefits. Standard form of in a traditional pension plan is 50% J&S – the EE gets a benefit and the spouse gets 50% of that after the EE passes away. The EE gets the actuarial equivalent of the SLA – about 90% of the SLA, and the spouse 50% of that after the EE’s death. </p>
<p>This 50% J&S is different from SS, where EE gets the PIA and spouse gets the greater of 50% of that or his/her benefit based on his/her own earnings.</p>
<p>My dad wanted to waive the 50% J&S and my mom had the wits to call me and ask if that was a good idea. For a spouse who worked PT after raising kids – NOT a good idea to waive.</p>
<p>There are situations where taking the SLA and waiving the 50% J&S may make sense – in particular, where spouses have worked their full careers and have substantial pensions/401(k) accounts. I would seriously consider whether it is a good idea to waive before doing so and talk to the benefits folks/a financial planner, etc. Retiree health coverage is a rare thing these days and is worth the cost of a 50% J&S.</p>
<p>I have a related question: I was recently told that inheritances are separate from communal funds in divorces, at least in some states. Is that true?</p>
<p>For example, if spouse A waits until spouse B inherits money from a parent, then divorces spouse B, does spouse A get to take half the inheritance?</p>
<p>Consolation – I think that is generally true – obviously all states different. Spouse A wouldnt get to take 1/2 the inheritance, unless Spouse B comingles money.</p>
<p>The friend got a letter from the pension plan telling her that benefits ceased upon his death & requesting the death certificate. I told her to ask them for some proof, which she says she will do.</p>
<p>For the federal govt, spouse can get survivor benefits, no matter how much younger s/he is than the retiree, as long as it is chosen.</p>
<p>For those of us who do NOT have pensions, the survivor benefit to spousal pension is a VERY important part of our future financial security. For the federal government, I believe all current/former spouses must sign a notarized statement if they are not getting any portion of the pension and no survivor benefit.</p>
<p>It is VERY scary to find out that you are suddenly without a safety net, when you had thought the spouse had provided adequate protection and you HAD assets.</p>
<p>I believe the CCs were all in their joint names & she’s already been paying them off. She did take them all away when it was clear that he was not being fiscally responsible. They also stopped having him drive at some point before I met her. I believe it is already late to tell her to stop paying off his bills–she paid off his medical bills as well. She does indeed need to save every penny–I bought her dinner tonight and drove her so she didn’t have to drive her car & use up gas. This is a lot for her or any of us to absorb all at once. She protested & I told her we’d love it if she could cook for us some night.</p>
<p>My FIL controlled all the finances for he and my MIL. When he was in the early stages of Alzheimer’s, he got a little odd with money. He would open up accounts, put money in them, and promptly forget about them. And they never received statements.</p>
<p>After he died, my MIL figured out something strange was going on, and started calling all the big investment companies.</p>
<p>She ultimately recovered over $25,000 that she had no idea that my FIL had invested.</p>
<p>I will suggest that she contact all the big investment companies and all the banks in our state, as a start as well. She keeps saying she figures they should have sent them SOMETHING and I tell her not necessarily. The way I see it, she has much to gain and little to lose by trying to contact them. Thanks for supporting my suggestion.</p>
<p>I would keep an eye on the unclaimed property website for your state as well (and the national one). I found some old stocks my Dad forget he had on that site once. It’s worth checking for several years after someone has died. I know some assets of my uncle’s just showed up there that no one knew he had and he died over a year ago.</p>
<p>Hi, she is fortunate to have a friend like you. Can you help her with this, the Hawaii state program for locating unclaimed property, including financial assets. Unfortunately, it may take a while, like over a year, to get into this system. </p>
<p>Thumper, I am not certain what you mean by an issue with the children from first marriage. If Dad gave them money, I think that train has left the station. Had Ops friend been monitoring accounts, etc., she might have raised objection earlier. Not certain what you are suggesting?</p>
<p>“When he was in the early stages of Alzheimer’s, he got a little odd with money.”</p>
<p>Not suggesting this is the case with HImom’s friend, but it’s pretty common that husband and wife have different financial styles. My parents believed in real estate … DW’s parents have ALL their money in 0.1% savings accounts. I’m sure she’d think some of my money choices are loopy. Long ago she said “I don’t want to know.” (I do keep thorough records.)</p>
<p>NewHope33-your DW’s parents sound like my aunt. She can’t sleep at night if she doesn’t have at least $25,000 sitting in her checking account. We have tried to get her to at least open up a money market checking account so she can earn some interest on that but nope, doesn’t want to" take the risk". She has lost so much money over the years because of that but no matter how many spreadsheets we show her, she doesn’t trust it. The problem is, she is going to run out of money if she lives past 90 when she wouldn’t have to worry about that until she was well over 100 if she just rebalanced a bit.</p>
<p>Just wondering if the spouse’s kids are being at all understanding of the financial situation of the Dad’s widow. Some would be…some would not be. Some would be helpful if they could be. Some would not.</p>
<p>“but it’s pretty common that husband and wife have different financial styles.”</p>
<p>Not a matter of style in my FIL’s case. He became unable to fend off the cold calls. In one instance he was persuaded to buy some sort of maternity insurance (he was in his 70’s and MIL is in her 60’s). It’s clearly predatory, and the stuff my MIL was able to find out about, she got the money back. Who knows how much else she never found.</p>
<p>SteveMA - I don’t think your aunt wanting 25K in a safe account accruing little interest. Certainly that is the size of an emergency fund that I strive for. </p>
<p>HImom - I’m surprised that your friend, after being kept out of the loop about finances, had any expectations of being left money after her husbands departure. It seems kind of naive to assume such, especially in a second marriage.</p>
<p>GTalum-that is not her emergency fund, that is her day to day budget account. Her monthly expenses are in the $1000 range. It’s way too much to have in an account like that. The rest of her accounts are in very low interest accounts that have not kept up with the cost of living and she is losing money and buying power and will run out of money if she doesn’t change that.</p>
<p>It’s not just her checking account though, it’s everything and she could be doing a lot better with no more risk than what she has now–in fact her conservative nature is more risky because it can’t keep up with the COL. With her account sizes she could at least be keeping up with inflation in the MM. Again, it’s just an illustration of why it is important to understand how savings plans/retirement plans work no matter how old you are.</p>