<p>Please grade some of my essays that I will be posting from time to time. Here’s one now,</p>
<p>Assignment: Should people take more responsibility for solving problems that affect their communities or the nation in general instead of relying excessively on government?</p>
<p>We love to think that our nations leader should be responsible for our nations overall peace and prosperity. We are sorely mistaken. In believing that Barack Obama is responsible for cutting greenhouse gas emissions by 50 % by 2020, we fail to realize that Obama is just a person, not a God who can create floods and grow trees in a matter of seconds. We often blame Obama when something doesnt go as he promised because we were the ones who put him in power. But rather than accusing our leaders for a certain problem, we must rise as a community and fight for what we believe in.
For example, in the novella Change by Kim Yong-Moo, a teenage boy named Joon, who wishes to make a difference in the world, is living in 21st century Seoul. He lives in a city so reliant on its mayor to the extent that when a minor economic problem arises in the city, the blame falls on the mayor and his cabinet ministers. The mayor promised in his election campaign to create more parks and cut greenhouse emissions by 40 % by 2020. It is already 2025, yet Seoul has not changed for the better. Litter is everywhere, the neglect of parks has caused the people of Seoul to make up every morning to a city that is dull. Condominiums surround the people, turning the atmosphere drab and grey. People are relishing at the though of ousting the incumbent mayor because of what the people call mismanagement of a glorious city. Yet Joon has the courage to stand up and raise his voice. It is not the mayor who is entirely to blame; it is the public. Determined to make a difference, he goes outside every morning cleaning up litter, takes time to plant seeds in whatever patch of green he can find, hoping that the flowers will make the city look more beautiful. This catches on, and other people begin to realize the error of their ways. Joon and his followers hold a rally promoting the idea that the public should take action to halt the grazing of forests to build houses. Soon, with the help of more people along with the mayor, Seoul is transformed from a grey city to a green city, full of life and wonder.
This shows what people can do through cooperation. We should not point fingers at out leader for not creating more jobs, and not improving schools. In the end, we elected the leader and the leader is simply there to guide us and merely help make the nation better. We voted for the leader, and we make the change.</p>
<p>PLEASE give me a honest grade and please give me some constructive criticism.</p>